Hello, y'all.

Anonymous

June 18,2022 at 12:55PM UTC

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Hello, y'all. I would like to know what options I possess in the scenario below:

Our team has been somewhat restructured due to promotions, transfers, and people either quitting or getting fired.

The new leadership team is an awful mix of ego, lack of empathy and respect, and un-checked tempers. Every day feels like "which level of Dante's Inferno have I walked into today?".

Coupled with the poor leadership team is one team member who is determined to have a tantrums at the drop of a hat any time they don't get what they want. They then go running to leadership and whine, cry, and pout as they spin the occurrence to the point one would be forced to believe that they indeed were the victim in that situation. Unfortunately, instead of leadership taking the high road and actively listening to both sides, they assume that the one in tears is telling the truth and the other party is totally at fault and deserves all the blame.

At first it was tolerable to just be the bigger person and just let it go. Now it's occuring so often that I don't know that this situation will ever get better. I'm not in a place financially that I can immediately resign so I suppose my question is how do I go to my job every day and pretend that it's not eroding away every bit of my confidence, self esteem, and especially my will to show up and clock into work?

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Margaret DobsonJune 18,2022 at 3:03PM UTC
This is tough and I’m sorry you are going through it. Everything you’ve said about the leadership sounds like they will get tired of the drama because it makes them work hard. Try to focus on doing your job. Are you able to document your work daily, as a way of reminding yourself of all the good stuff you are getting accomplished? This same documentation will be very helpful if the dysfunction starts to involve you. In addition, it will help you clearly articulate your worth when you are interviewing for a less toxic situation, either internally or when you are in a position to leave. The one caveat is if the temper explosions are triggering, then you should go to HR. Good luck!
AnonymousJune 19,2022 at 1:13PM UTC
Thank you for your input, I do appreciate it. I have an updated portfolio in the works with the hopes of being able to transfer to another location within the company - the company itself is fantastic, it just seems to have missed the mark when it restructured our leadership team (members who lacked both managerial experience and life experience as well seemed to have moved up for the sake of keeping the promotions in-house).
AnonymousJune 18,2022 at 3:59PM UTC
Exit strategy, make sure you are aggressively applying for jobs.
Keep applying until you are getting interviews at least every few months,
identify all of the toxic people and make a conscientious decision to limit your time with them as much as humanly possible. Before every interaction ask yourself, is there another way I can resolve this without engaging them? And if you must engage, try to do so in writing more so than face to face if you can help it. This is all to retain your peace of mind as much as possible. Also identify their known habits, if they like to go to the break room at a certain time and rant, rave, change your lunch time,
pray, meditate,exercise to destress and shift the pain load away from your spirit and into the garbage where it belongs, train your mind to pump the breaks and stop absorbing negative energy. It takes practice, but once you become more aware of your thought habits, you can shift your thought patterns to positivity. Remind yourself, this is their garbage, not yours and therefore you do not have to take in and internalize their trash, good luck on your transition, you will be ok
AnonymousJune 19,2022 at 1:06PM UTC
Thank you for the advice. I have already been attempting to limit time (however, leadership then gets upset because they swear that my limiting interaction with a known drama queen is causing tension within the department - so I am usually forced to interact with her for the sake of keeping up appearances). I also make it a point to interact with her in written form that way she can't lie about what was said and/or claim that she was never informed - another common tactic of hers. Unfortunately, lunches are set by leadership so I have no control over that other than sitting in my hot car in the parking lot to eat my lunch to avoid eating lunch with her in the break room. I do appreciate the advice, though, it means a lot to me.
AnonymousJune 19,2022 at 1:33PM UTC
The choice is no longer yours - they’re creating a toxic environment that will only worsen. Aggressively apply for a new job. In the meantime, stay far away from the fray and when it comes to your doorstep, don’t be shy about setting up boundaries and being professional. You came to work to work, not babysit bratty adults. If you set a precedent that you are there to perform people will respect you in time.
AnonymousJune 19,2022 at 7:06PM UTC
Document, document, document, and you probably should be looking for an escape.