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I started a new job on Monday and wore a mask.

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Anonymous

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I started a new job on Monday and wore a mask. Today, my manager, who had a stern expression, interrogated me about why I was wearing it. It made me feel really uncomfortable, as if I had to justify my choice, almost like it was an offense. Any advice on how to handle this?

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  1. Anonymous

    Let him know your reason. He doesn't know why so he's assuming the worst of you.

  2. Anonymous

    That says a lot about him, though, and none of it good.

  3. Barbara Burke

    What ‘worst’? There’s no bad reason for wearing a mask unless she’s planning to rob the place at gunpoint.

  4. Anan

    What would the "worst" be, though?

  5. Anonymous

    Starting a new, you need to realize that first. They don't know you and same for you. I think it's okay for them to inquire. Perhaps respond and ask the protocol to learn from them.

  6. Anonymous

    That is the best response on this thread! I'm not the OP but will respond as well. I appreciated reading your reply.

  7. Anonymous

    Hi OP - You owe no one an explanation why you mask. A lot of people continue to mask or mask in certain situations. I work with someone who has an immunocompromised partner and is doing it to maintain their health and safety. So that you have some sort of answer if you feel inclined to answer your boss, let them know simply "I prefer to wear a mask." How nosey of your boss to interrogate you or anyone on here that reads this, NOONE has to tell anyone why they are masking. It's none of their business. Please people, be aware there are folks who prefer to wear them for different reasons. Dear OP - please know you absolutely have no requirement ever to explain your decision on mask wearing. I see many people continue to mask and I keep one in my purse. Should I hear someone that sounds like they are coughing up their lungs, then I may choose to put one on. I don't want what others have and I find it quite rude people are still asking others why they choose to mask. Hang in there, stand your ground and don't let this manager make you tell them anything.

  8. Colleen Hanson

    This irritates me so much! No matter why you are wearing it, you owe NO ONE an explanation. I would have simply responded with "It's my personal choice to wear one" and leave it at that! If your manager continues to interrogate you simply keep reiterating the fact that it is your own personal choice to do so and let him/her know that they are making you uncomfortable by continuing to ask you about it when you have already offered an explanation. You do not owe anyone an explanation any further than that.

  9. GirlBossanova934974

    Really simple one here. Please take a visit to HR and inquire about the company mask policy and get some clarification. That will clear up a lot of things very quickly.

  10. Anonymous

    If you felt the need to wear it to protect your health please let them know that. If the company handbook has a specific policy about not wearing them please let HR know that you prefer to and ask about this not being an issue with their help as you do not want to risk your new role.

  11. Anonymous

    1) this response is so wild that I would strongly suspect a political basis for the confrontation.

    2) that said, this is your new boss and you need to tread lightly if you can't just walk. This is absolutely the kind of thing that gets escalated as a reason to get rid of someone.

    Not sure what would be the best way to handle it (depends on how critical it is that you keep this job), but escalating to HR or even telling your supervisor to mind their own business in your first week on the job is unlikely to end well for you.

  12. Ashley Strosnider

    This comment seems really mean-spirited and not helpful. Please consider clarifying or deleting.

  13. Minda alena

    This post does not help the OP at all and is just mean.

  14. Diane J Huff

    Are you for real? These kind of comments belong on social media sites like X, where mean spirited comments are rampant. This is a site of support and guidance for women by women. If you don’t understand that, you need to leave.

  15. Anonymous

    Agree. Not nice at all

  16. Anonymous

    I wonder about your “cognitive ability” in suggesting that wearing a mask in private has anything to do with wearing a mask in public. What an overtly political and insensitive statement. There is scientific evidence that masking can reduce illness. In particular, if an ill person wears a mask, there is irrefutable evidence that it helps in preventing others from getting their illness. There is some debate about the other way around, but there is indeed evidence that wearing a mask can protect people to some extent so the OP is most certainly NOT your intellectual inferior. Regardless of how you feel about whether masks are effective or ineffective (which has weirdly become a political issue), if it allays the fears of an immunocompromised person, you should leave it to them. Wearing a mask isn’t hurting anyone (except you, it seems). Try to exhibit some kindness and understanding, even when you’re online. We’re here to support each other, not rip each other down. Your comment is out of line.

