Have you ever been pushed out of your job by a cutthroat supervisor or colleague?

28 Comments

1. AnonymousNovember 5,2022 at 11:44PM UTC

   Yes, unfortunately. I came into a position overqualified but was happy to have landed the job after being out of work for 2 years (I was in my late 50s when I landed the job, and had a really difficult time landing anything, I believe due to ageism but cannot prove that). My direct supervisor who was a Senior Director was extremely happy with my progress and the changes I was making at the company. At my one-year annual review, I was presented with an excellent rating, along with a 12% raise, and a promotion. But my boss' boss (the VP) didn't like me. I suspect it was because I am brutally honest and bring problems out into the open and discuss with the other members of the leadership team so we can determine solutions. I think he took this personally, as if I was finding fault with his organization or his leadership. I quickly learned just how fragile his ego was when 3 months after the promotion/pay raise/excellent review I was pushed out. Another factor was that I had joined an all-male team of long-standing company men and 2 of my direct reports had a very difficult time with having a woman as their boss. So now I'm 60 years old and just want to be done with corporate life. Too much jealousy and ego-driven individuals and competition. Add to that that employees are now given more power than managers and it makes going back very undesirable. I've been working in corporate life since I was 18 (didn't go to college to get my bachelor's degree until later and did so while working full-time).

2. AnonymousNovember 7,2022 at 4:33PM UTC

   Exactly how were you pushed out?

3. AnonymousNovember 6,2022 at 11:26PM UTC

   I was pushed out by my Manager like you.

   She wanted me to cheat the numbers so her bonus was bumped up and I wouldn't do it. She alleged I wasn't doing my job on something else and wrote me up - had things on there that weren't even in my job description. I had a 17 page rebuttal but when I tried for another job in the org that write up came back and magically my rebuttal did not. I ended up leaving like you for a better job.

   My Manager (I heard) later mistakenly let the Union into the org which didn't make her popular with management and she was let go. So sad.

4. AnonymousNovember 7,2022 at 1:43PM UTC

   Yes! I had this exact situation happen to me. It ruined my drive to perform, and somehow, even though we all complained to HR, WE were the ones who left since we didn't have a voice. I ended up taking a pay cut to get away from the toxicity, and now we've all been replaced by people much younger and greener. She's still there, doing fine. And we are all out exploring other options. The things that was the worst was going from a star employee in a job I loved to being written up for nonsense just because of my manager. It gets better, and some people just know how to play the game better.

5. AnonymousNovember 8,2022 at 1:47PM UTC

   Comments like yours here shed so much light on some very serious work "ethics".

   It's eye-opening to read how the worst-tempermented aemployees get promoted.

   It's a relief knowing these situations are not isolated. Still sad though.

   I refuse to engage in unnecessary (childish) drama, under the guise of "company culture", instigated by bullies.

   I won't dumb myself down for anybody either after a lifetime of learning valuable skills. Soft skills being the most important.

   I already graduated from high school for Pete's sake.

6. EMILY KIKUE FRANKNovember 7,2022 at 2:30PM UTC

   Sadly, the worst people seem to keep falling up. My toxic manager is still there, as well, although the whole unit has been deeply (and, I suspect, really painfully for the department) reorganized and meshed with another unit. So, boss is still there but probably unhappy....

7. AnonymousNovember 7,2022 at 2:49PM UTC

   My supervisor thinks I’m doing this to her. I’m not. I’m her manager and nee to the role. I need and want her to be happy but she is convinced I’m here to take over. I’m not! Any tips on how I can prove this. Sorry I’m not answering your question but I really want her to trust me. She’s amazing!!

8. AnonymousNovember 7,2022 at 3:15PM UTC

   DANG... so many people have experienced this, including me. There are so many posts about this kinda stuff going on. I cannot understand why there are so many toxic companies out there. I really can't. It's ego, insecurity, all the stuff. I can understand that - we all have it to some degree. What I can't understand is allowing those things to turn into vicious behavior where someone decides it's in any way ok to destroy another person, manipulate other people, and pretend that's power. It isn't. It's nasty and unnecessary. It's not even actually work. I challenge all companies to root out this behavior. Ultimately, it does not serve anyone or anything, especially not the company itself.

