After three years of being at my current job, I feel like I am stuck in a place I was in ten years ago.

4 Comments

1. Kerry RoperApril 1,2025 at 1:31PM UTC

   Start by taking stock of all of your skills and figuring out which ones are marketable or “of value” to employers. What are YOUR interests, what are you good at? My dad always said “you need to become an expert at something/anything by the time you’re 30!” . This is very true and in that time frame usually we discover more about what we DONT want to do. Find out what skills are required by employers you’d like to work for. Then, make goals to find out how to learn these skills. I did some bookkeeping for my close aunt in my late teens for “party money”, and later when the PC became crucial in the bookkeeping and accounting field, I went to PC and Quicken (a very old accounting program) classes with that same aunt, as she was in her 30s and we decided to learn about PCs and she paid me to stay and learn the accounting program in order to help her learn. Once I was in my twenties, I had lived in Boston, and worked as a nanny, as a nightclub barback, at a vintage thrift store, and learned about what I was good at and what I didn’t want to do. I met a guy, when I had been working for a thrift store that was opening a location right near our apartment. The manager saw I was young and driven and good at some leadership, he had been staffing the big store, and he needed help hiring and training people for the front of store, the back of store, where the donations were sorted and priced (my roommate was placed in charge of the misc and furniture departments), then we needed to vet and hire truck drivers and donation pickup crews, I was tasked with calling the city to find out the rules about background checks and how to adhere to them, we needed a staff of ten telemarketers who were able to work from home within set hours, given weekly lists of phone numbers that we issued (and paid for) that listed phone numbers of people in set neighborhoods, and streets, asking if they had donations and how to donate clothing and small appliances and house wares. Furniture could be picked up by letting the marketer know, and they’d arrange a day and timeframe. This was my college education. It just so happened my friends and roommates were also attending BU, and other actual colleges at the same time. I learned to staff people and how to use a new spreadsheet program called lotus 123, which predated Excel. I had gained all of these new skills at this position, but I was still being paid close to minimum wage. My manager hired an assistant manager. We hit it off, and she made me aware of my situation. lol! She helped me write my first professional resume. I had no choice but to leave that job, let it go to the next person, I figured and let them grow as much as I had. This all took place in about a year- btw. When I told my boss I had received an offer for a bookkeeping office manager role, earning nearly double, he was thrilled for me but sad to see me go. I know now, that he was used to very high turnover with the stores he managed. They hired a lot of people in drug and alcohol treatment programs, etc allowing them to start their lives over.

   I hope you can find that first job that gives back to you as much as you give to it. You get out of life only as much as you put in. That daughter must be encouragement enough and added to the love and respect shown to YOURSELF is an example every day to her.

2. Danielle Peterson, MBAApril 8,2025 at 3:25PM UTC

   Others have already left good advice. I would ad that there are a lot of low-cost and sometimes subsidized training programs out there. Figure out what you enjoy and have an aptitude for, then get training and certifications in that (or those) area(s). That will help you get closer to a job that is more rewarding, financially and generally. And you’ll feel empowered as you take action to work towards your goals.

3. Tina MorenoApril 1,2025 at 2:12PM UTC

   First, I just want to acknowledge how hard this must feel. You’ve been holding so much together for so long, and that deserves recognition. It’s not easy to juggle work, parenting, and a home that doesn’t feel like home—all while trying to stay hopeful for something better.

   Three years at the same job is meaningful. It shows commitment and reliability. But now might be the right time to ask yourself a few key questions:

   Is the work environment healthy and supportive?
   Are you being paid fairly compared to others in similar roles in your area (beyond just minimum wage)?
   Are you still growing—or are you just getting by?

   Even if the answer isn’t clear right away, just asking those questions can help you start to find a direction forward. You mentioned feeling stuck in a place that feels like a step backward—but the truth is, you're not where you were 10 years ago. You’ve learned, endured, raised your daughter, and made it through one of the hardest economic and social periods in modern history. That matters.

   If you’re unsure of how to move forward, start by looking at what skills you already have that are marketable. What are you good at? What do people come to you for help with at work? Are there areas in your current role where you could take on more or learn something new—whether that’s customer service, operations, scheduling, or something else? On-the-job learning is valuable and often overlooked.

   Once you identify a few areas of strength or interest, explore free online resources to build them up. Websites like Coursera, edX, and even YouTube have high-quality content that won’t cost you a dime. This way, you're planting seeds for your next opportunity—even while staying employed.
   And about your home—I totally understand how much our environment affects our mood and motivation. Even if it’s temporary, I believe in finding little ways to make a space your own. A lamp from the thrift store, a small plant, rearranging furniture—these aren’t just decorative. They’re reminders that you still have agency. That you can make changes, even if they’re small, even if they’re slow.

   I’ve had times where I had to stretch every dollar, too. Heck, I rented a room for seven years before getting into a nice shared space with roommates. But what helped me was shifting from focusing on what I didn’t have to what I did—even if it was just the roof over my head or the quiet strength that helped me get through the day. Every small action toward your future counts. You’re not going backwards—you’re just in the middle of the journey. And forward is still happening, even if it doesn’t always feel that way.

   You're not alone in this. Keep going. You’re closer than you think. ?

4. Carlene NicholsApril 8,2025 at 2:22PM UTC

   I started out as a nurse’s aide. When I decided I wanted more money, I went back to school to become an LVN. Down the road, I went back to school to become an RN. All while working and being a single Mom. Vocational Schools and Community Colleges are all about adults advancing their education and careers.