Everybody loves you when you let everything slide, but as soon as you start checking things and creating boundaries, you become the most hated.

7 Comments

1. AnonymousNovember 11,2024 at 3:25PM UTC

   Oh well. You just go with the flow.

2. AnonymousNovember 11,2024 at 4:03PM UTC

   In the end you will be more respected when you speak up. You are an administrator, it is your job to deescalate and manage others. I would recommend bringing in someone from your HR organization to conduct an Organizational Development exercise. It should be in their line up of offerings. And require all staff to attend. Team building is also in their wheelhouse. It can help people and also help defuse future blow ups. No one likes conflict. No one likes to step in. But when we have grown adults acting like 5 years olds in a work space they have deemed "daycare", it's the responsibility of the leader to take action. If they see you as the bad guy, put them on your watch list and make sure they have an email from you with the support of HR to let them know expected behaviors, and expected outcomes. Those who speak up make change. Those who sit and do nothing are complacent and will never make or accept change. If they are your peers, tell them to take a breath and talk with you when they can be more respectful. And finally, if the teacher was one of the culprits that asked for a reference, give it. Only to say, you confirm they worked under your direction for said time. If the culprit is trying to get out, give them that extra hand to help them leave. Then maybe other things will be a bit more calm. People really need to work on their emotional intelligence in the work place.

3. AnonymousNovember 12,2024 at 1:41PM UTC

   Yep. Just experienced this morning. Have a team member who has a lot of flexibility around their work schedule. The rule is as long as they get their work done. Now they want to take a specific day off, the first of the month when what they do impacts everything across the business and I'm the bad guy for having a problem with that. There are very few "have to" with this job but being on shift for the first day of the new business month is one of them.

   All that 'respect' for being a flexible Supervisor goes right out the door when I have to enforce the important rules, now I'm the big bad witch because the other person couldn't pay attention to the date.

4. Mary PattersonNovember 12,2024 at 1:47PM UTC

   That is just the way people go!! They are always most happiest until the boundary wall and lines are drawn to protect you!!

5. Sandra SwearingenNovember 12,2024 at 2:01PM UTC

   The higher up in leadership you go the less friends you have because you have to make the hard decisions and hold people accountable. You’re doing a good job so learn to ignore the slackers and keep holding them accountable.

6. Tina MorenoNovember 12,2024 at 2:22PM UTC

   I totally get it. I spent 15 years in education, and you know what--it has nothing to do with the industry. That dynamic, where people let things slide until someone finally steps in, is everywhere. But that’s where the line is drawn between being just a manager and being a true leader.

   Taking accountability and holding our teams accountable isn't always popular, but it’s vital—and it’s something we should definitely screen for more in hiring. You showed real leadership today by stepping in, even if it wasn’t appreciated in the moment. I admire that, and I hope you won’t dwell on the gaslighting or the reactions. You did what was needed, and that’s what matters most.

7. Feon ChauNovember 13,2024 at 4:58AM UTC

   Thank you all for the insights and support from this community! Leadership is such a delicate balance and hearing from others who understand that makes all the difference. Grateful for this space. Here's to the ups and downs of leading!