Only person in my team passed up for a raise/promotion

14 Comments

1. AnonymousNovember 21,2025 at 1:07PM UTC

   Im sorry you are going through this. Have you asked your manager or a trusted peer for honest feedback?

   Are you doing great work that nobody knows about? Sadly promotions now are more about visibility and internal relationships.

   If you are not able to get actionable feedback, I'd suggest quietly putting your resume together and find a place where you are valued.

2. Barb HansenNovember 21,2025 at 1:23PM UTC

   You’re not overreacting or being “entitled.” You’re responding to a real imbalance between your contributions and how they’re being recognized.

   Here’s what I’d do next:

   Have a structured conversation with your manager.

   Frame it around your future, not frustration.

   You can say something like:

   “I’d like to talk about what it will take for me to move into the next level, both in terms of scope and compensation. Can we build a clear plan and timeline for that?”

   Ask for specific deliverables, milestones, and timeframes (e.g., “Let’s set a 3–6 month plan and revisit progress in X months”).

   Document everything.

   After the meeting, summarize what was agreed on and send a short follow-up email (“Thanks for the conversation, to confirm, we agreed that…”). It creates a paper trail and accountability.

   Invest in yourself while you wait.

   If your company offers internal training, take advantage of it, management, leadership, or strategy courses signal readiness for the next level. Use this time to gain new skills and strengthen your network.

   Set a decision point for yourself.

   If, after the agreed period, there’s still no movement, no raise, no promotion, no clear path, take that as your cue. At that point, redirect your energy toward finding your next opportunity, where your work will actually be valued.

   You deserve to be recognized and compensated for the impact you’re making. Having a plan in place helps you either move forward where you are or move on to another opportunity.

3. AnonymousNovember 21,2025 at 2:09PM UTC

   Been there done that...was promised over and over again that it would happen. It didn't. People that really weren't deserving of it, were promoted (but it's a minor promotion, he's not getting much more money blah blah blah). Long story short...you've been doing what you've been doing however lunch without putting up much of a fuss. It's time you do yourself a favor and find another employer that will appreciate you (just learn from me and don't just take the first offer that comes along).

4. Paulla Fetzek, MSEdNovember 21,2025 at 2:11PM UTC

   Hello!

   I'm sorry this happened. In a way this sounds like the "you're so valuable we can't let you go" syndrome.

   To begin, you aren't entitled.

   I would create a list of all the things you've taken on since you began maternity cover. Includes dates (even if it's just the month) if possible. Include those things you continue to do now that the person is back.

   Spend a bit of time on sites like Salary.com and Glassdoor. Research the going-rate for your position. Or what you can find that would be the closest to it. Admittedly, many people are in a role but do far more/far different than what the basic role is.

   When you have all this, ask to speak to your manager. It's easy for me to say, but you have the right to say to her point blank, "I wanted to speak to you about a concern I have. It's come to my attention...." and then list the things you've noticed. Team members getting promotions. You not getting a raise. Your bonus being an "all in one".

   Then pitch to her why you believe you deserve more. Bring out your list and go through everything. Show her the information from Salary, Glassdoor, etc of your pay difference.

   Finally, end with asking for the salary you believe is fair (based on your research). If there's a promotion you believe you're entitled to, mention it. You said you enjoy the work - let your manager know this. You're not asking for something unreasonable. You're asking to be properly compensated and recognized for all that you are.

   All the best...

5. KatNovember 21,2025 at 6:12PM UTC

   I agree with the factual approach described below. Let your manager know what additional duties you've taken on and what you should be paid for the level of work you're doing based on your research. Find out what you need to do to get promoted next time. If your manager will advocate for you, that's great. Make sure there's a timeline for a promotion if you meet X criteria. Document that in an email so you have it in writing. "I will get X title and X salary if I do these things by X date". If you meet the criteria and no promotion comes in the timeline, or there's a lot of push back to your request (or vague promises but no concrete plan), you'll know that it's time to move on. Polish up your resume and start networking now so you have a back up plan if the promotion doesn't happen. So many people take on lots of extra duties and never get compensated/appreciated for it-myself included. Know your worth and find a company that will appreciate what you do and pay you what you deserve. Good luck!

6. SPQNovember 22,2025 at 7:13AM UTC

   First, sorry for over explaining but I think THE BELOW IS IMPORTANT! (For the TL;DR version, feel free to skip to my last paragraph. For the haters that want to blame the company or manager, read it all and understand that being middle management isn't easy!!).

   Definitely point out your contributions. Definitely point out the promotions you noticed around you. You can mention how you feel, but down dwell on it or it'll sound whiny or you're frustrated and angry.

   One thing that is SUPER IMPORTANT TO BE AWARE OF but that others haven't mentioned. Perhaps, your manager either didn't know or didn't have a choice on the compensation package you're provided after a positive performance review.

   Here's the thing when I was a manager. A manager got to choose, on behalf of the employee, the type of "bonus" they got.

   When my employees hit the top of their salary band, I couldn't give anything more than cost-of-living increases. The rest was paid out as a bonus IF our department had the budget. Or if we didn't have the budget, they'd get extra paid time off. Or a combination or mix of a measly COLA, plus more time off, plus a one-time bonus.