    OP, check your employee handbook. Is there anything specifically preventing you from wearing a mask? If there is, look for a new job. If not, you have a few choices:

    1) escalate to HR (but expect retaliation from your ignorant and politically-minded boss) - maybe consider requesting a transfer to a new boss immediately?

    2) have a heart-to-heart with your new boss and beg for compassion (no, you shouldn’t have to do this by any means, but if you’re in desperate need of this job, it may go some way to helping you keep it, at least for a while) - acknowledge your boss’s political beliefs, but explain that you’re very worried about your or a loved one’s health and need to wear it “in case”,

    3) don’t wear the mask and urgently find a new job, or if it’s too risky and you can’t cope financially, walk out

    It’s so frustrating to be in a difficult situation like this. Our world is so polarized and judgmental right now. Good luck in this trying time.

  17. Anonymous

    This is tough. If you are wearing it because of underlying health concerns you do not want to disclose that.

    I'd try to play it off as just not wanting to get sick and miss time at your new job. If your boss keeps pushing you will need to go to HR. But remember HR are there to protect the company and not you.

    You may need to low key keep looking. I'm sorry you are go8ng through this.

  18. Anonymous

    I’d advise saying that you are wearing it to protect others. You woke up with a sniffle and want to make sure nothing spreads. Then I would go to HR and report it in the nicest way possible. I remember during the bad old days of the pandemic being accosted for wearing a mask (when it was mandatory, by the way!) and it calmed people right down … God forbid you are protecting yourself! But that’s a rant for another day. ALSO and very important it is NOT anyone’s business why you are wearing the mask. But these days it’s just best to deflect and keep the bullies and political hot heads at bay. Good luck!!

  19. Anonymous

    Seriously you are mean spirited and clearly ignorant. Have you ever gone through chemo therapy and had your system comprised? Or are cancer and chemo an illusion. These masks allow people to go

    on with their lives and mitigate the risks to their health. Wake up and give a damn about others.

  20. Victoria Bigelow

    I can see why you post as “anonymous.” You do not care to disclose what a profoundly ignorant bully you are. Say, do you prefer your surgeons not wear masks, too? Feel safe? Or, do you make ugly, vapid remarks to them, too?

  21. Anonymous

    I’m curious as to why you put the word mask in quotation marks? If you feel this defensive when someone wants to protect themselves by wearing a mask, I would have to assume that you have an adversity to them. Continue to be mask free and judge others if they want to wear one, but not here. I don’t think this is the right platform for you. You sound angry, bitter and judgmental. Go rant on some other site.

  22. Anonymous

    Your boss’s reaction is disgusting and it sounds really biased. Why would he be mad that you wore a mask?

    wearing a mask in a public setting is perfectly normal and it’s done all the time in other countries. There is no political connotation about it and you should not have to justify it.

    given the ridiculousness of the situation, still I would suggest that you play nice and try to be accommodating to your boss’s quirks. Since it is your first day or week, I would just grin and bear it. You could say something like you don’t want to get sick or I caught something before and I don’t wanna miss work. Make it light and humorous. Your job is to read his personality. You are being one step ahead even though on surface, you seem like you are not. No directness or confronts and absolutely no HR!! (Even if you are 100% in the right, it will not end well for you), just be nice and tell him you are protecting yourself from getting ill or catching something that might put you out of work.

    try that and see the situation diffuses, if not and he continues being upset with you and questioning then you can consider other steps

  23. Anonymous

    I actually got sick at work because someone decided to come in with a full blown cold, I was ill for 2 weeks, caught viral and sinus infection so I wore a mask to work for few days to avoid getting sick again. What problem do to have with people protecting themselves from cold/flu or dust??

  24. E C

    Back when contact tracing was still a thing, we had a colleague who called it "Faux-vid" and refused all masking and social distance requirements. 47 infections, multiple hospitalizations, and at least one month-long ICU stay were traced to our team.

  25. Anonymous

    I do this often at work. I care for my elderly mom and everyone knows it but I still (4yrs later) get asked when I wear a mask if I'm sick. Sometimes I am and sometimes I might be (I spend a lot of time in dr offices and hospital) and sometimes I am trying to avoid bringing anything home (like i hear the coughing in the office). Now I have been at my job 4yrs so I just tell them I'm protecting u today or protecting my mom depending on my reason. I always try to be nice and make it a joke but it rubs me the wrong way every time.

  26. J-M Severance

    So wearing a mask is not reflective of ones cognitive abilities. Not anyone's business anyway.

