How do I support this person?

Anonymous

July 14,2022 at 12:35PM UTC

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How do I support this person?

I work for an education nonprofit and recently hired a teacher who just left the classroom to work with me to expand the organization's professional development offerings and overall teacher engagement. I'm also a former teacher but transitioned out of the classroom several years ago and have spent many years in this space.

My new hire has great new ideas but seems to need much more support and encouragement than I had anticipated. For example, although she has completed several new training programs at this point, she still seems to need feedback from me pretty regularly on her drafts, and when I do provide feedback, she's quick to say well, it's only a draft right now. I've been very mindful to be constructive in my feedback, and mindful of that this person will have their own spin and take on things. It's actually something that I want to encourage. In fact, several times during her first week, she told me that I was being too nice with my feedback and that I could be more direct with her. It was quite puzzling because I was phrasing things along the lines of, "You might want to think about x or y. What about if you did c or d?"

Moreover, I find that this person says conflicting things about their desire to be more independent in their role. For example, I'm going to be out of the office next week and asked if she would be comfortable being listed as the next contact alongside my colleague that would back me up before this person came on board. My new hire said sure, that it would be a good way for her to engage with more of our clients and partners and that if she didn't know what to do, she would defer to our colleague. In the same day, she had the opportunity to have a meeting on her own with a potential new partner but when I mentioned that I would be joining her, it became pretty clear to me that this person wouldn't have been comfortable flying solo. I attended the meeting with her and included her on the email update to my boss and asked her to chime in if I missed anything, and she did chime in saying that she appreciated me supporting her in the meeting, and that the more meanings she leads the more confident she'll become, and that she'll be a pro before I know it. Although nice, I was a little confused by this.

Today I asked her if there was anything that she would like to do or work on that she has not yet had the opportunity to do. Since this was a newly created position, there was some flexibility for her to shape the role, and I had done the same thing when I joined the company because I'm the first person in my role. She said no, there wasn't anything she could think of, and was there anything that I wanted her to be doing beyond what she was already doing. I told her that at this point, she was doing what needed to be done, and I would give her more things as they came up. She told me that if she found she didn't have enough to do she would let me know.

I guess I'm looking for more ways to foster independence and confidence in this person, which I'm surprised I need to do given their past line of work.

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Vanda LeeJuly 14,2022 at 12:49PM UTC
It sounds like she has previously worked under a different style of leader and is gun shy about exerting her independence. I would maybe have a conversation with her and ask her what kind of communication she's used to and discuss the style you use and see if there is a common denominator that would be more comfortable for both of you.
AnonymousJuly 14,2022 at 12:58PM UTC
It sounds like she very much wants to impress and fit in, but is in a bit over her head. I know that teachers want to feel like their skill sets could step right into the business world (I see it every day from teachers who start their own WFH businesses), but I can tell you that it would take time and a lot of support to get me, a lifelong business person, to be able to jump to the classroom and teach with ease. Teachers have years of lesson plans and guides to work from. They have years of establishing routines that work well for themselves and their students. It's not the same as what you are doing. You had a learning curve as well. I would sit her down and more clearly explain your expectations. Tell her that she doesn't need to feel anxious or self-conscious about anything she doesn't yet know how to do. She doesn't need to rush to say its a draft. You're a team and you are there to support each other to create your best work. I would schedule 30-60-90-day meetings with her and give her specific performance objectives to support her.
AnonymousJuly 14,2022 at 1:46PM UTC
She's very new. So of course she's a bit hesitant.
To foster independence, you need to assign her projects and tasks with clear objectives and deliverables with regularly scheduled staus meetings and hard deadlines. Then step away. Let her come to you for questions.
I would allow her to ramp up over the coming months. She is transitioning and will need time and space. It sounds pretty normal to me. If you continue to be surprised at her needs then I would have a serious discussion after a couple of months regarding the fit.
AnonymousJuly 14,2022 at 2:06PM UTC
You should rely on the actions and results you hear and see and determine are you comfortable with the output. Some people need more coaching than others before they can step into their own even if they say otherwise. Actions and output is everything. If you are getting the sense she lacks the confidence it is important to explore why and determine if you are comfortable with her pace in her slowly progressing to take charge or be decisive. If you have the time and patience to develop her while she is building her confidence do so. If you drew the conclusion u need someone to step up for leadership abilities to be effective, lean more on your other subordinate on any others who exhibit this skill.
Erin BeemerJuly 14,2022 at 3:39PM UTC
It sounds like you are trying to be fair and constructive but it might help to be more direct with where you would like her to be and provide her with better scope of what that means to you. Which meetings she should lead, types of decisions she should make, when to bring you in. It sounds like she has the desire to be independent but could use a bit more context.
ChristineJuly 14,2022 at 11:37PM UTC
This type of employee can drain your energy. Nip it in the bud quick; sink or swim!
AnonymousJuly 15,2022 at 7:47AM UTC
Ugh, the sink or swim thing is a huge problem. Training and development is a necessary part of having employees. Ever wonder why companies are always complaining they can't find people with the skills and experience to match the jobs they have? It's because of the "sink or swim" mentality. Is supervision training and/or coaching available at your company? Do you have mentoring programs? Did you go over 30, 60, and 90 day expectations? 6 months, 1 year? How often are your 1 on 1s?
AnonymousJuly 15,2022 at 4:47PM UTC
Hi,
We’re a team of less than 10 people, and don’t have mentoring programs or supervision training, and I know in reaching out to my manager the answer will be sink or swim, as it has always been what my experience there has been.
I’m being mindful to do it differently and be more supportive now that I’m managing people. Our 1:1s are a few times a week, always on Monday and then as need throughout the week, and I’m very available through email and WhatsApp between 1:1s. I have gone over the 30 day expectations, and this person is working towards them. I am concerned that my 60 day expectations will be more ambitions than hers based on what I’ve seen and heard thus far.
AnonymousJuly 15,2022 at 4:50PM UTC
To Christine’s post, there have been points when I felt that way that this person was requiring more energy from me to complete certain tasks than should be necessary but at the same time I’m being mindful that not everyone does everything the way that I would or at the same pace or I guess, with the same level of support required.
AnonymousJuly 16,2022 at 10:23PM UTC
I’m reading between the lines here, but I get the sense that you might need to back off a bit.
It strikes me that your efforts to assist might actually be sabotaging your new colleague’s self-confidence.
If matters don’t improve after you’ve backed off, you can reconsider.
On the editing of drafts: be direct and see what happens.