   Another thing is that the budget "pie" was divided amongst a department. So if we had 3/3 employees exceeding expectations, we'd still only have a limited budget and then everyone has to share the pie. If I was given $10,000 to hand out, I might not be able to make a strong enough business case that I want $20,000 because all of my team are superstars. Why is this sometimes a lost cause? Because our executives have the big picture of all high performers across the company, and I only have the point of view of my team and if my departments goals were game-changing.

   So in this case, it could play out like:
   - promote our junior exceptional employees at $3000/annum extra (to reach intermediate)
   - promote our intermediate exceptional employee at $4000/annum extra (to reach senior)
   - give a $3000 bonus to our senior exceptional employee with no promotion (because they are at the top of the salary ladder, based on market)

   It also sounds like your manager may not really have control of the decisions. If she went to bat for you HOPING to get you a promo, but failed, then she got trumped by an executive who shut her down.

   As a manager, I had also experienced this. Every annual compensation decision I made was subject to changes based on an executive overruling the decision. Please know that as a manager in my previous company, when we submit compensation increases, it gets reviewed by my Director, then gets reviewed by my VP, then the General Manager can have the final say. And yes, I had decisions supported up to the VP level, then reduced by the GM.

   I know this isn't 100% your case. You mention you are paid below salary for your role in the industry--well I will tell you that the company I worked for was well-known to pay 20% below market, but they had great culture and other perks (WFH fully remote, awesome parties, gift card contests). But given the promotions around your team, they're probably not poor AF, as mine was.

   The other case is that perhaps you've reached the top of your salary band. Well, this might also not true as your manager were gunning for your promotion. So that seems to indicate you haven't reached your salary band maximum (?) or your manager was misinformed--didn't know, got denied, and didn't tell you because you didn't bring it up when you accepted the bonus.

   Regardless. Please take some time to consider a soft approach, choose to be inquisitive rather than defensive. Perhaps: (1) Your manager made a silly mistake and thought you'd prefer a bonus instead of a promotion; and you were happy so she never knew she oops'ed (2) you reached the top of your salary band, and she failed to tell you (3) your department/company had no more budget (4) your manager can't fully control the promotion decisions and she keeps mum.

   Know that no manager will ever tell their employee "well I tried but my boss said no" cause that's just unprofessional. But a smart and experienced manager would also ask for feedback from their boss ( or boss's boss, or whoever) what the employee needs to do to be promoted, and hopefully that manager will be able to give you feedback should you ask why you didn't get promoted. So for this reason, I suspect this is where your signals were mixed. You asked for a promotion, your boss brought it up and got voted down. They suggested to her "give her a bonus instead, for her hard work during the mat leave". Your boss said, "Ok, that seems reasonable". When presented with the bonus, you were happy. In all respects, that was case closed for your boss. Now you feel inequity as you see the results of the rest of your team.

   Have that conversation. Be kind. Goodluck.

7. AnonymousNovember 26,2025 at 3:56AM UTC

   This comment was very informative. I will definitely remember it in the future. Thank you!

8. GirlBossanova934974November 22,2025 at 1:45PM UTC

   Time to go elsewhere or look for an intercompany transfer to another group! I had something like that happen to me a while back. The TEAM all got signed up for expensive IT training at a cost of over $30K per employee. They got to learn all the hot software and get paid while they were doing it. I got the job of running the old stuff. I brought in several hundred thousand in new business. Then when the new software got installed, I was supposed to get my share. In the next all hands meeting, it was announced that I would continue to do "whatever I was doing". I had a new job in 3 weeks and had my resignation letter on my manager's desk the next morning!

9. AnonymousNovember 22,2025 at 3:11PM UTC

   Not a lot of information here on your background and that makes it hard to make a qualified assessment on the situation.

   It could be just a timing thing. How long have you been with the company? and how long have you been in that particular role within the company? and... How does that compare with your peers in the same role?

   While I dont agree with it, the reason could be you have less tenure than your peers in some way.

10. AnonymousNovember 23,2025 at 1:29PM UTC

    You don’t. They know. They don’t care. The only answer is leave.

11. AnonymousNovember 23,2025 at 1:40PM UTC

    Say nothing, and find another job. Your immediate boss did not right by you.

12. Prefer to not sayNovember 23,2025 at 2:32PM UTC

    That happened to me too. Make sure to advocate for yourself to your boss & their boss. I’d suggest to approach in a kind & non confrontational way and share your contributions and why you felt deserving of the promotion & felt that would be fair.

13. AnonymousNovember 23,2025 at 6:11PM UTC

    What are the ages of the rest of your team? If you're 40 and over, you can claim age.

14. KatNovember 25,2025 at 3:15PM UTC

    While this is a good starting point, you have to make sure you don't come off as too passive. OP doesn't want to just do better at her current job - she wants to move up. Many bosses pass over employees for promotion because they're solid performers and they don't want to lose them. It's best to have a talk with the boss about specifics to make sure they are as invested in your career growth as you are. Ask why you were passed over (lack of tenure, missing skills) and how you can make sure you get a promotion next time. Get a deadline (6 months) rather than vague promises ("we'll see if it's in the budget", "not your turn", or "wait until things settle down"). If you do your part and the deadline passes with no movement, polish up the resume and start looking for other positions. If your boss is holding you back, get a new boss.