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Still trying to wrap my head around this situation while sharing a cautionary tale...I joined a company a few months ago and from the beginning had misgivings. There was a 'welcome' lunch where despite my best efforts, I was ignored, there wasn't an attempt to get to know me and upon leaving the room, I felt out of sorts.

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Anonymous

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Still trying to wrap my head around this situation while sharing a cautionary tale...I joined a company a few months ago and from the beginning had misgivings. There was a 'welcome' lunch where despite my best efforts, I was ignored, there wasn't an attempt to get to know me and upon leaving the room, I felt out of sorts.

Leaving behind the training cocoon, bubble, the treatment continued and I was isolated and my actions disregarded. I could tell the team didn't want me there and even when talking with the director and higher leaders, it didn't combat the situation.

While friends and family encouraged me to quit to focus on finding another job, I remained thinking that if I tried harder I could show my value make it work until finding a new role. The degrading treatment started taking a toll on me mentally and physically and yet I persevered as I needed a paycheck. When a family member required health support, the company showed it's true colors and I was denied paid or unpaid medical leave.

The lack of care was the most upsetting as I didn't receive any outreach or support even to inquire about her wellbeing. When a line was drawn, I needed to walk away but I'm sharing my story as a cautionary tale to listen to your gut. I

turned down higher-level jobs for this role. I should have started job searching after realizing the truth. I lied to myself thinking I could change a dysfunctional situation but that only works if the department wants to change. The worst part, is that they know there's a problem and refuse to deal with the situation.

Remember that you can do your best but sometimes you need to walk away from a toxic environment. While that term is tossed around a lot lately, no one should feel abused, belittled or uneasy whenever going to work. If that's what you're facing, take a hard look in the mirror and make an exit plan / strategy.

We spend so many hours of our day at work that while there will be difficult days, you shouldn't feel this level of discomfort on a daily basis. Sending support for everyone facing this challenge and that you're not alone!

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  1. Anonymous

    Sorry you had this experience. Company culture is telling and more important than ever to research and ask questions during the interview. Sometimes the company senior leaders are excited to have you but the local is not. It sounds like you gave it more than 100% and an exit was the best option.

  2. maria rose

    Sorry that you had to go through that situation but I hope that also realized that you made a mistake in signing up to work for this company because it doesn’t give you the best job workplace experience and will do better in next job opportunity. Listen to that gut reaction but also realize that every new job start will make you feel nervous during the beginning, so you also need to use your brain to evaluate the opportunity to see if you can perform at your most comfortable level at this job.

  3. Anonymous

    I'm honestly in the same boat 6 weeks into a new job...

  4. Anonymous

    This is a great post and reminder to us all. However, are you still in this toxic environment? Did I miss the part where you left? Sorry you dealt with that, but ladies, listen up, when you interview, ask questions, the hard ones. Like, may I ask if you have FSL available in case I need to take care of an immediate family member? Or in case I am out with unexpected surgery or illness? Not that we plan these things, but it's nice to know if the company has this policy. For example, in higher ed, we have FSL. It's a relief to know we work in a human being environment instead of a robotic one without feeling.

  5. Anonymous

    I can relate. I’m going through a similar situation at work but had to hold on for 5 yrs. I understand what it feels like to be ignored, dismissed and talked down to.

    I am strong though mentally and I have and will beat them in their own game and ultimately triumph.

  6. Anonymous

    Thank you for sharing your story. It's important to highlight things like this. I'm sorry this happened to you. It can be demoralizing and cruel - and affect your mental and physical health. I can relate. I'd like to add---in some cases that exit plan may require persistence or patience. I experienced something similar. I noticed their behavior a few years in after some personnel changes. I tried to leave for many years (applied to thousands of jobs, networked like crazy). I felt stuck. I agree, trust your gut---and hone your support network. Sometimes folks have to juggle staying at the job to pay the bills (perhaps quiet quitting at work to manage the toxicity) while they hustle for another job. It can be a real fear to quit - esp. if you have no backup support network or finances to cover the loss of a job. If you get to the point where you feel, for your own wellbeing, you must push hard (push back at the employer -perhaps they'd fire you, or quit, or have to sell your house and move)- put those scenarios in your exit plan and take necessary action. Tell your stories, Gain support. Sometimes a big change is required.

  7. Anonymous

    I was in a similar situation and the belittling and nasty comments from "little boys" that the owner loves, was getting to me. However, I wasnt going to quit. I waited it out, sent one "not too nice" email after being denied time to take my husband (a disabled veteran) to an appt,. and bam, they let me go. I have enjoyed getting unemployment, (even though they lied and tried to have it denied), while finding a great gig working from home. Now I am filing an EEOC complaint as they replaced me with a younger person, and I am disabled, which this person is not. While I work from home and draw a good paycheck, I plan to make their lives as miserable as they made mine. Karma. Its a Bitch isnt it?? :)

  8. Anonymous

    I should have added to my post above, it's okay to ask about benefits or salary but to wait until an offer is made. Ask the questions upon an offer. It is completely fair to review the benefit package and ask questions prior to acceptance. If you worry you can't take time off to care for a sick family member, or for yourself, you must find out what employers offer.

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