MIND BLOWN...IS THIS EVEN MY LIFE???

Jen

September 23,2021 at 12:08AM UTC

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MIND BLOWN...IS THIS EVEN MY LIFE???

I interviewed for an Office Manager position within a small IT company. I was told my resume and qualifications were the reason I was selected to be interviewed first.

During the phone call the owner actually knew my previous employer, with whom I only worked for for 6 months. The owner said he wasn't surprised, he fired that business as a client due to being screamed at by the owner and no one should be subjected to that behavior. I thanked the owner for having this knowledge as you never want to talk badly about someone during an interview.

I was told I would be contacted by the end of the day...which was a Friday. Since I hadn't heard back, I called on Monday. The owner said he was speaking with his lawyer about an NDA for me. (During our phone interview I mentioned my son works for another IT company and now provide that service to my former employer that this owner fired as their client).

I received a TEXT from the owner the next day stating that the lawyer advised an NDA would not hold up in court and thanked me for my time. I am in shock.

I sent a text back informing him that I was HIPAA certified, had patients that played for the Red Sox and the local News Channel and privacy was something I adhere to on a daily basis. I said it was unfortunate that this qualification would not transfer over.

I am so confused. My work history was known prior to bringing me in person. Why should I not be able to get a job in IT because my son works the same industry? Seems like horses_ _ t to me. My husband works for the phone company...does that mean I can't work for Comcast?

Would LOVE thoughts and opinions on this. And thanks if you got this far!

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AnonymousSeptember 23,2021 at 12:27AM UTC
Mmmm sounds nuts!
But is it possible that that employer is very secretive with information and accounts that he doesn't want the possibility of breach?
Like I dont know what kind of work exactly that IT company does, but maybe they have proprietary info or technologies or accounts they safeguard. And you having a connection with your son in IT they see you as a posdible risk.
I dont know, I'm guessing a possible explanation. I have no idea.
My husband used to work in printing and his boss was insane, made him sign papers saying that he couldn't divulge to other printers or people who their clients were or what kind of projects they worked on. It was bizarre to me.
AnonymousSeptember 23,2021 at 12:27AM UTC
I think that manager found someone else and rather than say "we know we liked you, but.....", he had to think of something to help his ego.
I'm sorry you are dealing with this.
AnonymousSeptember 23,2021 at 12:27AM UTC
What is an NDA?
AnonymousSeptember 23,2021 at 1:05AM UTC
NON-DISCLOSURE AGREEMENT. Another name for a confidentiality agreement.
Kristie WhiteSeptember 23,2021 at 2:27AM UTC
I believe when you made that comment about your son, you revealed you have associations with a competitor of this company. And the comment the lawyer made about the non-disclosure agreement not holding up in court meant you could reveal information to your son that was private and part of this IT company’s competitive advantage, they could sue you in court for breaking your NDA, and they would lose because the NDA was unenforceable. Nothing would be considered more dangerous than bringing in someone who might reveal trade secrets. And the privacy comments you mentioned (HIPAA, patients, etc.) don’t have anything to do with it. This is about competing for clients, not your former boss.
Shamika BrownSeptember 24,2021 at 12:37PM UTC
Spot on. Sometimes we “think” we are being conversational but reveal too much. This was one of those times. It’s not personal…just business. They have to protect themselves. Good luck in your search.
Jackie GhedineSeptember 23,2021 at 10:43AM UTC
Trying to decode the intention around the behavior isn't going to benefit you at all. I know it's a puzzle and we feel as though we want the missing piece. However, you'll never know so I would suggest moving on and put it in the past.
Focus on your next job with greater opportunities. Good luck!
Bobbie LloydSeptember 24,2021 at 12:24PM UTC
In the words of Ariana Grande, "Thank you, Next". You were saved from whatever is happening at that organization. Onward and upward. Best of luck!
LisaSeptember 24,2021 at 12:37PM UTC
Move on. This is a huge sign of how they operate. While NDAs are appropriate for a lot of instances, they should have had their game together for this possibility.
Also, stop giving them so much information.
AnonymousSeptember 24,2021 at 12:49PM UTC
To be fair you’ve given them a lot of info that was not their business. Doesn’t matter where your son works or who you’ve worked with in previous roles. Being loose lipped probably made them feel like you’d share information with your son just “conversationally”. Keep your personal life close to the chest on interviews.
AnonymousSeptember 24,2021 at 12:57PM UTC
I agree.... "Don't ask, don't tell" is a great mantra. Especially with social media out there. You never know.
AnonymousSeptember 24,2021 at 1:36PM UTC
You should not have discussed your son at all during the interview.
Paulla Fetzek, MSEdSeptember 24,2021 at 2:32PM UTC
Jen, I'm sorry you lost the opportunity. I'm surprised though that their lawyer claimed the NDA wouldn't hold up in court. My company requires those in Corporate Sales to sign an NDA and I'm positive our president would take it to court if the conditions were broken. I have to wonder if that excuse is what's being used rather than admit they were concerned about your son working for another firm?
AnonymousSeptember 24,2021 at 2:47PM UTC
If this was an IT Consulting or Professional Services company, it is common practice to have employees sign non-disclosure agreements and non-compete agreements. The company feel it protects them against their employees divulging information to the competition / client competition (if you serve client's in a similar industry), protects perceived intellectual property, or the employee being approached for positions directly with clients. Whether the agreements are enforceable is for a lawyer, but I have been required to sign the agreements multiple times for various companies and clients. When a company brings on a new client, they have the client sign non-disclosure agreements as well.
Renee Radcliff SinclairSeptember 24,2021 at 4:57PM UTC
IT is a very idea-centric industry and CEOs (especially founders) are particularly sensitive to possible conflicts. This is a hard reality. If you want to work in IT, I would suggest looking for companies that are in completely different fields than your son (like health care software vs. internet browsers, as an example). It's tough. These industries survive and thrive on the unique nature of their intellectual property and they guard it judiciously. I wish you much success in your next gig.
Karen GongawareSeptember 24,2021 at 6:28PM UTC
EH, he tested you by bad mouthing your ex boss. You acknowledged there was an issue. Right there you were not confidential. And in an interview, talking about kids, pets, friend, or other family is a big no-no. Especially if they work for a rival company. Yes it is a conflict. Then you talked about other clients! Even if you didn't name them, just stating where they worked was another no-no. And a NDA does hold up in court. He just didn't want you and was probably worried you would acknowledge his negative behaviors or casually mention he and the company in conversation. It's ok, interviews aren't about finding the right person, they are to get rid of most of the applicants. Been through my own share, learned from each one. I keep everything work related, just the facts, nothing personal. Keep looking, you will find the right fit.
AnonymousSeptember 25,2021 at 6:21PM UTC
I think it was stinky but I think I’d also avoid over sharing about my family in the future. Women tend to be viewed much more through the lens of their family than men are.