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Absolutely devastated

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Anonymous

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Absolutely devastated

I have been in my current industry for 15 years total, I did take a 4 year break and worked in a different industry during this break. I was recruited by my current company as they remembered me as a competitor, I took a number of large accounts from them at one point. They asked if I was interested in coming back to the industry, noting the changes in my current company I agreed and was signed on in a role to begin training, leading to me taking over a specialty role when the current salesman retired. He has become increasingly difficult, condescending and often times has made mistakes and made it out to the customers as if I caused the errors. While everyone at the company knows this is how he is and always has been towards everyone. Everyone just accepts it because he makes a ton of money, so company wide, my reputation is in tact but I have become increasingly concerned about my ability to be successful with the customer base, considering his behavior. I have raised these concerns and also asked for an alternative training track as I am not willing to accept his behavior. They declined the alternative training track and I was informed yesterday that they hired his replacement. A young man with no industry experience but a strong drive to do well, I’ve been told. I will be expected to be his support going forward and assist in his training. I did not sleep well last night and am struggling immensely.

I believe this is my sign to search for a new job.

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  1. Anonymous

    His retirement date is spring of next year.

    I feel like I e been punched in the gut, punished for speaking up.

  2. Anne Krook

    I am so sorry. Get your resume up to date, start networking, and go look for another job. When you leave, you can let them know that one reasons you are leaving is that they hired someone with no experience over you, someone with experience and a track record.

  3. Anonymous

    From what you share, it sounds like their actions are clear- They have objectives and you need to play their way.

    Since you're in a position that relies on relationships, do the best you can to keep your reputation/integrity intact. If your gut says something's wrong and you've done what you can to attempt to fix it and it still feels wrong, you have two choices:

    1. Stay because you have to - and play "their game." If you have the title and the salary you want (specialty role), it may not matter that you're a support (or reframe it to "Individual Contributor). There's nothing wrong with saying you won't train "up" your boss without a pay/title bump---though I think you know what the answer will be----There's something to be said for most companies not caring about the interpersonal details. Is this your work culture? They don't care , just get the work done sort of place? If so, then you can design how you do things (and you likely won't be supported----the old "ask for forgiveness not permission" mindset). Also, you determine how much you share/train the new manager.

    or 2. Leave.
    ---Sounds like you tried another option (finding middle ground) and it didn't benefit you (or they aren't budging--which is an answer). So there's an option of "quiet quitting." If that doesn't benefit you, then start looking. Heck, maybe the salesman who is retiring wasn't always this way, maybe became this way because of higher level company culture. You'd know best. Also, the new manager may value you on the team (yep, our ego takes a hit when we're passed over).

    Keep connecting, keep searching, and find what works.
    Good luck!

  4. Anonymous

    From what you outlined, I would at least give this new hire a chance while you shop for your newt adventure.

  5. Anonymous

    Yes, you should move on. Sad as it is, they didn't keep their promise to you for whatever reason. If you can document sexism or ageism, you may be able to sue, but it would be a pyrrhic victory if you want a good recommendation going forward.

    While you are polishing your resume, try to find out whether they had issues with your performance... or thought there were issues. He probably badmouthed you to higher-ups. If you do well with this new hire, you can at least restore your reputation while you plan your escape.

  6. Anonymous

    I’d be willing to bet that the predecessor chose his successor.

  7. Janet Parkhurst

    Good point!

  8. Anonymous

    From what you've shared, I think if I were you, I'd be looking to peace out. Sounds like they originally hired you with the intent to replace someone and then all of a sudden something new, shiny, untested, unexperienced comes along...and boom, the role you thought you were going to be in in the near future is suddenly yanked out from under you. Even better, you will be supporting him and you will be assisting in his training. Eff them.

  9. Anonymous

    All I can say is eewww. Not fun and sorry you’re dealing with this. However, you need to get some allies to support you. Too many people have say over your career path. You are in a very vulnerable position if “they” can just switch out you for some green guy. Are you sure you were hired to replace the sr sales guy? If so go to whomever hired you who has authority and get to the bottom of it.

