I don't know if I am being too sensitive or if I really am walking into an issue tomorrow when I get back to work after being gone for 5 weeks with Covid.

Anonymous

October 17,2021 at 9:56PM UTC

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I don't know if I am being too sensitive or if I really am walking into an issue tomorrow when I get back to work after being gone for 5 weeks with Covid. My VP was gone for two weeks and while she was gone I came down with Covid and so did the Manager Associate. When VP came back from her trip it took her 5 days to call me. She knew how sick I was and we are very close but she has a habit of getting her nose out of joint when I am sick. (she has to do more work) When she finally called me she complained that she needed her folders completed and what was she going to do because she had 2 recruit meetings. Then she complained that we didn't have any supplies in the kitchen. I told her the only thing missing is the sugar-free hot chocolate. She said "oh". Then she said to me, "We don't have any tissue." I told her there is a case of tissue in the stock room but it isn't unpacked yet because I didn't have time my last day there. She said, "oh". It is like she is always looking for something but then when I am there she loves me up like no other. I have received so many calls and emails from so many of my co-workers telling me how much they miss me and love me.

One other thing I found out was, she emailed a few telling them that we didn't supplies. She totally threw me under the bus. I don't understand why. Like I haven't been doing my job at all. I had the office covered all but three days. I think those days we had someone there for half day. I shouldn't even have been dealing with this, I was so sick I had two days I thought I wasn't going to make it my fevers were so high and my blood pressure was so low.

I truly don't know what I am walking into tomorrow. I am so mad at her. Any suggestions on how I should deal with this?

I am still dealing with lingering Covid issues so I feel I don't need this childish behavior at all!

Thank you!!

