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I have a friend with strong industry connections who’s personally handed my resume to decision-makers a few times.

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Anonymous

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I have a friend with strong industry connections who’s personally handed my resume to decision-makers a few times. The first was for a new corporate team — the CMO liked my background, shared it with her team, and I had an exploratory call that went well but led nowhere. She also passed my resume to another department head who seemed interested but never followed up.

Then she gave it to a local exec who literally handed it to the Mayor, which got me an interview for a new government position. It felt purely obligatory — no real questions, just small talk and “we’ll be in touch.” Never heard back.

Here’s the issue: these are the only interviews I’ve gotten, and my friend has gone above and beyond to help me. I’m wondering if I should start applying through official channels so I’m seen as a legit candidate, not just someone she’s doing a favor for. I also worry she thinks I’m blowing these interviews since she was hired through her network — and in this market, it really is about who you know.

I’d really appreciate constructive advice, not “what you should’ve done.” Second-guessing doesn’t help — I’m just trying to figure out my next best move.

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  1. Anonymous

    It sounds like you have a really good friend to help you. Yes, apply directly. Also consider all types of roles and companies that use your skills. If you know people at the companies, of course ask if they can help you navigate the process, understand the culture, and introduce you to people in their subset.

    Find a recruiting firm. It's not always about who you know but what you can do for the firm in the form of driving revenue and bringing in new customers.

    The hidden job market is interesting and is not always about who you know but what you bring to the table and who is talking about your achievements. Sometimes it has to be you directly.

  2. Anonymous

    Thank you so much! I feel bad bc she offered to pass along the resume w/out my asking. So, I had my resume handed to the top of the food chain on a silver platter twice and couldn't close the deal.

  3. Anonymous

    When you see another job apply first and then ask for her help. She can tell the person that she knows that you are already a candidate that will let the job know that you are interested and her support will be another thing that moves you forward, not the only thing.

  4. Anonymous

    I appreciate the response! As I mentioned to the previous responder, she offered to pass my resume along bc of who she knew and the positions they were looking to fill. This is actually the company she works for, and knew I was looking. I hadn't thought about applying to the company until she asked for my resume. Same thing with Gov't job - she offered as she knew someone.

  5. Anonymous

    Most organizations have formal application processes, take the path of least resistance and apply through regular channels. Don’t make it difficult for these people to get you into the screening process. No one wants to follow up to tell you to apply. As the other poster said, apply first then ask for her help to back channel your candidacy.

  6. Anonymous

    Thank you - I appreciate the response! To be clear, she offered to pass my resume along bc of who she knew and the positions they were looking to fill. It's a major U.S. company, so she wanted to get me to the top of the resume pile. I will apply on the site to see what happens. Thanks again!

  7. Catharine S

    The next time she passes your resume onto someone, make sure you also apply via their formal application process. Even if there is no specific job opening, most systems will let you submit a resume for future opportunities. It might be that you get "lost" because you are not in the digital system.

  8. Anonymous

    I've been in the workforce for 25+ years. I'm well aware of "how it works", thanks. Had you read my responses to similar feedback, you would know that my friend is at an executive level and requested my resume so she could pass it along to her counterparts, in case anything was open. Perhaps you are employed, but I've "put in effort" to the tune of 200+ job listings, as have the majority of job seekers in this market. Perhaps you misread my post - it IS who you know, networking and connecting with others, not blindly filling out applications. I happen to have a close friend who knows my experience and offered to help me get my resume in the right hands without my asking. In closing, I come to this site for advice and to provide the knowledge I have to those also looking for advice. You seem to assume I'm a 25-year-old who thinks someone is coming to save me. Not only are you devoid of empathy and the willingness to help others, but you also think your "tough love" words will help anyone struggling in this job market. Perhaps reflect on your style of "advice" and who it's helping.

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