What will taking a sabbatical to focus on being mom do to my career long term?

13 Comments

1. AnonymousSeptember 10,2024 at 5:31PM UTC

   If you can afford to be a stay at home mom, do it. You only have your children for 18 summers. You can always make more money but you can't make more time. If you have been a manager before, there will be manager jobs in a year or even beyond that. If you can afford to stay home, go for it. Especially if you know how to live frugally. And how much money you would save in child care! Shew! One day, naturally, you will want to return to the land of working for pay adults :-) and start looking again. It's okay, take a break, enjoy your family and life. Being a mom is the hardest job and though it doesn't really pay much, it gives back in other ways!

   If you think you are not sure, don't make a decision for another few months. Your heart will be pulled on for a while then if you still feel that urge to stay home, go for it!
   Good luck!

2. AnonymousSeptember 12,2024 at 2:45PM UTC

   Thank you! This is so helpful to hear. :)

3. C DoveySeptember 10,2024 at 7:02PM UTC

   Your kids are only kids for a short while. If you can afford to stay home, do it now. You won't regret it later. If you are concerned about your skills not staying up to date, consider working remotely part-time. Fiver is one example of a way to do this with your marketing skill set.

4. AnonymousSeptember 12,2024 at 2:44PM UTC

   Thank you <3

5. AnonymousSeptember 12,2024 at 6:14PM UTC

   I think you can do multiple things at once, being at your company for such a long time take a month to assess things. Change happens in companies and lives and you are experiencing the same in both, give it time for you to adjust. Additionally, checking the market and having informational conversations -using the excuse when speaking to other companies of seeing what is new in the market and exploring, is always a good thing. Just because you open the window a bit doesn't mean you jump through it. Take the time to consider if a remote role or part time one will work since your child will be the main focus if you are at home, whereas being away from the house means when you are at work you focus solely on work. And lastly taking time to be with your child 100% while your child is so young is something that can not be replaced by a career move. You only get that option once. Weigh out the pluses of that against a possible bumpy path to get back into your career which may or may not happen and the rewards for the time with your baby will likely win out.

   A champagne problem you have and you win no matter what you do.

6. maria roseSeptember 13,2024 at 2:02PM UTC

   What you are experiencing is a reasonable delayed reaction to priorities in your lifestyle ( career and motherhood) that you didn’t have prior to having given birth. Before this happened, work experiences were something that were easily understood and dealt with accordingly, but now they are secondary to your ingrained nurturing instinctive attachment to be close to your child. You are at a fork turn in your life path and don’t want to give up either path—job and motherhood—but to keep both ( especially if you financially need the income from the job—you need to make a compromise adjustment to your expectations. You have 3 clear choices—1.-continue SAHM but lose continued work growth and might possibly leave the job entirely , 2.—Go back to work doing the same capacity plus taking on more responsibilities, while paying childcare for your child , an extra cost to your finances, and progress upwards in your career, and 3. Compromising how much time you spend on work and availablity to be productive that allows you to limit use of childcare and corresponding care costs.

7. AnonymousSeptember 13,2024 at 4:11PM UTC

   I would give it some time before you decide. You may get into a groove after being back. Or if not, you can decide then. In the meantime, you could update your resume and then if you decide you still don't like your current role, look for WFH and/or part time roles. And if it's really bad, leave and take a sabbatical while you search. Transitions with kids take time, so you need to make sure you're allowing the transition to happen before assuming everything won't work.

8. AnonymousSeptember 14,2024 at 12:40PM UTC

   Unfortunately you are the only person that can answer this question for you. I can completely empathize with you, as I was there many years ago. You are at the hardest point, having just been off for an extended time, so of course you want more time with your babies. It’s a huge adjustment to go back to work. I would give it a little time and then decide. I opted to work while they were little, save as much as I could towards retirement and college, and then I took “early retirement” (went to part time work) when my kids were in middle school/junior high. My only advice would be that if you leave to find a way to keep one foot in, whether it is working part time or volunteering, since the world of marketing changes so quickly. I have had a hard time finding roles, even though I have extensive experience. I wish you nothing but the best!