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Lorna Rose, J.D., M.S.October 17,2021 at 10:13PM UTC
My jaw is on the floor right now. Did I really just read that you had conversations about hot chocolate and tissues while you were out sick, for over a month, with something that’s killed over 700,000 people in this country?
You need to never go back into that building (whether that’s literally or virtually). Your life means less to your boss than the paper she blows her nose with. That is intolerable, to the nth degree. I pray your symptoms go away stat, and that the best opportunity possible comes your way.
AnonymousOctober 17,2021 at 10:37PM UTC
Ditto!
I know, right?? Hot cocoa and tissues, really??!!
Hugs to you and keep us posted. I hope you feel better soon.
Covid, being sick is bad enough. You don't need the added stress of Swiss Miss and Kleenex!!
AnonymousOctober 18,2021 at 12:57AM UTC
Hello. It is illegal to discriminate against an employee for receiving treatment for COVID. I would absolutely leave now and if she tries to retaliate, take her to court. This is unacceptable.
Rae WagonerOctober 19,2021 at 2:05PM UTC
This is not helpful advice. The manager calling was unfortunate, but this answer skips all logical steps and conversations and goes straight to an attorney? Not the way to solve issues.
Nowhere in the OP’s post is there discrimination. Poor choices on the VP’s part? Sure. Childish? IMO, yes. Lawsuit material? Reason to leave a job? No.
AnonymousOctober 18,2021 at 2:19AM UTC
Stay professional and calm and let her melt down if she must.
None of this is a big deal so don't treat it as if it is. You don't have to feed into her drama. It's actually your choice.
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 12:42PM UTC
Is she a selfish and ungrateful boss?---yes
Is she insensitive to the needs of others?--yes
Don't feed into her power issues by making this more that what it is. I imagine you have dealt effectively with her behavior in the past.
Sounds like you have a wonderful work family, aside from your boss, so now you have to make a decision. Do you start looking for another job or stay. The key is not to tell others your plans because news travels fast. Just decide and move in that direction.
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 12:43PM UTC
It sounds to me like you know how to manage her. I think a lot of people here have had managers like this - creating panic where there was none to be had in the first place.
It seems the comments go in two directions - dont feed into the drama or leave and teach her a lesson. If this person isnt the only VP I'm sure the rest of upper management has taken note that your VP is falling apart without hot chocolate and tissues and you. My point: leverage the entire network in that company. You may be able to get away from her without leaving.
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 12:44PM UTC
Did this person want you to say, “yeah, sure I’ll come in with COVID to make sure you have sugar-free hot chocolate and tissues”?? Geez.
Sounds like this person is looking for problems to solve. Glad you’re on top of it. It might be beneficial for you to either see if you can transfer to a different department or look for another job. This VP sounds like a real piece of work.
And I just roll my eyes at VP types or senior executives who act all helpless with things like not being capable of getting their own beverages, tissues, etc. If they can be a VP, they can also take care of themselves.
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 12:50PM UTC
So you work for a man-child that happens to be female. I think walking off the job is a little over kill unless you hate it. You kept things running the best you could, no one was really inconvenienced, and apparently your co-workers were able to pick up some of the slack. I would just ignore her tantrums. If she brings up a speific issue, address it calmly. If this is typical behavior then you are use to it, if it is atypical, then when things are "back to normal" discuss the problems with her. Is she usualy helpless? Does she totally depend on you? If so, then you also need to discuss with her the protocol for when you are sick or out of the office for more than a day or two.
Sorry for my disjointed thoughts on this.
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 1:14PM UTC
I agree with the others, I think you are managing her just fine, but I have a few points to share for future reference.
1. Do not answer when she calls. Return the call on your convenience so you have an opportunity to screen the level of importance via voicemail (and also document her silly requests during your COVID absence)
2. When I worked a similar position, I had a folder of procedures and tasks I performed and how to complete. This way when I was out, I could direct someone to those instructions and only answer minute questions when required. If you haven't yet prepared something similar - do that!
3. Maintain boundaries for yourself.
Glad you are feeling better though not back to 100%. It's important you discuss your current state (lingering fatigue, etc.) with your healthcare provider so that they may convey it to your HR department appropriately and you can hopefully avoid any negative repercussions performing your duties.
CathyOctober 19,2021 at 2:17PM UTC
?
AnonymousOctober 20,2021 at 12:36PM UTC
What part don't you understand?
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 1:25PM UTC
This is a terribly mean, horrible thing for me to even think, but in some odd way, I wish you would have dragged yourself in with a box of Swiss Miss, coughed (into a mask, I’m not pondering murder) and handed it to her. I do think the pandemic has made us all a little crazy and certainly at our wit’s end to things. I really hope you feel better soon. My husband had a boss like this.
