Disgruntled Employee/Manager

13 Comments

1. AnonymousMarch 19,2022 at 7:33PM UTC

   As someone who has been in this setting before (as the direct report to a manager like that), this behavior should be addressed immediately because it adds to a toxic work environment and allowing it to happen creates mistrust within. Badmouthing and short tempered behavior should not be tolerated, even before reporting structure changes are considered. Give your employee the feedback and opportunity to correct those actions.

2. AnonymousMarch 19,2022 at 7:47PM UTC

   Formal coach & counsel with HR in the room and your supervisor since you'll need strength in numbers. Do not attempt this one on one because she holds no respect for you

   Then deliver a written summary of the meeting (copying all( and laying out expectations. Include consequences and escalating process. Do this before she goes on leave and meet on each infraction with escalating consequences.

   Finally termination if the behavior continues.

   Do not rely on hearsay or gossip of others. Only discuss proven performance issues and personal behavior.

   This requires leadership. Strong leadership. If you need support make sure that HR and you boss and her supervisor support you 100% or don't try any of this. Just ignore it and look elsewhere for a new job.

3. AnonymousMarch 21,2022 at 4:23AM UTC

   Thank you for this advice. The plot twist that I should have mentioned in my original post is that my department is HR.

4. AnonymousMarch 21,2022 at 12:34PM UTC

   Oh well

5. Shelley MunroMarch 21,2022 at 12:43PM UTC

   You said she was promoted 6 months ago. Did she receive any management training? Transitioning from employee to manager means adopting a different mindset that is not always automatic. A discussion about her methods and tactics is definitely in order. Maybe she’s not adjusting appropriately, and pregnancy hormones probably aren’t helping. Having new hires report to you is not a solution, though. That’s going around the problem. If you do that there’s no need for her to be a manager!

6. Paula Manczuk-HannayMarch 21,2022 at 1:21PM UTC

   Had the same thought about the training. If she was promoted without it, it was a great disservice to her.

7. AnonymousMarch 22,2022 at 11:20PM UTC

   Agreed! That’s a big adjustment- some coaching and training would be a great place to start. She may also be feeling insecurities/self doubt about going on maternity leave while still establishing relationships with her team.

8. AnonymousMarch 21,2022 at 1:27PM UTC

   I am not sure when “professionalism” became became being fake… What you just wrote, is what you should tell her… it real, it’s what’s happening, and it’s examples of exactly what she is doing wrong. Again, looking for the oh so perfect “professional” way of telling someone something usually means candy coating it with nice big professional terms. It also means she will leave not seeing any of her actual mistakes, and blame it all on you…. But, that’s America. Don’t speak to the truth, and keep yourself from being sued.

9. Brenda CrawshawMarch 21,2022 at 1:42PM UTC

   Several thoughts here. First, she's pregnant so that will absolutely color how you approach this with her. Do you know her plans for maternity leave? Do you know if she is taking any time before the baby's arrival? Before developing any sort of strategy, I'd get those facts first.

   Then you have two choices - you can sit with her and give her constructive feedback intended to coach her into better performance or wait her out until she goes out on leave. For choice one, you will want to stick to as close to absolute fact as possible to avoid her trying to shift your feedback to criticism around anything having to do with her pregnancy. You're in HR, you're clearly smart - you've got this. Just LOCK it in place.....

   If you go for the second option, you can spend that time doing company wide trainings for communications, company culture and expectations with everyone with a very positive spin. When she returns, you can hand her the "new protocols" and let her know that this is the expectation. The other people in the company will be more empowered to push back against her old ways and you will have a clean starting point you can use to coach, document, warn and possibly terminate her.

10. LovelyBirdMarch 21,2022 at 2:17PM UTC

    I tend to start with humanity - by that I mean remembering that this person is an actual person first before they are a manager. When I see someone is short tempered or not handling things to the best of their abilities, I am learning to train my first response to be one of inquiring whether they are OK before attempting to reprimand or correct. Believe me it’s not easy because for so many of us our first response is to defend against what we perceive as negative behavior. People are whole beings, and their work role is a small facet of who they are. If this person is exhibiting concerning attitudes or behavior, please consider approaching her privately and checking in to ask if she is OK. People have whole lives and go through all kinds of things outside of work that unfortunately can trickle into the workplace. Approach with a heart of compassion. A check in can go a long way to help someone feel seen and heard.

    secondly don’t rely on hearsay unless you yourself overheard some of these inappropriate conversations. People lie all the time so it is difficult to take any action based on what someone else told you that she said. But if you have observed unprofessional or hurtful behavior/speech from her then only speak to those things and nothing else.

11. MARI S PHONASA, CPSM & CPSDMarch 21,2022 at 2:21PM UTC

    I agree with those who already commented to address this behavior head-on and immediately with your employee.
    I was the target of such conversation by a direct report at my previous employer and was corroborated and brought to my management. She would be skyping or sending IM's to her colleagues during meetings about me, and the ones who brought it to my attention said they would tell her to stop and tried to not engage with her. My direct manager consulted with HR, and as it turns out this employee has a file from her previous manager before me as well. My manager was instructed to have a skip-level with this employee and to just bring up the facts. That he has been made aware of some unacceptable comments made by her about her manager to colleagues and that this type of behavior must stop and will not be tolerated. He did not ask her if this was true or not - just plainly stated that it will not be tolerated and it goes against the company's core values. He stated if he were to hear about it again that it would be terms for termination.
    Eventually she left the company on her own accord which I believe is because she was already on shaky ground due to her performance as of late, and me and my manager were in the process of documenting to put her on a documented warning.

12. Taylor ActonMarch 21,2022 at 2:47PM UTC

    Thank you for sharing this example on how you and your manager handled a difficult situation.

13. Leticia V ZamoraMarch 21,2022 at 6:57PM UTC

    I also agree with other comments to address this behavior right away, but first follow your investigation steps and make sure you document this couching, she sounds like she needs training as a newly promoted leader. don't let it go on.