  10. Kat

    Yes it's a sign - take it! The company has shown you who they are, so believe them. They will not promote you into the job you should have, probably because you rocked the boat and wanted to upset their status quo. That they want you to train someone inexperienced to be your boss is incredibly insulting and shows how little they value you and your skill set. It may take some time to find a different job, but start looking now. You deserve better and I'm sure you can find it. Or you can start your own company and do things better for their clients.

  11. Anonymous

    Yes, being absolutely devastated is your sign that you will continue to suffer. Sometimes no matter how sweeping the changes are (as in a brand new leader coming aboard) you have internalized the conflict and can't get past the behavior of the former leader.

  12. Anonymous

    yes, I would say it is a big sign.

  13. Anonymous

    Yes, I think you should look for something else.

  14. Marcia Smith

    It is clear that they have no respect for your or your experience. Time to go.... Good luck finding a place that you love and loves you back. They might be hard to find, but the do exist :)

  15. Anonymous

    Find a job with a competitor. You have industry experience. Even if you have a non-compete I would still give it a try; those are not holding up these days.

  16. Anonymous

    Do you have an enforceable noncompete, preventing you to work for another competitor? If not try to find a job with the best one, good luck.

  17. Carol Hubb

    Agree

  18. DirectGirl

    Yes. Sorry.

  19. Andrea

    Don't ignore the signs.

  20. Linda Schultz

    I'm so sorry to hear this. Listen to your inner 6th sense and look at the signs. Start searching.

  21. Anonymous

    "I have raised these concerns and also asked for an alternative training track as I am not willing to accept his behavior."

    You made a cardinal mistake!

    You knew this person's reputation was tolerated because of his ability to produce revenue, yet you foolishly tried to force your employer's hand, which never plays out well.

    Businesses exist to make $$$$$, not to cater to your sensitivities. I have seen your scenario many times throughout my career and have come to understand why employers value top performers and why they tend to ignore—to an extent—their behaviours.

    Next time read the room better!!!!

  22. Material Girl

    How is asking for an alternative solution "forcing their hand"?

  23. Anonymous

    Awesome job at blaming someone in need of support!

    /s

  24. Anonymous

    How is blaming the poster for not having read the room correctly blaming someone "in need of support"?

    Support for what?

    She knew this person's reputation was tolerated, and yet as a NEW EMPLOYEE she went to her boss and basically complained about this person. (Asked for an alternative training track is a form of complaining.)

    WHen you're new to a company, you need to humble yourself and work VERY HARD at fitting into the culture, as opposed to trying to change it or point out the wrongs of established employees.

  25. Janet Parkhurst

    Support for what? Support is why we all come to this site and post about experiences we find unpleasant or as having backfired on us, despite our best intentions, behaviors and efforts. Of course, responders can point out mistakes that may have been made (these situations cannot be airbrushed), but blame for "abstract" situations such as not being able to read a room is not helpful.

  26. Anonymous

    I'm sorry this happened. These were no accidents. These clowns were placed in your path for a reason. Be your cordial and professional self. Perform as you would if you were working with someone you respected and liked. You never know, Clown

    #2's uncle could be in the next company you work. It's a small world.

    Parallel to that work with all your gut for exit plan and action. I would be careful what you post or like on LinkedIn, etc. not to give off signals that you're looking.

    (This is the step I'm stuck on) but try to forgive. Write letters in journals about your disappointment and unfairness, even if you have to do it daily.

    You sound like a true expert in your industry and role. Focus on your strengths. Leave these clowns behind. You deserve to be peaceful and happy, you have more than earned it. If you have to sign anything in the next role, maybe get a lawyer to look at any contracts..... Good luck

  27. Julie E

    I would start looking immediately. They lured you in thinking this was going to be your role and then gave it to someone else. The fact that he’s a man makes me wonder if this company has a misogynistic good ol’ boys culture. Start applying with the competition if you want to stay in this industry or reconsider the one you worked in for the four years, or both.

  28. Rosa Goes

    I'm sorry to hear you are feeling devastated. If I understand correctly, you were hired for a specialty role but not replacing the salesman? If so then it's great news, you don't have to deal with him, if not then I think it's time to look for another job. There's a reason why you left in the first place. Keep in mind the salesman is likely behaving that way because he is near retirement. Not excusing his behavior at all, but just saying.

  29. Anonymous

    You said at one point you took a number of accounts from this company. Perhaps they didn’t hire you be they thought you did a great job, but because if you work for them , you can’t take accounts from them.