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 1:34PM UTC
Work with your HR team to get an accommodation to deal with your remaining COVID symptoms. This is why we have the ADA. Maybe your Dr. suggests a slow ramp up to full time work, or extra breaks during the day. Good luck
DianOctober 19,2021 at 9:40PM UTC
Make sure to get FMLA set up too in case you have to miss work intermittently with your remaining symptoms.
Focused721350October 19,2021 at 1:40PM UTC
Good Morning,
WHY???? If your out sick from work why bother with these people. YOUR SICK!!!! REST!!! LET THEM WORRY ABOUT ALL THE NONSENSE!!! Who cares what others think! You know you do your job.. Besides! Work and personal is different. She seems nice to you because you DO EVERYTHING!!!! Go back like your the STRONG person that YOU ARE!!! Stop!!!! sweating things that might not be....
Good luck and God Bless... ;)
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 3:37PM UTC
My smart mouth would get me in trouble, but if my boss (knowing I'm out sick) called me with such crap, my reply would be along the lines of , "What are you, 4? Do you need your mommy to come in and find the tissues & cocoa for you?"
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 3:38PM UTC
If you were out for 5 weeks with covid then you shouldn't have been working in the office - either someone else there needed to cover for you or they could have hired a temp to fill in until you were healthy and able to safely return to the office. Don't sweat it, this isn't your problem.
Renee Radcliff SinclairOctober 19,2021 at 5:02PM UTC
Well, if she needs to vent, let her vent. Then I would quietly say something like, "I had COVID and was out recovering. As you know, because the virus is so, ahem, viral, I really could not, and should not, have been in the office during those five weeks. I didn't plan to get COVID, but I did. I'm ready to move on from it. Can we do that?" Take care of yourself!
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 6:50PM UTC
Honestly, I have very little sympathy for people who have been out of work for extended periods of time due to COVID. If you are vaccinated it is very unlikely that you will get sick enough to be out for FIVE weeks. I would be really upset too having to do extra work because somebody actively chose to not take preventive measures against being out of the office for that long. I just had to miss 5 days of work because my son's preschool teacher tested positive for COVID, so we had to all quarantine. After my initial concern for everybody's health, I was mostly just irritated that other people's inability to protect themselves and their community has led to decreased productivity and making me look unreliable to my own boss.
This was preventable. Please people, get vaccinated! If for no other reason than to not be sick for 5 weeks. There is no reason to expect your coworkers to not have a problem with this situation.
Rae WagonerOctober 19,2021 at 7:22PM UTC
My goodness. I didn’t see anywhere that the OP stated whether she was vaxxed or not, but regardless WE ARE IN A GLOBAL PANDEMIC. There are breakthrough cases all the time, and regardless of what illness the OP had, sick is sick!
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 8:23PM UTC
Yes..agree. regardless..sick is sick
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 11:05PM UTC
Sure, but at some point our employers don't need to accept that somebody is out for 5 weeks when they COULD have been out for 2 if they'd been vaccinated. They don't need to disclose if they are vaccinated; the length and severity of OPs illness did that for her.
AnonymousOctober 20,2021 at 7:52AM UTC
You are what’s wrong with this society. Now I believe everyone should be vaccinated if they don’t have underlying conditions. I also believe there is a problem with these anti-vaxxers and they all should go live away from other people. I’m a 4 time cancer survivor with a comprised immune system and my body has a hard time with vaccines . But my doctor thought it best I was vaccinated for COVID. My point here is everyone is different. Yes the anti-vaxxers are group by themselves. But you jumping on this person not knowing her situation puts you in same group as these anti-vaxxers. Take a good look in the mirror
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 8:22PM UTC
It didn't state if she had been vaccinated or not..Colin Powell was vaccinated and just DIED from COVID related complications..that being said..I believe that the vaccine generally reduces the severity of the disease and yes..I'm vaccinated..
AnonymousOctober 19,2021 at 11:01PM UTC
I'm assuming OP isn't 84 years old. Colin Powell may not have had a robust immune response in the first place as our immune systems don't respond to vaccines as well as we age. Perhaps she has severe underlying health conditions, but going by statistical likelihood, I'm going to assume that anybody sick enough from COVID to be unable to work for five weeks is unvaccinated. A person doesn't have to disclose their vaccination status for that to be obvious.
Brenda CarlsonOctober 20,2021 at 12:20AM UTC
So, you have a medical degree? You are making an awful lot of assumptions. Additionally, on the vax issue: some people cannot take the vax due to medical issues. In my own family, the household member that was vaccinated actually got Covid worse than the one that did not. Sick is sick, regardless of the cause.
AnonymousOctober 20,2021 at 1:20AM UTC