9. AnonymousSeptember 14,2024 at 2:07PM UTC

   Being a SAHM has killed my career, I've been looking for remote work and companies don't look at taking time to be a SAHM kindly. I've been out of workforce for 2 years though. And am having to start back at ground zero from when I was just out of college.

   For me it's worth it though, to be able to spend time with my family. It's up to you if you can take the financial hit though

10. AnonymousSeptember 14,2024 at 3:32PM UTC

    I'd highly recommend starting your own company that way you can set your own schedule and work on projects that make you feel good about what you do.

    I happen to have multiple disabilities and I wasn't able to find a traditional employer that was willing to hire me because of them, however, starting my own bookkeeping firm that I run out of my home has been great for me as it has allowed me to do many things that I wouldn't have been able to do otherwise. For example, I was able to spend as much time as I felt that I needed and wanted to with my mom when she was on hospice, it also gave me the time I needed to focus on my own health after I needed to take time to focus on my own health after having had emergency open heart surgery due to a congenital (born with) heart condition, and currently it is allowing me the time I need to help deal with my husband's current medical situation that he is currently out on medical leave for. All of these things I wouldn't be able to do with a traditional employer, however, since I'm self-employed I'm able to do these things because I'm in full control of my own work schedule. So, if you still really want to work and enjoy spending time at home with your children, I'd highly recommend looking into becoming self-employed. SCORE is great organization that can set you up with a free mentor that can help you decide if becoming self-employed is right for you and your situation currently. Score can be reached at https://www.score.org and the site can hook you up with the local chapter closest to where you live. Good luck on whatever you decide to do.

11. AnonymousSeptember 14,2024 at 4:58PM UTC

    My only recommendation is to find part time remote work. Having something is better than a big gap and no new skills in your field for a few years. I'm my grandma's caretaker full time and have had a remote job at an Ed tech company for two years. It's hard to find but not impossible. You may need to take a massive pay cut but it's still something on your resume to talk about and it keeps me balanced and on a better schedule than when I'm unemployed professionally. Most interviews don't even ask how many hours a week I've worked during this period so it doesn't come up as a major issue.

12. AnonymousSeptember 15,2024 at 11:04PM UTC

    Older mom here, had a potentially prosperous career,... Stepped off the corporate merry go round and invested in my children... Fast forward many years, I was able to advance my education and step back into my career full blast... no regrets!! Our inheritance was invested in our children's development, and they have grown into remarkable adults. You simply cannot put a price tag on that. You are in a time of high emotion and high hormones right now..... Work for a little bit longer and monitor your feelings and adjustment. If you continue to grieve every week, You will have your answer. I learned a long time ago that you can have it all , but not all at once... Electing to invest fully in your child's upbringing is never a wrong choice.

13. AnonymousSeptember 16,2024 at 5:32PM UTC

    Depends very much on your industry, etc, but I'm happy to share my personal story to see if this helps, as I faced a similar choice when my son was born. I never envisaged nor wanted to be a full-time stay at home mom, always driven and career oriented. I planned to take 6 months off, then a 6-month work from home part-time arrangement, before returning to work full time in office (this was back in 2004). The minute my son popped out, I knew I would not want to return. The company were not willing to be flexible beyond the end of the year, so I quit. My husband and I agreed that we would eat spam if we had to to make ends meet...

    I ultimately ended up working from home as a sub-contractor (my background is in software engineering) for about 10 years, making those hours fit around my son's schedule. I returned to a full-time corporate position in 2014, at the same level; so, no clear progression of career in 10 years. However, I rose to director level within 5 years, and now run a business line of close to 100 people.

    When I look back, I reflect that I probably would have gone further up the ranks had I not quit, but I still feel happy with the level I am at today at the age of 54. I have zero regrets as to my choices.