  27. Barbara Burke

    Are you the boss? Wearing a mask has nothing to do with cognitive abilities or common sense. I worked in a hospital pre-covid and several coworkers (doctors) routinely wore masks during cold and flu season, especially when they were on public transit. I wonder about Your cognitive abilities.

  28. E C

    Excuse you? Masking has nothing to do with one's cognitive abilities, except that it's often smarter to wear one than not. As for wearing it in the car, when I wore one regularly, I found it easier once I got it in place around hair, earrings, and glasses to simply leave it in place. Keep your attitude to yourself.

  29. Kara Tyson

    Did you inform your new boss during the interview?

  30. E C

    It's not the OP's responsibility to do that, or appropriate for the employer to expect. It's the OP's choice.

  31. Anonymous

    But if she interviewed without a mask and is now wearing one, it's just common decency that he be assured she's not really sick in the office.

  32. Anonymous

    It is your choice to be health-conscious. Your manager might have been just curious. There is nothing wrong in continuing to wear the mask, if you tend to be prone to illness especially with airborne pathogens.

  33. Anonymous

    “Uncomfortable” - wow that is so loaded

  34. Vanessa McMains

    N95 masks when worn properly protect immune compromised people.

  35. Echo Wyche

    Cloth masks worn correctly can also offer protective value for the immune compromised and those with certain allergies

  36. Echo Wyche

    First- it’s irresponsible to offer medical opinion to another if you are not a medical professional. Second- it is incorrect and masks are a tool utilized to minimize exposure to airborne illness, allergens, and much more.

  37. Anonymous

    I am so sorry that a piece of benign medical equipment has become part of a political arsenal. A mask does not inhibit your job performance, compromise professional ethics or behavior, and as such should not be cause for concern or discussion. Well before Covid cloth masks were standard wear for those going through cancer treatment, utilizing immune suppressing medications, people prone to airborne allergies, and much more. Though I’d hope it would not come to this you can have your primary care provider write you a note outlining rational for use and it would then fall under ADA protections.

  38. Anonymous

    What would be your rational for speaking to an employee about mask usage?

  39. Brandi Loding

    Interrogated or just asked? She may have just wanted to make sure you weren't sick or that they didn't need to take other precautions for the health of all employees. Did you wear the mask to the interview? If not, it would have been a legit question.

  40. Anonymous

    It is inappropriate to inquire about an employee’s medical status. It’s not clear why this is "not a great way to start a new job." I’d prefer employees who maintain their own health rather than listening to anti-science Luddites.

  41. JoAnn Moore

    To many, wearing a mask is offensive due to their "political beliefs." Having just had this happen at a wedding I planned, the pastor needed to wear a mask as he had a non-stop bloody nose due to a health issue. The Mother of the Bride and the bride insisted he take the mask off stating, "WE ARE NOT MASK PEOPLE," they shouted at him. In some cases the political climate is becoming challenging in our work places. Figuring out why the mask is not accepted/offensive could make a difference. Stay well!

  42. Anonymous

    Its unfortunate that some people are offended by mask wearers. There are a number of reasons to continue to wear a mask: COVID and the variants (RSV etc.) are still alive; coming in contact with people who have not been vaccinated ; having a compromised immune system or caring for elderly who fall into that category.

  43. Anonymous

    If she's spreading those viruses then she should be home not at work.

  44. Anonymous

    Good suggestion, however, if they are like some of us, catching a common cold is easy to do when folks are coughing into the air without covering their mouths; common hand washing, etc.

  45. Anonymous

    I seriously doubt you wore your mask during your interviews.

    It's fine if you want to take a stand for whatever reason but if you are that fragile, I would consider finding a work from home position.

  46. Gigi Devanney

    PLEASE learn the science about masks... they keep YOUR germs from being spread about. They do NOT PROTECT YOU from other peoples germs.

    To do that you need to be fitted into a N95 or KN95 (or similar mask. These are not the ones most people wear... and it should be fitted to you... by someone trained to do that.

    And for pete's sake, if you let the mask slip below your nose, you just look like an idiot.

    And there is some research that says wearing a mask helps keep you from touching your face... but...

  47. Anonymous

    Well first be honest. You pulled a bait and switch. You led everyone to believe you were healthy and strong during your interview process then you end up being a frail and sickly person who must wear a mask and act indignant when everyone finds your state dangerous. That's pretty wack.

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