Your own family is statistical insignificant. I understand how math and science work. There are a lot of educational backgrounds that teach scientific literacy outside of an MD.
AnonymousOctober 20,2021 at 3:30AM UTC
You do realize that not everyone can take the vaccination.
I've been told by my primary physician not to have the vaccination because I'm allergic to some of the ingredients in it - so it's not a matter of not wanting it, it's a matter of me going into anaphylactic shock if I do.
I do everything else I can to be healthy... I go to work and am in an office by myself and then I come home, and I wear my mask. I don't even grocery shop right now, I order online and have my kid go pick it up for me, since I don't want to increase my likelihood of getting COVID.
Yet, I still have to deal with people like you whom seem to think I need to be steamrolled into getting the COVID vaccination for their benefit even if it harms me.
Yeah, no. Not happening.
AnonymousOctober 20,2021 at 1:55PM UTC
I totally understand that some people cannot get vaccinated. That is why it is so important for the rest of us to be. You are doing it right! You are doing everything you can to not spread illness and not get sick yourself. Clearly this person did not since they ended up sick with a preventable disease for five weeks. I would feel the same way if a coworker was out for that long with the flu after refusing a flu shot. IF they've done their best, they wore a mask and got vaccinated and avoided other sick people and still got sick then and only then will I feel sympathy and not like they brought it upon themselves. Sorry you took my comment personally. I feel fatigued as somebody who is also doing everything I can to avoid getting sick that other people just can't also do their best. If they don't want to get vaccinated or can't (which are very few people who have legit allergies to the ingredients), stay home, WEAR A MASK, do curb side pick up, whatever you need to do to avoid getting sick. If you get sick it is always the fault of SOMEBODY being irresponsible and I'm sick of it.
AnonymousOctober 20,2021 at 10:18PM UTC
Absolutely! I know many people in your shoes (allergies or have had Guillane-Barre Syndrome) as well as friends who have tried the vaccines but don’t make antibodies, often because they just underwent chemotherapy.
This is exactly why I feel the rest of us must get vaccinated- to protect you & the other groups I referenced. I hope & pray you stay healthy.
Chivo RamirezOctober 20,2021 at 3:37AM UTC
I had COVID last January, I was sick for about two and a half weeks, since I work out a lot I was lucky I was out for that long. I also got vaccinated last May. It made me sick for about a day.
Now, let me say this; the vaccine has serious issues, I know 2 people that were vaccinated but got sick, the reason why politicians push mandates is because they are getting financial kickbacks, besides that, if you are so confident about the program, you should be alright, even if others are not vaccinated, The vaccines have serious flaws, not enough tests is one of them.
AnonymousOctober 20,2021 at 5:50AM UTC
You are misinformed. Check the facts and medical evidence and advice from around the workd. The vaccine will protect you and your loved ones from serious illness or death.
Madam anon663October 20,2021 at 8:23AM UTC
I work in pharma, and what you are saying is blatantly false. Please do some research other than Facebook, and educate yourself instead of sounding like a conspiracy theorist.
AnonymousOctober 20,2021 at 11:19AM UTC
Colin Powell just died from a breakthrough case of COVID. He was fully vaccinated. Losing all empathy for others is not the solution.
April GolowicOctober 19,2021 at 8:18PM UTC
She shouldn't have been bothering you when you were sick..that's ridiculous and probably not even legal? If I were you I would get a Dr 's note for limited duty until you actually feel better..this is too much stress to have to endure after being so sick..put your health first
AnonymousOctober 20,2021 at 1:34AM UTC
Were you on FMLA or short term disability or anything like that? In my company if you are taking covid leave you are expected to still work remotely, so was there an expectation that you would still be working? Is it part of your regular job duties to make sure the office and kitchen supplies are stocked? If I needed to know where these things were at my office, I would ask the person who normally takes care of those things even if they were working remotely that day. I think it's possible you're being sensitive, but I also don't know the entire story if this person is actually being childish or just expecting your job to still be done so she can do hers.
GirlBossanova518083October 20,2021 at 3:47AM UTC
You are not being overly sensitive. Any type of illness (covid or not) sometimes takes more than 2 weeks to get better. Many bosses get grumpy when their go-to rockstar isn't available. But unfortunately, when you go in next, you have to grin and bear it. When your boss gets sick in the future, she won't like the interruptions. Good luck!
Nirupama RaghavanOctober 21,2021 at 9:06AM UTC
You are not being overly sensitive. Your boss should not have bothered you while you were out sick over something that could have been resolved by a quick order on Instacart. Calling someone when they are sick (if you do it at all) should be about checking in on their health, though I would make allowances for a real emergency, which office supplies are not.
If there is a robust feedback mechanism in your company, it might be advisable to set some better boundaries with her. Otherwise, I've heard it's a good job market out there...