I started a new job in which I absolutely love.

Dorice Timmons

September 28,2021 at 9:42AM UTC

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I started a new job in which I absolutely love. It is a Christian based foster support. I felt like it was my calling. I work in a 3 person finance department. I'm in my 4th week. My boss is awesome. We have morning meetings and I love this. My co-worker though is very rude. She does not speak to me directly unless she is showing me how to do something "correctly". I've worked in Accounting for 25 years. I know how to file - most recent to the front. She does not speak when she arrives...I always say Good Morning and Good night to everyone. She does not look at me when speaking. She is very rude. I don't want to deal with office politics. She does not act this way with others in the office. How do I break the ice? I don't want this to become a problem for this job. I love it there. Help me get through.

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AnonymousSeptember 28,2021 at 10:07AM UTC
If it's you she's rude to, I'd take her advice with a grain of salt. Tell her "thanks". Also, Good Morning, Good Night are fine. I'd keep interaction to a minimum
Maybe after be being there awhile, try lunch.
She's either intimidated by you or simply somewhat abrasive
Id be decent and neutral. If you hang out with others, invite her. If she declines, you tried. Maybe try again in the near future?
Enjoy your career there. But you are NOT responsible for her happiness
AnonymousSeptember 28,2021 at 11:16AM UTC
It's possible she's not happy there. Or going through some very difficult personal issues.
Nevertheless continue with your manners and positive work ethic. Don't stop because of her. Dont pursue her unless its work related.
Like someone else mentioned, you can invite her to lunch or coffee, but if she declines, take it as a signal she doesn't want to interact with you, for now.
A lot of work issues are relationship issues. Think about it.
Most of the posts here are under career advice and work dilemmas are actually about relationships.
Interrelationship problems are what make working environments great or horrible.
It's hard, I know. It's a challenge, to focus on work and yourself, when you want to get along with your colleagues.
It's also unnatural to ignore rude behavior and not take to heart when you feel unwelcome with a person you will spend most of your days with.
My advice, do not latch on to your colleagues or people at work for your strength. Latch on to God.
Tiana MumfordSeptember 28,2021 at 12:08PM UTC
First,
Congrats! That’s a tough one if I did not know better I would think she is jealous or intimidated by you . If it’s a Christian base company and that’s what you believe I would pray for her and if you are led to speak with her in private woman to woman . No one wants to come to a new job in a hostile environment!
Kendra PhelpsSeptember 28,2021 at 12:26PM UTC
Honestly I would leave her be. As long as she is showing you or speaking to you about work expect that and continue to do your job. Remember co workers are not your friends and we just have to tolerate each other to complete the task at hand.
AnonymousSeptember 28,2021 at 1:28PM UTC
Some folks don't react well with a change in group dynamics. It upsets the status quo and it threatens them fir all sorts of personal reasons that have nothing to do with you. You have no idea what has happened prior to your arrival. They may have been turned down for a promotion or maybe your job or maybe a raise was denied. Perhaps the boss sang your praises before you started and she got jealous or felt overlooked. It could be so many things. She may just take time to warm up to you. Who knows.
Just be professional and give it time and a lot of space. You will learn more as things settle down. Be polite and open. You'll be fine. And please don't jump to the conclusion that this will somehow jeopardize your job. That kind of thinking is not going to help you on any front.
Dorice TimmonsSeptember 29,2021 at 9:28PM UTC
Thank you for this. I needed it.