9. Sasha AustrieNovember 7,2022 at 3:38PM UTC

   This happened to me about 4 years ago. My manager kept moving the barometer for success; it is impossible to meet a moving target when you don't know where it'll show up next, but I tried my best. I had a series of good reviews and raises, and then suddenly, I was given the opportunity to either exit the company or be placed on an Improvement Plan. What hurt the most is that no one in the organization questioned how I went from good reviews to an improvement plan, not HR, not her boss who had to approve her course of action. My confidence in myself had been whittled down to nothing. Things I knew to be true about myself didn't feel so true anymore.

   I elected to leave the company because when this happened I was actively searching for a new position and was days away from accepting another position outside of the company. Last year, I heard from former co-workers that she was mysteriously fired. No one knows why and HR isn't talking.

10. AnonymousNovember 7,2022 at 3:46PM UTC

    I had that experience. A subordinate manager was bedding her way into a leadership role. I ignored it. Then I became aware she was using her contacts in HR to frequently a bad image of me. My actual boss was replaced suddenly, and shortly afterwards left the company. My new boss meant well, but he was unable to help me, and actually told me so. HR was apologetic, but also unable to help and I was soon laid off and she moved up. It was the best thing that could have happened. I changed career direction and it's been for the best.

    I have since learned that 18 months later, the individual was terminated for cause because the District Manager was apparently her next target... But he had a long-standing close friendship with the CEO.

    What goes around, comes around.

11. Goalsetter498760November 8,2022 at 2:33PM UTC

    I have a very similar story.

    The manger who abused me and then pushed me out via layoff lasted another 2.5 years and then finally quit.

    It turns out that the team of all new people they thought they would be able to control all skipped the team upper management (also not super great since they protected her for so long, even after the team I was on talked to them at length about her abusive behavior) and made formal complaints to HR about manager's abusive behavior. She saw the writing on the wall and finally quit.

    Indeed just sent me an ad for for her job a couple of days ago (it has been vacant for about a month and a half) and I literally laughed until I cried. I would NEVER, even with her out, go back to that place after what they did to me.

12. AnonymousNovember 7,2022 at 4:44PM UTC

    This is so similar to the problem I face right now. There seems to be no solution.

13. AnonymousNovember 8,2022 at 1:23PM UTC

    I just went through this. I eventually left and the HR director actually texted me this weekend trying to get dirt on a current employee. The audacity! So happy I left. She knew I could run circles around her and she’s suddenly my best friend now that I left.

14. AnonymousNovember 8,2022 at 1:45PM UTC

    I've also been through this exact situation. A colleague of mine was promoted to manager and I think was intimidated that she didn't know as much as I did. I don't mean that to sound full of myself but this woman really wasn't that good at her job prior to becoming manager. The only thing she was good at was fitting in with the mean girls. Our big boss was on her way to retirement and was clueless or apathetic to everything that was going on in her department. HR I find has been pretty useless in all situations. They're not there for the employees. They're there to "protect" the business.

    It eventually got so bad I couldn't take it anymore. I actually put in my notice without another job lined up. Luckily, I found something pretty quickly and this job has been pretty good to me. Have now been here for almost 3 years. I've heard that a number of the staff that I worked with at the previous job have since moved on as well. I'm pretty sure the program that I worked so hard to build and develop a reputation for has since dissolved. Used to be one of the best! Shame on them for allowing such toxicity to develop and fester.

15. Sa liNovember 8,2022 at 2:48PM UTC

    I have just been through a very similar situation. Imagine that they are in the 100 best places to work for in the US. They were all females that conspired together to do this and it started at the top with lots of deception!

