How do you deal with bullied when you work in HR?

11 Comments

1. Lisa OGradyApril 22,2025 at 12:40PM UTC

   Do you mean dealing with bullies for employees or being bullied yourself by someone else?

2. AnonymousApril 22,2025 at 12:47PM UTC

   Like anywhere else. You have a clear definition of bullying (this can be radically different depending on who is defining the act and resulting results). Then meticulous documentation, reporting process ans escalation with consequences. You must have a policy that augments your harassment policy and follows the law. These days "toxic" and "bullying" are popular descriptors but few companies have taken the time to understand the need for well formed policy and legal guidelines that can help define the acts and draw legal reactions.

   Without clear definitions and communication with clear consequences. Really it's a free for all for both employees and managers.

3. AnonymousApril 22,2025 at 4:45PM UTC

   I learned that what a person considers bullying and how the law views it are very different. Trying to prove it was happening to me proved impossible. I ended up being fired for going to HR and leadership too often about a favored employee.

4. AnonymousApril 22,2025 at 12:53PM UTC

   Document the acts and follow the law of harassment and safety in the workplace. Contact an employment attorney who is well versed in workplace abuse.

   Everyone defines this behavior differently. Most of what is categorized as bullying is not illegal and the word is just a catch all for bad behavior.

5. AnonymousApril 22,2025 at 1:10PM UTC

   Exactly!

6. Melissa WatersApril 22,2025 at 3:21PM UTC

   This site will help you if you have questions or not sure of the type of behavior/bullying.

   www.stopbullying.gov

7. Paulla Fetzek, MSEdApril 22,2025 at 1:00PM UTC

   All states have laws governing bullying int he workplace - both if you're observing it, or the victim of it. As such, companies should have a policy in affect as well. Some may consider there to be varying degrees or different "types" of bullying. But in the end, it's all wrong.

   From your post I don't know if you're in HR and someone is coming to you about bullying, or if you're saying that someone in HR is bullying you.

   If it's the former, check your policies and state's rules.

   If it's the latter - is it the HR manager? If so, go to someone higher up if you can. If it's someone else in the department, report the person to your HR manager.

   Workplace bullying is never ok. But, I will say that it may be the person you see as the offender - it wasn't their intention to bully. I'm not downplaying your concern. But in all fairness, you do need to review the situation for intent.

   All the best...

8. Colleen HansonApril 22,2025 at 1:10PM UTC

   Could you please clarify the situation a bit more? Its unclear as to whether you personally are being bullied or if you are asking how to deal with an employee that is bullying others.

   If it is the later, the best results I have seen have come when the bully is put on a PIP (if there is clear proof of the bullying). Most office bullies like to think they are in "control" and no one will do anything. Once the ball drops on them I have noticed one of two things happening; they either get on board and check their attitude or many simply move on to another company and start their bullying all over again.

   If you are personally being bullied and work in HR, it is probably best to go to the CEO or as I have seen in the past, if the CEO is doing the bullying, it's best to move on.

9. AnonymousApril 22,2025 at 7:14PM UTC

   I'm being bullied. I was called out in front of everyone.

10. AnonymousApril 24,2025 at 12:02PM UTC

    What is your definition of being bullied? And is it by someone else in HR? Do you have clear examples, documentation, witnesses? Do you have a whistleblower hotline or a colleague or your boss's boss you are comfortable having a conversation with without fear of retaliation? That is a tough one, if you are indeed being bulled and you are in HR.

11. Lilye Stallworth ChaffinApril 24,2025 at 4:40PM UTC

    Document, and let them know you’re documenting. BCC upper management in correspondence.