Left toxic job but can't let go

Anonymous

May 13,2022 at 2:51PM UTC

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Left toxic job but can't let go

One week ago, I left a toxic job. It was hard. For a long time, I loved the job. Then, the culture and a series of new hires made it a toxic place.

During my last two weeks, I started the process of purposely letting go of hurts from that job. I journaled my feelings, talked to others, and took time to appreciate my new opportunity. I also took stock of what I could have done differently so that I feel better prepared for the road ahead.

The thing is that I still have a lot of self-doubt. I have literally woke up two days in a row with a feeling of dread and anxiety stemming from what happened on the last job.

I start my new job next week. What tips do you have for letting go and getting my confidence back? Or does this just take time?

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Courtney ChaffeeMay 13,2022 at 3:50PM UTC
It's different for each person. For me, it took time and a series of successful events at my new job. I spent the first while with terrible anxiety though. I would say just focus on what you can control like you've done in your journaling.
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AnonymousMay 13,2022 at 3:55PM UTC
It mostly takes time but if your anxiety and nerves are preventing you from enjoying your life and leaving the past behind you then you might consider some therapy so you are not robbed of all the great things happening in your life.
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AnonymousMay 13,2022 at 4:55PM UTC
I'd talk to a professional.
It isn't healthy to be holding on to something like that after you leave the job. They can give you some strategies for moving on from this and other things n your life. You want to build some emotional resiliency.
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Barb HansenMay 13,2022 at 5:54PM UTC
If you can, get some professional help, even a couple of online therapy sessions.
I left a toxic job about ten years ago, and it took me a couple of years to work through the issues because I didn't "see" that I had issues.
I honor your ability to see the toxicity, that you are aware that the feeling you are having are authentic and come from a real place.
Although I knew I had to leave a toxic workplace (not so much toxic, but I was so overworked, I was mentally exhausted), I didn't see that I was carrying issues with me after leaving the job.
It's okay to ask for help (which is what you are doing here) and if you can get a few therapy sessions to help you move quickly through the issues you have because the world needs what you bring! Please don't let a toxic workplace take more time from you than it already has.
All the best,
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AnonymousMay 13,2022 at 7:55PM UTC
If you can't let go then you identify with some part of the toxicity that you willingly want to drag it with you.
You need to find out why. It's not the fact that it has some lingering effect. It's that you can't let it go.
Therapy can help you unravel what it is you're hanging onto.
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Heather CutlerMay 13,2022 at 8:23PM UTC
There are no awards for suffering. As others have said, please seek professional help to help you sort through everything. You have a high level of self awareness and seem receptive to input. Best luck in your next steps.
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AnonymousMay 14,2022 at 6:05PM UTC
You may have experienced some real trauma where letting go is not easy.
It is good to journal. Do you have a close friend or family member you can talk to on a regular basis to process these feelings? Depending on how extreme your anxiety is try to seek therapy or professional help. Also take an hr Long Walk per day to help burn off that extra anxiety energy. Focus on meditating praying and spending you time when you can to focus on healing
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