16. AnonymousNovember 8,2022 at 2:55PM UTC

    Yes, I also experienced this in a similar fashion. The former head of the agency hired this person for the role that should have been my next progression. I stayed for 2 years and left because this supervisor clearly wanted me out of the way and it was difficult. I was also being undermined by my team and my projects started to diminish. It was a difficult time and I jumped ship kind of in desperation...left for a contract role and that was not a good fit. Found myself out of work, but this break became a huge blessing...I started my LLC, worked on a variety of projects and then landed an amazing role at a non-profit. I actually found a lot of support and encouragement on this page which is why I am sharing my experience. I have been in my new role for almost a year and got what I prayed for...good people, good work, good benefits, good pay and easy commute. So what was meant for harm, turned out to be my blessing. My season of unemployment had its ups and downs, and surely was not easy, but yielded several blessings and provided somewhat of a break that I didn't realize I really needed. I actually ran into that former boss at an event and she looked like a "deer in headlights." I may have left that situation, but I was not defeated and I am doing well and I looked fantastic that evening! The lesson learned is that people do REAP what they sew. This same person was made uncomfortable and eventually left the same place. I don't wish her any harm, but I do know that I prefer to treat people well and I am leading by example where I am. Think of that boss' action was what propelled you to what sounds like is even better. You actually won in my opinion. Thinking back on the others who supported her in being against me are actually miserable or ended up leaving the same place. To all -Don't let another person's bad actions sour you, rise above and be better. Stay encourage and do good and you will win in the end! I believe it!

17. Michele LaCagninaNovember 8,2022 at 2:58PM UTC

    I'm sorry you had to deal with this but based on the comments, it's more common than I thought. I was in a similar situation and while it was awful and scary at the time, when I look back I wouldn't have done anything differently. I stuck to my ethics and values in an environment that didn't have any.

    Reading all these stories makes me realize it's possible to rise above mean girl culture and make a positive change. Pretty much everyone here left for a better job. We found the strength to get through a miserable situation and we're thriving. You will, too!

18. AnonymousNovember 8,2022 at 3:11PM UTC

    So this has just happened to me. I was already a department manager for many years, but when another department manager was hired, who happened to be really good friends with our manager already outside of work, he decided that he wanted to go further with his career with the company, which is fine, but he didn't care whose throat he had to cut. Unfortunately, that was mine as I was up for the next promotion. I had always known that the buddy system with this company was strong. But when I transferred to this particular location, I thought this was going to be different. Wrong. Morals and ethics really were not a thing here. I had been already looking for another job, but then COVID had struck, so I had no other choice to stay and like my job. This past six months had been a difficult one with this particular person and with situations that come about, that he had been involved in. But, I was not in the "circle" so I really had no help. My manager, who had been with the company for many years, had a reputation of being a bully and he had his ways to make sure that he was secured so that no one could come back on him. So, I had no help with this situation.

    Looking back on this experience now, I realized just how toxic company this is. And probably the main reason why I have not been happy with the company for such a long time.

    I did not have a another job lined up, and have been getting by with working for myself, which is something that I have been wanting to do for a long time, so maybe this was the push that I needed.

19. Deb AllenNovember 8,2022 at 3:59PM UTC

    Yes, and it rarely ends well for the lower-level employee. I worked for a Fortune 100 global corporation, but they do not like to admit their failings. So poor managers get promoted, over and over to move the problem around.

20. AnonymousNovember 8,2022 at 4:07PM UTC

    This just happened to me too! (In education, of all places.) I am so sorry that you're going through this. Does anyone have suggestions for supportive, women+ centered companies to apply to? Many thanks!

21. Ainslie BinderNovember 8,2022 at 4:41PM UTC

    OMG, I had no idea this happened so often! It just happened to me. I had been working with a team as part of the management group for about 7 months when one of the executives who hired me left. She was replaced a couple of months later by a man who immediately began questioning how we were doing almost everything. In particular, he questioned why certain people's roles even existed. A few weeks later, a junior staff member left and I was asked to assume her job responsibilities, in part because of the faith that senior management had in my ability to juggle multiple projects at one time. I was told the plan was for me to learn everything the former junior employee did, then to train a new employee and hand the job responsibilities back over. I was even able to negotiate a merit-based raise as I approached my 1 year anniversary with the team. Fast forward to 3 weeks ago, when it became clear they weren't going to hire another junior team member and that they had basically redefined my job to include all the "housekeeping" tasks of the former employee, which weren't a great fit, and not what I signed on for. So 2 months after I got a merit-based raise, I am gone. In addition to this, the new executive is now being promoted over the other executive who's been with the company for 20 years. It seems like I got out just in time.

