Zero onboarding set me up to fail.

Anonymous

June 24,2022 at 5:48PM UTC

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Zero onboarding set me up to fail.

And failing I am. I don't ever say this lightly, and I'm not saying this out of self deprecation. I was hired apparently as an experienced professional (senior but not leadership) but I've not used any of my past ten years experience, nor is it applicable here - the company has very specific processes and workflows, none of which I was onboarded to when I joined six months ago as my role was supposed to be strategic and overseeing, rather than day-to-day (this is what I was told at interview and in my first week).

My role has now switched in that it now looks after the day-to-day. And I suck at it, I really do. I'm asking a lot of questions, I'm trying to manage things as best possible, but I feel like I'm chasing my tail. I have no professional pride in this job and it finally all came spilling out yesterday when I opened up to a colleague, and I ended up crying. My colleague believes that it's because I didn't get properly onboarded, and the same things was said by another colleague yesterday. Even so, even if it is because of lack of onboarding, the client won't care - they only see an incompetent member of staff.

It's Friday today but instead of feeling like I can relax, I feel tense AF and am already worrying about Monday. I start a new job in October (long story why it's so late but trust me, this was the earliest start date) so in theory I shouldn't be worrying about this and should be counting down until my last day but I am so stressed that I am losing sleep and I didn't eat properly today. I have 58 working days left (excluding holiday).

How can I build my confidence up again after this horrid experience, and how can I make my last couple of months more bearable? I'm not allowed to tell my team yet that I'm leaving. We have no HR function either.

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AnonymousJune 24,2022 at 6:20PM UTC
I think at this point you accept defeat gracefully and do the best you can for your remaining days. Hand off items or tasks that you can't get the hang of and try to keep the rest of your responsibilities as complete as possible. After 6 months, if you can't finish them then just do your best.
For your sanity, focus on selfcare and try meditation to stay in the moment with good intentions. Keep your eye on leaving your current role in the best shape you can manage and forgive yourself. This is not your fault. These kinds if mismatched situations happen.
Your confidence will rebuild on your next job, where there is a better fit for your skillset. Don't expect a big confidence boist until that until you leave. But you can leave with grace if you know you did your best.
AnonymousJune 24,2022 at 7:08PM UTC
Very sorry this is your experience. And I am sure this happens to many people unfortunately. Moving forward, I think a good idea would be to take 1-2 weeks off from work and ask the new job if you can spend at least a week shadowing and observing your anticipated role. It will give you some insight on what to expect, maybe they will allow you to start networking with the new staff and get a head start on preparing. Most people seldom ask for this because who wants to start a job early, especially w/o pay. But sometimes having that upfront insight is invaluable. At the end of the day what is meant for you is meant for you. You may come to find that you are well received in this new environment and all your skills you garnered over the years fit right into what you will do at the new position. Stay positive, dont let this job hurt your spirits. Now that you confirmed a new job no need to stress anymore. With each day you are one step closer to leaving. Let that be your source of light and motivation.
AnonymousJune 24,2022 at 7:13PM UTC
This is a unique situation. But on-boarding is pertinent to the success of workers. I'm not sure how you are in this role but have a new job waiting for you. One of the best tools I use is TEAMs. I have a spreadsheet of all activity and a column for the person who is responsible. If you have a physical representation of workflow, it's easier sometimes to follow and the team to follow. I began a job where there was no workflow so I had to create the basic Excel spreadsheet to keep up with it all. Imagine hundreds of events and multiple activities per day. If this helps, that may get you through the next few months till you can say goodbye and follow a better journey. If you are fairly new, say hey guys, I'm new to this culture/job, but have the skills to help you all succeed, what suggestions do you have so that we can all be on the same page? See what response that offers. I think within a few months they will realize you have mad skills.
Jennifer FlaitzJune 24,2022 at 7:43PM UTC
Breathe, something is not right with the experience. You care.
AnonymousJune 25,2022 at 5:31PM UTC
Take Labor Day week off even if it’s just for a staycation. You’ll be glad you did b
AnonymousJune 26,2022 at 6:04PM UTC
Thank you. I’m not in the US and our next public holidays are Christmas. I do have a two week holiday to look forward to though, which is my next mini milestone.