  30. Anonymous

    I feel like it’s about and switch find a better job that aligns with your goals and hasn’t lied to you about your role

  31. Anonymous

    Its not all bad. At least you'll be working for this new guy while you look for a new job. They hired you because you were so good, that you took business from them. That's why they needed you to work for them.

    Now you can work for their competitor and you know how your current company works.

    Are you in Marketing?

  32. Tami L Cannizzaro

    I agree with others that at this point, time to keep smiling and working while searching for your next opportunity. As I read your post, one thing crossed my mind: You said at one time you were working for a competitor, actually taking current business from your current company. I'm wondering if they hired you with the hope of recouping some of this lost business? Have you brought these clients (or similar) back to the company? If not, they may feel as if their hiring strategy didn't work, so now they want to hire someone different. Just a thought.

  33. Anonymous

    I have in fact brought back a number of accounts and helped gain new ones. I rekindled relationships with vendors, found former colleagues at new companies in the same industry and have a great network. I have received excellent reviews and gained 4 raises in my 2 1/2 years with my current company. I keep myself accountable when I get something wrong and do my best to learn from any mistakes. I have completed a number of industry specific training program’s gaining some great certifications and am on our culture committee. I’m not sure what else it would be unless they don’t want to find my replacement and have pigeon holed me in this support role.

  34. Anonymous

    P.S. to all this advice. If it were me, the training of the person who got the role dangled in front of you would be very limited.

  35. Anonymous

    I love this, but it’s not this persons fault he was brought into an unknown situation and I hate to see anyone fail. I may feign ignorance on some topics though until I can find my way out.

  36. Sarah Chambers

    It was this part "While everyone at the company knows this is how he is and always has been towards everyone. Everyone just accepts it because he makes a ton of money"

    Been there and with support moving on from it, many others have seen it too. I managed a team and escalated his behavior most often on my team as well as me personally. It took many coming forward to get it the attention needed. Oh and when the dust settled, sales actually increased. Weird right? It shouldn't be. That stuff impacts everyone. Since they've done it already, they are openly saying they don't care about people. Aka Toxic environment .

    It's 100% good you no longer deal with that guy, but I'd accept that red flag and keep searching for the right company. Told only from my experience but hope it helps!

  37. Anonymous

    I just left a company after 3 months because their 2 most seasoned employees are incredibly toxic and incompetent. Management admits to it even but are afraid to do anything about it. It was ridiculous.

  38. Anonymous

    It sounds like you're great at what you do, and I wouldn't let a company get in the way of your incredible career.
    Actively search and network - build a strong sense of the value you bring by interviewing and landing offers. From here you can either choose to stay and negotiate a better role for yourself or leave for the better offer. Either way, you keep your reputation intact and your principles. It's certainly a terrible situation, but you have the benefit of a clear understanding of where you stand and what you bring. Moving forward can be hard, but it sounds like you're very capable, and highly valued in your field.

  39. Anonymous

    I can tell you from experience--not that I've ever worked in sales, but I know how companies operate--that they hired you to bring your customers to them.
    There is no loyalty or tact in business in the US. We are noted for this worldwide.

    So, as is always true, this is a challenge in life with which you have been presented. Work to turn it around. It does take two to tango everywhere in life.

    You can make a huge difference by simply feeling differently towards him, by having more compassion, as it really does seem that he struggles, and give him the respect we all deserve and you will not believe your eyes over time. Change your thoughts, change your beliefs, and you will change your life, and turn this around. You may even gain a friend. Trust me. Just don't take any of it to heart. I know you can do it. Give it a certain period of time, then look for a job if you can't do it. Your company has already gained what they wanted.

  40. Anonymous

    In the worst case scenario, perhaps the memories of what you did to your current company as a competitor are still lingering in the minds of those leaders who were around to witness it and they’re being petty, keeping you in check.
    Or, it could be that they don’t know how to best utilize your skills. In either case, keep your options and your eyes open for better opportunities because you deserve it.

  41. 1stBossLady

    Came here to say this. Sounds like pretty revenge.

  42. Kathy

    Don't wait. Update your resume and start looking for a new position. They are phasing you out as soon as you 'train' the replacement.

    Good luck!

  43. Terri Radomski

    This happened to me last week.

