Little vent session and I could use some sound advice.

4 Comments

1. AnonymousSeptember 25,2025 at 2:39PM UTC

   This is typical of small companies who are growing fast. Talk to management to clear the air on what is expected. Ask when your job description will be updated and if your job class will be given a monetary increase. Decide what to do from then, but understand that they are looking at growth not retention or people's feelings. I am seeing it with the company my adult child works at.

2. PatriciaSeptember 25,2025 at 3:34PM UTC

   I want to acknowledge how you’re feeling — it makes complete sense. You’ve taken on more responsibility than you signed up for, you’re putting in extra time, and you’ve expanded the visibility of your department — all without the recognition (promotion, raise, or additional resources) that usually comes with that kind of growth. No wonder you’re feeling burnt out and angry after that comment about being in the office. It’s not just about one day of remote work — it’s about the bigger picture.

   Here’s how I’d encourage you to approach this:

   1. Get clear on what you want.

   Do you want a promotion and compensation that reflects your expanded role?

   Do you want more support (extra headcount, clear boundaries on workload)?

   Or do you actually prefer to go back to being an individual contributor?

   Knowing what outcome feels best for you will shape the conversation you have with leadership.

   2. Document your value.

   Write down the programs you’ve implemented, the visibility you’ve created, the fact that you’re now managing three people, and the long hours you’re putting in. This isn’t complaining — it’s evidence that your role has evolved far beyond the original scope.

   3. Have a structured conversation with your manager.

   Instead of reacting to the “be in the office” comment, use it as a cue to open up the bigger discussion. You could frame it like this:

   “I want to make sure I’m aligned with expectations as our team grows. I’ve taken on additional leadership responsibilities, and I’d like to talk about how my role, compensation, and support can reflect that. I’m committed to delivering, but I also want to make sure this is sustainable for the long term.”

   4. Be specific about your ask.

   Managers can’t read between the lines — you’ll need to spell it out. Whether it’s a title change, a raise, more flexibility with hybrid, or another hire to lighten your load, be clear about what will make this role manageable and motivating for you.

   5. Protect your energy.

   If the response is dismissive or nothing changes, then you’ve learned what you need to know. At that point, you can either push for a reshaped role (like stepping back to IC work) or start quietly exploring other opportunities. Sometimes detaching mentally — even temporarily — can stop burnout while you figure out your next move.

   You’ve done an incredible job growing with the company, but it’s absolutely fair to expect recognition and balance in return. You’re not being irrational — you’re noticing misalignment, and that’s a signal to advocate for yourself.

   You’ve got leverage here — the company is in growth mode, you’ve made yourself visible, and you’re leading people who rely on you. Use that as strength in your corner.

3. AnonymousSeptember 26,2025 at 4:55PM UTC

   This is excellent advice, well stated. It sounds like you have put yourself in a place where you do have some leverage, agreed. Take a breath, and approach with professionalism, pride and grace. Good luck!

4. AnonymousSeptember 25,2025 at 5:05PM UTC

   Take a deep breath, then schedule time to talk to this person one on one. Explain that you are in the office part of the week and can take care of the things that truly need to be in person during that time. Point out your new responsibilities and your many successes, and explain why you sometimes need to work remotely. Don't quit and don't say anything in a rude manner that would burn bridges, but don't just quietly take it, either. Speak up respectfully.