PTSD after leaving a job.

13 Comments

1. AnonymousNovember 19,2022 at 8:01AM UTC

   Oh dear, very sorry to hear. That's terrible you went through such a bad experience that you're still feeling traumatized by the past.

   Maybe try filling your time with positive activities such as prayer (if you're christian or other faith-based), keeping a gratitude journal, getting outsise foor walks, etc.

   Personally I would not pursue further actio. Only prolongs the painful memories being rehashed. Praying that you are able to move on and find joy in your life after that awful pisition.

2. AnonymousNovember 19,2022 at 12:05PM UTC

   It's going to take time to truly get distance. I suggest Journaling to get all that toxic out and on paper. Like a purge.

   Take extra good care of yourself and surround yourself with love and support.

3. AnonymousNovember 19,2022 at 1:44PM UTC

   Sorry to hear this. I was in a similar position in last job due to toxic boss. To be honest sometimes filing a grievance or going to HR/ union does little to help. In last company they deemed it as 2 people that didn’t get along even though there were clearly past issues with this manager and employees. The best thing is that you are out of there as not worth staying in a toxic environment. I recommend speaking to a counsellor and talking through things. It takes time to heal but know that this was not your fault. I am going through a similar situation in current role which is group of toxic team members and started reading 2 books that someone recommended in a similar post on this site:

   Emotional Recovery from Workplace Mobbing: A guide for targets and their supportsMobbed!: What to Do When They Really Are Out to Get You

   there are some really good tips in both books and along with counsellor this is helping as I look for new role.

   Don’t worry about what you didn’t do focus on the future and your healing.

   Know that you are not alone in this and things will get better. Toxic bosses treat employees who are experienced and a threat to them so remember you are an amazing person with talents. Focus on your self care and do things in your spare time that bring you joy. Hobbies, spending time with friends and family and focus on set good boundaries between work and home life.

4. AnonymousNovember 19,2022 at 1:49PM UTC

   I had a similar experience happen to me and it will take time to get over this. I still think you should consult a lawyer to see if there is any recourse. I was incredibly angry that a good job was taken from me because two women were bitches to me. I found counseling reading books about bullying helped I still wish they would fall off a cliff today. You will get through this but go and talk to someone it will help you. This is becoming more of a problem these days.

5. Kimberly G. SmothersNovember 19,2022 at 1:56PM UTC

   Having been there, done that, I know how you feel. You have 180 days under EEOC law to file under one of the classes of discrimination. Cases are hard to prove without documentation. Since you have already left, this may not be possible. In my opinion, the pockets of the legal defenses available to HR at companies are pretty deep. Unless you were severely aggrieved, you may not have the means nor time to bring a sufficient complaint.

   Rather, use your time and energy to reflect on what created the toxic environment and self evaluation. Was there something they or you were doing to cause this environment? Consider talking to a therapist to help get to the root of the problem. This will be enlightening as to what factors made the company toxic and how you can use that intelligence in scoping out your next employer. Someone suggested journaling. It may help to just “get it out”. When you are done, put it to bed and concentrate on your next opportunity and how to drive your success to get there.

   Consider having a professional re-write of your resume and try to tailor your applications to the key words in the job posting.

   Best of luck. It’s all up from here.

6. AnonymousNovember 19,2022 at 2:02PM UTC

   The same thing happened to me. I’ve been out of the job over 2.5 years. I love my new company and have even been promoted. It will do you no good to pursue legal action as it will only prolong the pain. I still have times I think about their adolescent behavior when I see their ridiculous posts on LinkedIn tooting their horn. I’ve had to block their posts. They are dead to you!

7. AnonymousNovember 19,2022 at 2:54PM UTC

   Having recently left an extremely toxic environment at a 'best place to work,' the most important job you have right now is to take care of yourself. It is incredible the damage that is often done to us in harmful environments. We spend so much time trying to make them like us or accept us that we don't realize how we're eroding our health and sense of self-worth.If you have access to good health benefits, use it to find a highly skilled therapist who understands workplace PTSD. Your goal has to be getting yourself whole and ready for your next BEST. It is so important to remember that much of the toxicity women in particular experience has nothing to do with us or our capability. More often than not, it has everything to do with a perfect storm of 'wrong place.'

8. AnonymousNovember 19,2022 at 6:35PM UTC

   They all claim to be a 'best place to work' as they bully you and make you feel like you are the worst employee they ever had until you cry UNCLE and quit. Then you happen to hear from other former employees that they pulled the same stunt on them.

9. AnonymousNovember 19,2022 at 7:38PM UTC

   The "best places to work" lists are nothing more than paid marketing by the company. Kind of like the "geniuses" that have ended up on Fortune only to turn out to be complete frauds.

10. AnonymousNovember 21,2022 at 5:14AM UTC

    I worked at one of those "best places to work" and it was the opposite!

11. AnonymousNovember 20,2022 at 12:48AM UTC

    I can relate having escape a toxic environment and I'm sending you positivity your way. I spent a few years working in a toxic environment due to the pandemic. I was more fearful of leaving so I stayed in that toxicity to have a paycheck. I spent most nights curled up in the fetal position and had too many glasses of wine to settle my nerves as I was so traumatized.

    Before this role, I was social and loved going out with friends. I found myself too tired to even leave the house when I was working from home and then when in the office, all I could think of was to get home to relax.

    Although I'm now looking for a job and it's taken longer than expected, I didn't realize the real damage that role had on me until a few months later. How I allowed to let this senior employee treat me like this, I refuse to let happen again. Please be good to yourself and don't let a job define you. You're so much more than a job and that if they didn't recognize your value, the next place will.

12. AnonymousNovember 20,2022 at 1:52PM UTC

    Workplace PTSD is so real. What you've described is exactly what I went through. In fact, I didn't even look for another job for almost 3 months because I knew I needed to heal. I started therapy twice a week and continue therapy now that I found another job. Because like any other abuse partner, when you get to the next job, things don't magically get better in your mind. You become hypersensitive to the abuse you experienced in that prior environment. It's so critical that you'd be able to differentiate experiences so that you don't self-sabotage and really give the horrible place ongoing power over you. Sending light.

13. AnonymousNovember 21,2022 at 6:13PM UTC

    I can 100% relate to this. I relocated after working for a company for 11 years to help start up one of their new sites. I had loved where I worked before but looked forward to a new adventure. Well, I got there and had the worst management team ever---all of them were from the same area of the country and had zero respect for an HR manager from the south (*insert eye roll*). There was a legit mean girls clique who did everything they could to marginalize me or make me look dumb in leadership meetings. It didn't help things that they were all making more money than I was and most had way less experience.

    I was miserable, but had to stay for 2 years to avoid paying back my relocation costs.

    I had physical medical conditions (including the beginning of a stress-induced heart condition and stomach problems) during my time there.

    Flash forward to my life now---new job, great team, respect from peers and co-workers and no mean girl cliques. :-) Bonus-way more money and flexibility in my role. My health problems disappeared and I don't dread going to work every day.

    While I did let my boss (who was at the corporate level) what was going on, she didn't have enough power to stop the situation as the leadership team was considered top tier by corporate. (She and the rest of the HR department ended up leaving within the year after I did, so that should tell you something.....). I was brutally honest in my exit interview and also left an honest review on Glassdoor, if only to make me feel better and get some of it off my chest.

    Here's hoping time will help you to get past this and find somewhere you truly love that will welcome you and respect you and your talents.