Passive Candidate

17 Comments

1. AnonymousAugust 10,2024 at 7:30PM UTC

   Yes. Just say "like I'm sure you do, I stay open to speak with people when approached with opportunities. I think that it's professionally savvy don'tyou?"

   You don't provide details, frequency or whether or not you are currently considering an opportunity. That is none of her business.

   By engaging inclusively, you are putting yourself on equal footing and providing a common sense reply while revealing nothing of substance.

2. Wanda ShawAugust 10,2024 at 9:58PM UTC

   Very well put!

3. AnonymousAugust 10,2024 at 11:37PM UTC

   OP. Practicing now. Thank you!

4. AnonymousAugust 10,2024 at 8:45PM UTC

   I like what the other person said, but I will add that it is dangerous to be too friendly with the boss and oversharing. It has bit my behind more times than I care to think about when something comes back from a "skip manager" about something I thought was said in confidence. Disparaging the company with the boss is never a good idea, even when it is obvious or warranted. I am convinced that once my boss ratted me out or we were caught on surveillance. Those were the only two options that made sense.

5. AnonymousAugust 11,2024 at 1:32PM UTC

   Great advice on relationship with boss or any coworkers. You never know and you hope you have good judgment because it is so important that there be people we can trust in our lives. I have a coworker is thinks they are amazing but they are self centered and self aggrandizing. It is almost comical but some insecure leaders see it as a positive.

6. AnonymousAugust 11,2024 at 6:07PM UTC

   I think the response is I get many reach outs on LI as I am sure that you do as well. If there is relevance to the content of what they are pitching to me I always listen as I like to be aware of what is happening in the market and often I can send referrals to them from my network. I like to be a good citizen to those with whom I have connected because it uplifts others to share new opportunities. Stop there. Feel free to share word for word. My version responds in a kind way but acknowledges nothing. As for the company that you spoke to that might have done a back channel, that is very poor form. I would if I were you be sure to let folks know when and if you continue in that conversation that it did spin back to you and that you were put at risk. Let them know in writing that any further conversations with them are 100% confidential and that you are not willing to risk current employment to consider new roles, especially if they recruited you.

7. AnonymousAugust 12,2024 at 1:29AM UTC

   OP. Great responses. Thank you for taking the time to help me, and others i am sure. It is truly appreciated!!!

8. AnonymousAugust 12,2024 at 5:18PM UTC

   I wrote the item above, you are very welcome! I hope it helps you and keeps things in the right points of control for your search!

9. AnonymousAugust 11,2024 at 9:49PM UTC

   You could say that or just stay cool about it not telling anything. If you are considering moving to another company (and you have your boss as a reference) then it doesn't really matter what boss's boss is thinking about that. You don't have to ask her for permission to look for a new job or to respond to job offers. On the other hand I know that working for a job politician can be scary. But if you are serious about leaving then nobody can stops you.

10. AnonymousAugust 12,2024 at 1:27PM UTC

    You know your industry and work culture better (some are more candid about when they're shopping around/interviewing- some are very closed and don't say a thing). On the whole, I'd advise not to say too much.

    You asked what you should say. You have a few choices.

    1.Say nothing. Don't bring it up

    2.If you have a good relationship with the boss' boss (BB), you could be honest, but be brief.

    3.While lying is technically an option- I'd advise against it. Rather, I'd say Pivot the conversation.

    If your BB asks you (most wouldn't), I'd encourage you to keep it conversational. You could put questions to them like, "Oh, where'd you hear that from?" Get them to tell you things. Or "Uh oh, should I be looking?" If the BB is super political at work, they are skilled at getting info. and using it to their advantage. (So you'd have to ask yourself how is knowing this about you helping them). Unless it helps you, don't give info. away. You could find a quip like, "Oh, I make sure my resume is updated and sure headhunters call me from time to time." You could also add that you'd love to talk more with them about your role, opportunities, where you see yourself and how you could help one another. Turn it into a conversation.

    You seem pretty confident that if you wanted a new job you could get one. That is a very wonderful place to be (and in this day and age- a privilege - as many folks may be interviewing for about a year to find a job and some have been let go).

    Good luck!

11. AnonymousAugust 12,2024 at 2:18PM UTC

    Why can't you look for growth and more money? Employees are expected to show high level loyalty that is not usually returned. It's a job and you have every right to reach higher.

12. Tami L CannizzaroAugust 12,2024 at 2:45PM UTC

    I would second the good advice you've already received, that I agree it's usually a good idea to listen when someone wants to tell you about a potential opportunity. I do this as well; you never know, right? One difference: I keep this to myself, not sharing even with my closest allies. I don't want this information to get back to anyone at work, plus, if it does somehow come up - as in your case - I don't want my allies to be put in an awkward position. They can honestly say they had "no idea".

13. AnonymousAugust 12,2024 at 8:25PM UTC

    To make sure I'm clear, you told your boss you were looking for a job who then confided in their boss, correct? If this is the case, please remember your boss is not your friend. Though you may shoot the sh*t to discuss the disorganization of your organization, their allegiance is not to you. If the company you interviewed with did an unofficial mention of your name, that is not professional and should not have been discussed. Believe it or not people get fired for trying to interview elsewhere. I do not agree, but I know it happens. So just be careful.

    And you don't have to explain yourself. If asked, this is what I use. We are all job seekers, we all came from somewhere and may go elsewhere. Say in gist and it usually gets them off your back. If they are worried, I would say, look, I'm not necessarily looking, but sometimes opportunity knocks and I feel I must answer that and explore for myself. Then say, do you have any other concerns or questions I can answer for you?

14. Hilary18August 13,2024 at 12:29PM UTC

    The boss’s boss told the boss that OP was looking for a new job. The boss already knew. I really hope the boss played dumb when he was told.

15. AnonymousAugust 13,2024 at 1:04PM UTC

    Op. To clarify we do not know how boss's boss found out. Suspect the recruiter was indiscrete.

16. SPNN4 SAugust 13,2024 at 1:12PM UTC

    You can just keep that bit of info on the back burner during your skip level and just say that you are looking for opportunities internally within the company to learn about how different departments operate and how that can tie into professional development and/or additional responsibilities.

    But suffice to say that you may be feeling a little stuck and stagnant and you are not engaged in your current role

17. AnonymousAugust 28,2024 at 3:25PM UTC

    OP. Bosses boss didn't mention it at all. It was a vapid conversation, she loves to talk about herself!!!