Major dilemma: I got recruited (again) and I’m completely torn on whether to take it.

Major dilemma: I got recruited (again) and I’m completely torn on whether to take it.

I am in a unique situation and I’m completely torn down the middle on my decision. I work for county government and oddly enough got recruited into my current job too, a little over a year ago. I worked for my current organization during Covid but left for a higher paying gig with more responsibility. Then I left that job for what I thought would be less stressful more fun non profit (I learned this was a big mistake because it was way more stressful and under-resourced).

Then about a year ago my current employer called me and asked if I wanted to come back to my old job. I was flattered. It paid much more than it used to and added more responsibility. It got me out of the nightmare I was in, so I took it.

However, I am on the opposite end of the political spectrum from most of my coworkers (about 15 people work here so I feel very alone). The water cooler talk is rather toxic at times, these people are bullies and I am a sensitive soul. I didn’t know how bad it was when I worked for them before because I was working from home during covid.

Now, a neighboring (more progressive) county asked me to come do the same job for them for the same pay. I love the people who work there (I’ve been searching for these people and this culture for years!!) and they allow hybrid which I really want and don’t currently have. I know I would be so much happier there, but it’s not a pay increase or increase in responsibility. It would also be one more job hop on my resume, totaling 6 moves in 8 years (5 organizations, and I’m 32 years old).

I know this is an awful look, but most of the moves, except the one with the nonprofit described above, were a step up and I feel I can explain them well in any potential future interviews. Also, if I take this new job and stay for a while, maybe it doesn’t matter? And if I keep getting recruited, aren’t I just taking advantage of the opportunities that come my way? Or would moving again be serious damage to my reputation?

What do you all think? I’m completely torn and looking for advice. Thank you in advance!

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24 Comments

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  1. Dr. Patty Gross

    The choice is quite simple. Is the pay increase and position worth the aggravation and coming home with your nerves on edge every night (I'm presuming that is what would happen)? One lateral move when everything else was a move up, even on a resume that shows frequent moves, will not hurt your future chances. If you're only 32 years old, it shows that you are still getting your bearings in the marketplace, and now have probably found your niche, but with a better company. Weigh the aggravation of a toxic environment against being around people who could be more aligned with your own beliefs and work ethic. Then take that and the pay difference against your budget and see what flushes out. Only you have the answers here. Some people are attuned to different points of view and enjoy the debate, so long as it stays healthy. Others find it full of triggers, and it weighs on their mental health and self-image. You need to do what is best for you. Read what you wrote here three times, and you may find your answer.

  2. Anonymous

    Thank you for your thoughtful response, I think you helped me find my answer!

  3. Anonymous

    Ultimately, only you can decide. How much stress will commuting to the neighboring county cause you, versus the stress you are encountering working with bullies every day? If the pay is the same, the commute isn't stressful, and the two jobs are equally stable, I would definitely get out of the oppressive situation and into one where I work with more like-minded people. Try making a pro-con checklist for changing jobs and see which side outweighs the other. If the list still seems equal, trust your gut. What is your gut feeling telling you about this?

  4. Cynthia Nell

    I think you are stuck in a "grass is always greener" mindset. You have to realize the bigger picture here is that NO job is perfect and it seems like each time you land a new job, you find something (or someone) that makes it a poor choice. You are the common denominator here. It is inevitable that if you leave to go to the next job, you will find something wrong there too because, "no matter where you go, there you are".

    Also consider if you do leave again and that new job lets you go for whatever reason, your resume will definitely be a "red flag" for any new employer. In this highly competitive job market, the last thing you need is a resume that screams "disloyalty"!

  5. Barb Hansen

    Your career path is yours, don’t let an outdated stereotype, invented decades ago by corporations to keep people in place, dictate your choices. That “if you leave, it’ll look bad on your resume and no one will hire you” idea was designed to benefit employers, not employees.

    The most consistent way people grow in their careers and increase their income is by moving to a different company. And let’s not forget the massive employment upheaval during the pandemic, career paths have become less linear for a lot of people.

    In many industries, a series of different roles over eight years isn’t a red flag at all, it’s just how careers evolve. In startups and true tech companies, for example, it’s common for people to move around: leaving for a system integrator, joining a startup, going back to a previous employer, or shifting again when a startup is acquired or fails. I’ve worked almost exclusively in startups for the past 15 years (and most of my 30-year career), and I’ve had four different roles in the past six years and I’ll probably take another one soon.

    If a career move makes sense for you, because it gives you a better culture, work environment, or work-life balance, then it’s the right move. Don’t let an arbitrary “rule” stop you from doing what’s best for you.

  6. Anonymous

    Everything you are explaining has been my gut reaction, I just wanted to get a feel for what others had to say before diving in. Thank you for your thoughtful response, it’s very helpful and validating for me!

  7. Anonymous

    I would take the one where I like the people and feel more at peace. A toxic environment will drain you fast. You'll be looking again within 6 months max.

  8. Maggie Soldano

    It sounds like you’ve already identified the trade-off:

    Current job = more stress, less cultural fit, no hybrid

    New offer = better culture, hybrid, same pay/responsibility, but another job move.

    If you're constantly trained or feeling isolated, it will show in your work and future interviews. Choosing the healthier environment sounds like the more strategic choice. If you're envision yourself staying with the new county for 3-5 ears, the job hopping will feel less relevant. Then, you can position the shorter term jobs as intentional steps toward roles witih more responsibility, better fit, or new skills. You have strong reasons for the changes you're making. Trust them!