22. AnonymousNovember 8,2022 at 4:51PM UTC

    Oh yes, by a woman I hired. She clearly wanted control and did everything she could to undermine me and turned the new boss against me. I was still respected across the company but the bullying by her and my boss pushed me to look for a new role outside the company. It was sad to leave BUT...I was a manager, got hired as a director for what turned out to be an amazingly fast growing company and then I recently took a senior director role.

    She is still in her more junior role, and the manager was asked to leave due to her poor management style. Karma is a thing. Sometimes what seems like a storm is the change that will water the garden to come.

23. AnonymousNovember 8,2022 at 4:52PM UTC

    I wish I could find a positive spin to put on your situation, but the exact same thing happened to me. Maybe there is some comfort in knowing you are not alone. Bullying isn't against the law and so it is rampant in the workplace. I eventually made the difficult choice to resign to protect my health and sanity. The person they hired to replace me left after 6 months, and was followed by 3 other recruits who didn't last. Yet the bully got promoted. Once they expanded her authority, three other wonderful long-term employees quit because of her. She endures, happily making $200K a year and taking credit for others' achievements while ruining their lives.

    You sound like a wonderful employee and I hope you find a fresh start somewhere that values you.

24. AnonymousNovember 9,2022 at 3:49AM UTC

    I’m currently dealing with this. I didn’t realize I was being pushed out till last week when a fellow coworker told me some rumours she heard. 3 months prior, my employer raved about me and identified me as a future leader… but once I got two new bosses I found myself being pushed out of important conversations and projects. I noticed the shift but couldn’t pin point why. I used internal resources to help push through it but in the end was offered a new job by a ex-client and decided to take it.

    I’m leaving this toxic job next week but can’t help to feel sad and depressed about what I experienced and about leaving my team behind. I’m even sadder to see other people going through it.

    I don’t have any other advice other than work somewhere that values you.

25. Kristie WhiteNovember 10,2022 at 8:50PM UTC

    Gosh ladies, this is so GOOD for me to read!! I experienced the exact same thing - IN HR! I was a Benefits Manager in a large hospital. The new VP/HR hired a new team of upper managers with 1-2 incumbents staying. The new Compensation Manager didn't like it when I challenged her for a very poor decision by one of her staff. After that, she went after me to get my job. She undermined every email she was copied on by challenging every little thing I said in capital letters with multiple exclamation points to imply my judgement was poor. She constantly gossiped about me, implied I was incompetent in meetings, and made it obvious I couldn't handle my job. I - like many of you - had been a star - well liked by my new VP/HR and praised on my first review. But the new VP/HR turned out to be oblivious to the problem, a workaholic who regularly worked 100 hours a week and buried you in work by 8 am. So add that pressure to the bullying that was ignored and condoned by my VP, and by the second review, I was hanging on by a thread and spending every day behind the closed door of my office, crying. And I was a single parent of a challenging 14 year old at the time.

    This was in 1997. And I had no idea what I was experiencing. I couldn't figure out how to succeed. As a new person to the city, I had made a new friend at work - and she cut me loose and distanced herself from me. I was isolated. I sought therapy through EAP who told me that I seemed to be in a bad situation and needed to find a new job - knowing what we had all discovered - that the new VP/HR was a workaholic with no empathy for humans but she controlled their contract. I then sought outside therapy and learned my VP/HR had a character disorder and I needed to protect myself and leave. So knowing my VP was not going to ever back me up - which I kinda figured out when she started talking about me in the third person while sitting right beside of me - I left. I heard later that some people saw it and knew that the my VP and peer manager ran me off. I heard they said I was one of the good ones - and they're right! I am.