    They told me I needed to cross train. Little did I know I was training this monster for my job. I was laid off after 10 years . Its devasting and it is so wrong. I want to give them a piece of my mind but I need to let go. Karma will eventually get them.

  44. Kathy

    It's devastating and hurtful. Especially after working hard and doing the best job you can do. I'm sorry this happened to you. Good luck in your healing.

  45. Wanda

    So sorry this happened to you. But maybe it's a blessing in disguise and you've been released to pivot and go into a different direction.

  46. Anonymous

    It's a terrible feeling when an employer can make you feel less than. I'm somewhat in the same situation. I hope you take the leap and find another position.

  47. Material Girl

    Looks like the company pulled a bait and switch on you. Even if you had a good relationship with the guy who's retiring, that still doesn't guarantee you his job after he leaves.

    Sorry this happened to you. Best you start looking for a new job and reach out to your network. Meanwhile continue to be professional and try to build a positive relationship with the new guy you're training. You can then bask in the reflected glory of mentoring a rising star, while you're planning to leave.

  48. Janet Parkhurst

    Hi Material Girl,

    I respectfully disagree with your advice. Why should she waste her time buying into their bullshit? I wouldn't give them another second of MINE. I don't see any value whatsoever in "basking in the reflected glory of mentoring a rising star..." I'd be reflecting on what a sucker I was.

  49. Material Girl

    When did I say she's buying into their bullshit? It's about making the best of a crappy situation while she looks for another job and being strategic about it.

    Just because someone may not be able to quit on the spot doesn't make them a sucker.

  50. Janet Parkhurst

    I'm sorry. This situation is so vile, there's no "making the best of a crappy situation." It's a waste of time and soul sucking. Don't forget--our mental health is at stake as well as our checking account. Some things are just unresolvable.

  51. Anonymous

    If they lay her off or other, she has decent odds of getting unemployment in most states. If she quits, she does not.

  52. Jennifer Falandys

    Time to move on. They really did you dirty and if they allow that for the sake of the money... I don't know what your values are but, I resigned from my job for two reasons, one because of their lack of integrity there, and two because I got hit by a car on the way to meet with someone to look for a new job. I had my resignation letter in my purse that day.

    I joke with myself that it was universe speaking so that they could not keep begging me to stay every time I told them I was going to leave. They would pull me back and make all these promises, then told me they would hire someone so I could train them and lied about that too.

    They never intended to if I left, they dissolved my program and moved the money where a competitive co-worker wanted it.

    Best of luck to you. We deserve better.

  53. Janet Parkhurst

    Quit. Now.

  54. 1stBossLady

    Sounds like someone at the company wanted to punish you for past business. Go do what makes YOU HAPPY!

  55. Diana Rollins

    You are in a specialty role, correct? How will that change with a new salesperson? Isn't having the difficult, condescending one leave a good thing? A fresh start? What are your concerns moving forward?

  56. Amala Lane

    I think you're right. You owe them nothing. Leave. It's their loss.

  57. Kristie White

    Yes this is your sign. They have rehired you to remove you from the competition, not because they want you to sell for them. This was a bait and switch.

  58. Anonymous

    Thanks so much everyone, my husband and I sat down, reviewed our finances and with some budget adjustments, I believe I can take my time searching for a new opportunity. I know this can’t happen for everyone. Our only child is independent and moved out so I don’t have that stress. I am finishing up some key items that I want to complete, will turn in my notice and enjoy my summer resting. Maybe taking some new skills courses and take my time on the job search. I appreciate everyone’s encouragement and advice.

  59. Anonymous

    That is so great. Congrats! I am still taking it easy from a toxic job I endured for over two years. You deserve it. And yes, taking courses is a good and fun thing to do. You've got to keep an active mind! Best of luck to you. I know, given your experience, you will find something fantastic!

  60. Wanda

    This is great news!

  61. LORI-ANN BURLINGAME

    Why were you rehired?

    Is your coworker's gruff behavior a test to see how well you would interact with the company's client base? (The good old boy club.) This may not be a culture that embraces a confident woman.

    You deserve better - I would start looking for another opportunity.

  62. David Branham

    By all means - they don’t seem to respect what you’ve given or give you a clear sign your options (or cater growth ) is limited

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