I’ve decided to leave.

Anonymous

July 26,2022 at 10:22AM UTC

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I’ve decided to leave. I don’t want to tell my current company where I’m going.

I started a new job about two months ago and quickly realized it was a mistake. This is the most toxic, poorly run company I’ve ever worked at. I have an offer to go back to my old job and I’m probably going to take it. I’ve decided to put in my two-week notice on Friday.

I do not want to tell anyone where I’m going. I’m ok with mentioning the general industry, and I’ll just say I’m going to a startup in that industry, but I do not want to tell anyone the name of my company. My current manager already knows the name (she asked me once before I started) but I don’t know if she remembers it. The reason I don’t want to tell anyone is because there are people on this team who gossip, lie on customers, and have shown themselves to be nosy and untrustworthy. I wish I could annul this job from my work experience.

Could you please share any thoughts on what to say when people start pushing me to tell them where I’m going? Right now I want to say, “I’m going back to my previous company” and if they ask where that is, I’ll just say “it’s a small startup” and leave it at that without naming names. If they continue to push (I suspect at least one person who has already crossed my boundaries will do that) what else can I say to shut down the conversation? Thanks so much for any advice!

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AnonymousJuly 26,2022 at 12:42PM UTC
Where you are going is none of your current employer's business, so you are not obligated to say anything.
-You can change the subject.
-Be direct and say that is info you do not care to share.
- Mention just the industry and change the subject to stop further inquiries.
Personally, I do not share that info and have established personal info-sharing boundaries long before the question is asked. That doesn't mean alienating people. It just means certain pieces of info are off-limits.
Georgene HuangJuly 26,2022 at 12:51PM UTC
You could try asking them in return, "Is there a reason you need to know now? I understand you're curious but soon enough it will be clear and I'd rather talk about it when things are finalized."
Cyndi RosenblattJuly 26,2022 at 12:55PM UTC
1) It's probably not hard for them to track down where you used to work via Google, even if you don't have a LinkedIn account, so I wouldn't even say that much if you really don't want them to know ahead of time (can't prevent them from looking afterwards if anyone feels that strongly about it).
2) It sounds like you aren't concerned about burning bridges, so just say, "I don't care to talk about it. I need to get back to work now/About that report... " Then walk away or change the subject if you were speaking to them about work-related topics in the first place.
Them asking once is collegial and pretty normal. Anyone pushing once you state it's not a welcome topic of conversation is being rude. Women are often conditioned to be polite in the face of rude or inappropriate behavior and sometimes we need "permission" to stand our ground. I give you permission!
Good luck with your next role.
Erin A.July 26,2022 at 1:20PM UTC
1) You could presumably leave this company off your resume. I don't know if people are too concerned about a 2 month gap.
2) They will find out if they really want to, so if you're concerned about them lying to customers, etc., you could use this 2 weeks to control your own narrative.
At the end of the day, you're close to being done with them, so just hang on and try not to burn any bridges.
AnonymousJuly 26,2022 at 2:29PM UTC
I always say I will update my LinkedIn profile when I've decided.
Anne KrookJuly 26,2022 at 4:22PM UTC
"I'll let people know when it is public," which, conveniently, can be never
Monica Lynn SadlerJuly 26,2022 at 4:26PM UTC
You don't owe anyone an answer as to where you are going. That's your personal business and no one else's. As other have said, it's ok to say, "Respectfully, I'm keeping it to myself". PERIOD! Don't say "period", but you get my meaning. LOL! Walk away and make no apologies for being private. And I agree with whomever said you don't need to add your current company to your resume. You were only there for 2 weeks. I wouldn't sweat it. God bless you. You're in my prayers. It shall be well. :)
AnonymousJuly 26,2022 at 4:29PM UTC
After working there for only 2 months, why would you list it on a resume?
Erica MitchellJuly 26,2022 at 5:45PM UTC
You are under no obligation to tell anyone where you're going. You can just say I've found a better fit.
Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition SpecialistJuly 26,2022 at 11:34PM UTC
You can say it's not finalized yet and you don't want to jinx it. You can say "I'd rather not say". There are lots of things you can say - you're under no obligation to share any more info than you're comfortable sharing.
Didn't you use a resume to apply for your current position? Wasn't your former/future company's name on there? If so, I should think they can find out the name if they want to. Also LinkedIn if you're on there.
Dawn S. CrossJuly 27,2022 at 11:47AM UTC
You don’t “owe” it to your soon to be former company (or those you work with) to say where you are going.
A simple “thank you, but I prefer not to say” if asked is ok.
When turning in your resignation do the same. “Thank you for the opportunity to work here. I have learned many things from my time with (company name). Effective (date) will be my last day with (company).”
Remember, no IS a complete sentence.
Maria VierbickasJuly 27,2022 at 12:33PM UTC
you are under no obligation to say where you are going to your employer or coworkers. If you pressed, I would simply say you would like to keep it confidential for now until after you start or something like that. Stay strong and don't let them bully a name out of you, it's none of their business.
Stephanie IngleJuly 27,2022 at 1:11PM UTC
We've had a few people leave who said they would be happy to share that info once they have fully left the current company. Or say you think it will jinx it! It's not their business. I hate people that pry, boo...
Ellen Smith FaganAugust 3,2022 at 12:58PM UTC
If you are so unhappy at that job then you owe them no explanation and when they ask you about the new job simply reply “I shouldn’t say “
Monica HilgenbergAugust 3,2022 at 1:50PM UTC
You don't actually owe anyone any information. You are not required to even tell them you have another job. If this company and the folks there are as toxic as you are describing I wouldn't give them anything at all.
AnonymousAugust 6,2022 at 12:44PM UTC
Why troubling your mind on someone who is not your employer . Just tell them when they inquire that you will let them know where you are going once you are settled , and once settled don't even bother yourself to devaulge any information to any one . People are evil. Do not trust anyone , but love ...