Vacation time away was the clarity I needed to make the move.

Anonymous

May 3,2022 at 12:44AM UTC

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Vacation time away was the clarity I needed to make the move. It's a blessing to know but now I don't want to return to the office!

A few months ago I posted about deciding whether or not to leave my job. Some of you suggested waiting until after my vacation to reassess the situation. It's now obvious that I need to leave.

I'm actually feeling sick to return to work tomorrow. It's not the usual after vacation blues but I'm so stressed about returning to work that my time away seems to be a distant memory.

I've updated my resume, contacted my LinkedIn connections and I'm committed to finding a new position. While I'm prioritizing job searching, I'm unsure of how to deal with this foreboding feeling that I can't work in that office. I don't have a poker face and I'm not sure how to fake that I want to be there.

Since the job searching can take a long time, does anyone have any advice regarding how to stay motivated while continuing to work in toxic environment? Every day after work, I'm always so mentally exhausted that I'm worried that it's going to affect interviewing and be able to find a new position.

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SamanthaMay 3,2022 at 1:05AM UTC
It sounds like you work in an office, but if there anyway you can work remotely? I'm in a very similar situation and working from home has allowed me to make it a lot more bearable. I am working 8 hours, not really anymore. I'm continuing to do my job, I'm not doing quite the bare minimum, but I know I'm not doing my best- It just sucks. But I think the thought of getting out is a relief and it's helpful to get you through.
I wish you a lot of luck!
AnonymousMay 3,2022 at 1:45AM UTC
Pace yourself to complete your work, know work will always be there the next day, sign off at the end of the day.
AnonymousMay 3,2022 at 1:56AM UTC
Keep perspective. You've last this long so you cam do whatever is best for you and your family. You may really want out but that just means you wasted too much time there. That's all. Don't create madness where there is none.
Bide your time, make careful choices and keep your head straight. It might take a few months to find the right fit. Don't rush things because you're restless. Keep your eye on the prize. You want to leave on your terms for your great offer. Not melt down and make the wrong choices.
The way you make "in the meantime" work is you use this time fir you. Clean up your desk, get things updated, be professional. Make sure to use your benefits for things like dental visits, doctors annual visits, get a new vision checkup. Once you start a new job you won't want to try and take cram those selfcare appointments into your first 3 months. You'll want to focus on your new responsibilities. So why not do so now.
Also, take care to exercise, eat well and pamper yourself. You want to be fresh and well rested for your search.
So be smart and don't allow yourself to sabotage your plan by getting too anxious and discontent. This is your longterm plan to be successful and land several great offers and glide into your next role with aplomb. That takes patience, strategy and clarity.
AnonymousMay 3,2022 at 2:54AM UTC
It's not going to set a very good precedent for you getting a better job. The easiest time I had job searching was when I spent NO TIME worrying about getting a job. I was on vacation, and I knew I would have something by the time I got back. And I did! I had two job offers and had to pick.
AnonymousMay 3,2022 at 4:06AM UTC
I'm sorry. Is staying the right solution? Your current job could be a barrier... your lifestyle can be a barrier... things that bring down your mood are the biggest barriers to feeling confident and like the best candidate. No one else's opinion matters really. Only you know what you're supposed to be doing next.
AnonymousMay 3,2022 at 3:31PM UTC
Thank you, all! I appreciate your ideas especially taking time to care for myself. Going to the doctor, dentist and other appointments that I haven't used as it's been so demanding at work. I have that time and should take advantage of before starting a new job.
I was searching before leaving for vacation but I'm in an area that doesn't have a lot of jobs. It's a niche small town that unlike the rest of the US, doesn't have a lot availability or is in a specialized field like healthcare.
I was fortunate to find an interim position after relocating during the pandemic. That being said, it's proving difficult to job search as my background doesn't match openings.
I've looked into remote work but my 10 plus years of experience lends itself to marketing, events and partnerships that requires at least a hybrid role. I'm open to relocating, but the positions that I apply for out-of-state or in another area, I hear radio silence.
My worry is that I'm going to get stuck here and in this role since there are limited jobs available. When something does open up in my field, people that are in higher positions are applying in order to make a move that would otherwise be my level. With their experience, they are getting those jobs and due to salary, I can't go too much lower in order to pay bills.
I appreciate the positive energy, ideas and ways to stay motivated while finding the right job! This is a learning curve as before the pandemic, I was in larger cities that catered to my experience.
When there are limited jobs to apply for, I know it's going to take longer to find the right role. I'll keep trying and plugging away to make it work. You helped change my mindset.