  9. Anonymous

    This is a very helpful summary of what I’m thinking. You’re right that I should trust myself, thank you for the input!

  10. Anonymous

    Lateral moves are the best bet and mostly the only thing available in this market. You can't expect every move to be a promo or markedly more money. Adjust your expectations. Sounds like that job fits your bill best, you won't lose on salary/benefits - in this particular market, you likely won't find better.

  11. Anonymous

    I should have clarified, I’m not debating this because it’s not more money or a step up, it’s because I’m worried about my rep if I do take it, which I really want to do. I only mention the money because I know some stuffy employers might ask why I would move without a pay increase, but that isn’t really a factor for me.

  12. Anonymous

    Here are other ways to plug in that will inform your strategic planning with local government jobs. Depending on: age of the workforce at the county and retirement timing, county executive relection (depending on how this county is structured), and where the budget comes from to fund the job position - those are some areas where you could plug in and observe. These trends should be easy to find on local county websites and news outlets.

    Most government budgets are public. Follow the money, program length projections and you'll be empowered to make the best decision for you. It would benefit to read up on the county's strategic plan. Usually those are in ten year increments way ahead of time. That way, you can find high level projects and an organizational vision which will align with yours. Sometimes it's just about the paycheck or 80%, about the paycheck, with twenty percent fulfillment on the side. Good luck!

  13. Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition Specialist

    I think you've already answered your own question ----> "I’ve been searching for these people and this culture for years!!"

    Now that you've found it, you're considering passing it up for why?

    I think you've already discovered more money doesn't necessarily make you happier - nor does more responsibility.

    Your transitions don't throw up any red flags for me and if this is the good fit you seem to feel it could be, you may not be going anywhere for some time.

    This new opportunity sounds like everything you've been looking for. I'm not exactly sure what you're so torn about.

    You wrote "I know I would be so much happier there".

    If you need permission to make yourself happy - you've got it!

  14. Anonymous

    I’m most torn about my reputation. My parents worked in the corporate world and one of them with the same company for 38 years. I value their opinion and while I know their advice to stick with certain jobs a little longer is outdated, I was looking for input from those who are in the current workforce. Your post is very helpful and validating, and I do think I have my answer. Thank you!

  15. Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition Specialist

    GOOD LUCK!

  16. Paulla Fetzek, MSEd

    Hello!

    Unfortunately, you're right. Some future potential employers may look down upon the frequent moves. But in the end, if you're not happy with a job - IT IS NOT WORTH STAYING.

    Sorry to shout. But my point is, you must be happy. You're going to spend the better part of your life there. Be happy.

  17. Anonymous

    If you are in a toxic or unhealthy workplace make the move. Going laterally when this is the case is something you only have to share if someone asks why the fast move. In your exit interview you can always share with your manager how you were feeling and do so in a way to leave the door open for other upward roles where you can make changes that will shape or eliminate that culture.

    Only go if you think it will really improve your life alternatively stay and become a part of the change!

  18. Anonymous

    If it's an amazing opportunity don't think twice. It it's just meh then stay put for a better opportunity. Just don't stay out of fear.

    At the end of the day, you owe it to yourself to take care of you.

  19. Lucille Walker

    First of all, political views shouldn't be part of the workplace, and if that is the water cooler talk, it really shouldn't be happening.

    People move around on jobs a lot more than they used to. Moving from Job A to Job B seems to be the way to go to get more experience, enhance your skills and maybe get a promotion out of it too. Companies are not as loyal to those workers that stay with them like they were in the past. They are hiring and recruiting from the outside, as you see. So know that as you enter this decision, that they recruited, and they can recruit someone to replace you to.

  20. Anonymous

    You likely should go but be very careful about who you tell your reasons to. Your current employer came after you and either didn’t know or didn’t care about your beliefs. Thats a lot. And there’s always the chance that with more hires the water cooler talk will change. If you decide to go, don’t mention politics or beliefs, say hybrid as the reason.

  21. Kimberley Ferretti Hammett

    It's not as taboo as it used to be to job hop. Maybe more so in government, as it typically has more longevity, but in this market, nothing is promised anymore. Also, you could showcase this as a value-add to your resume. You are in-demand! Interview them to feel sure about this, but do what feels right for you. Your gravestone is never going to indicate how long you were loyal to a workplace.

    Also, you are being recruited, they clearly value your talent. I know gov can be more stringent on pay, but ask if there is room for negotiation there. If you have been recruited multiple times, you hold value in your field and deserve to be compensated.

    I hope it works our for you! Sounds like a great opportunity that you've earned!

  22. Anonymous

    Thank you for your encouragement and kind words, this is the kind of validation that I need right now! I truly appreciate the support and insight, this certainly helps with my decision.

  23. Anonymous

    Cultural fit is so important plus you really want a hybrid role and there are fewer being offered these days so you should seriously consider the full lifestyle benefits of this role. Conversely, from a career perspective it does not appear there is a downside in terms of what you will be doing. If you make the change, I would urge you to stay with this organization for the long haul. As you have seen, leaving for money or a promotion doesn’t outweigh culture. If you land in a great one stick with it and make your own opportunities there. Good luck! Go with your gut!

  24. Anonymous

    You've already gotten a lot of feedback but here’s my observation. My friend is 40 and changes jobs about every two - three years. One of my predecessors at my job has changed jobs about 8 times since he left.

    Oh and congrats for having built up such a good rep

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