    It was one of the worst experiences I have ever been through. But I know it was one of the catalyst that spurred me to start my own business. And I know that - though there are great people in HR - there are also "others". And I learned how horrible managers can be, how toxic workplaces can be, and how unfair politics can treat you. And I vowed I would never be that way toward anyone I work with.

    I have been told by multiple people now from various relationships including that hospital that I was the best boss they ever had. My two rules? The golden rule - treat your team as you want to be treated and ask them what they want from the job, what value do they want to take away, and help them get it. 2. Don't make your staff/team choose between family and the job - the family always comes first. So be their advocate to ensure that.

26. AnonymousNovember 11,2022 at 5:27AM UTC

    First the manager tried to bully me but I verbally defended myself. They tried to make me commit to a management without giving me any specific details of the job and how it would connect with current assignments. Since the manager couldn't tell me anything about the job, I refused to commit. Then the manager wanted me to give them some of my assignments. I did, but they didn't even do the work!

    The bullying escalated to screaming, writing emails in all caps -- when I asked the manager who hired them about the behaviour, they said it was just a misunderstanding. They sent the manager to a career coach and management classes but that didn't do squat. I was retaliated against from any position I had attained on my merit, and was assigned menial assignments that a junior employee could have done.

    To make a long story short, this manager used most of their time to denigrate the position I was in, then used whatever they could against me in performance reviews. The last performance review they accused me of not communicating enough -- but to the contrary I overcommunicated and organized my work, and it was all documented. (And the irony was my manager thought my spreadsheets outlining my schedule and work was "too much information") I told them I was quitting in 3 weeks. The manager was livid..my last day they were taking vacation. In my mind I thought too **** bad.

    Other people had complained about this individual but nothing was done other to shuffle them around to other positions.

    I'm consulting for a great group of people now, and making more in consulting than I was in this assignment.

    Corporate America needs to understand losing prime talent is because of bad managers, costing them not only to find new people but also it affects the employee's physical and mental health. That is not a sustainable situation.

27. Marina ChristiansNovember 11,2022 at 2:23PM UTC

    It was a set up to bully you so you would quit. They would take turns doing it to see who would win.

28. Bradford McCormickNovember 16,2022 at 2:43PM UTC

    Not me, but a former manager of mine. It was a male, but he was a poster child for "hire the handicapped". He looked mentally retarded, was partly crippled, obese and more. But he was a master computer programmer highly respected for his work by IBM Field Engineers, and an ethical giant. He got prooted to first line manager in a big bank (no college degree). And he led his team from the front, not from the rear.

    Long story short: After doing what he desctibed to me as the best work he had ever done in hi life on a mision-critical peoject for the 3rd line mgr, he was: fired. Why? The 2nd line mgrs wer afraid he as building power base against them. They were toadies. He told them: If you have a person who is not doing their job and you can't fire them, send them to him --> and I saw him turn one such person into a happy productive worker. The 3rd line's cardiologist had told him he had to reduce his strees level, so it was either the toadies or the ethical giant. He then went and did contract work in Saudi Arabia where that didn'' work out becaue he expected the Saudis to work. Then he went where you would think a handicapped person should be safe: A U.S. Federal Givernment Agency. They finally got rid of him. Another of his disabilities was that he was 100% color blind, a condition so rare that a major research hospital studied him. So he got assigned a project that 100% needed color vision.

    He finally took early retirement. As said, he wa not "educated". He got new severe health problems and was close to bedridden, and then Mr. Trump got elected President. I do not like Mt. Trump's politics. So he told me that he would have nothing more to do with me (after 40 years friendship) if I said one word more against Mr. Trump. And he told me he wa prepared to shoot it out at his front door to defend his rights in a new civil war against the Democrats. As said, he was at this point just barely capable of phsically getting to his front door, but he did have guns (He wa a responsible gun owner!). I no longer know what is happening to him. As for the 3rd line Mgr and his toadies and the other people who did not appreciate a living treasure for their employer, they all went on as they were. Maybe his fatal flaw was that he was not "polished", not a college educated person and that he did not look "handsome".