When you are a manager or leader, you model behaviour, like it or not.

Jennifer Challenger

May 12,2022 at 2:26PM UTC

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When you are a manager or leader, you model behaviour, like it or not. Your gestures, words, and habits are carefully observed by those who work with you.

Those in your team who appreciate your model of behaviour will be inspired. If they can't connect with what you are modelling, they will likely disengage and withdraw their best efforts to collaborate willingly with you.

In 1989, Stephen R. Covey published the first edition of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. He proposed using an "Emotional Bank Account" for managing the impact of a leader's behaviour.

The deposits to the emotional bank account are kindness, honesty, integrity, genuine interest, and courtesy, while withdrawing involves disrespect, discourtesy, mistreatment, and harsh criticism.

Staying in credit will lead to more trust between you and your team, and that will lead to a greater likelihood that they will be there for you when you need them and that they will forgive you for the occasional slip-up.

Faking an occasional show of interest or gratitude to take advantage with constant withdrawals will backfire. If you reach a tipping point, no matter how much you try to repair the damage, you will permanently lose the trust of your people, and they will transfer their accounts without hesitation.

❓Nowadays, this tipping point seems to occur sooner than it did in 1989, so what are you doing to ensure that your deposits are regular, unconditional, and authentic?

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AnonymousMay 12,2022 at 2:38PM UTC
This is so true! And for every withdrawal there should be 10-100 deposits.
AnonymousMay 12,2022 at 6:48PM UTC
Absolutely!
My current team leader is moody, impatient and I feel like she does not want me on her team. If she was part of the hiring process at my interview I would have categorically turned down my job offer.
Leading by example is important as behaviour filters down. I’ve worked with some fab managers over the years but this one is a nightmare. Not helped that I am the third person in this role due to the previous two candidates leaving because of her behaviour towards them. That information was shared by a senior manager who is aware of my team leader’s short falls. It seems this behaviour is accepted and used to by the department. I was advised I need to lower my expectations in my job role. As if! That’s poor leadership for you and that’s a reason my job search is on again! Candidate number four in waiting. What a joke.
Jennifer ChallengerMay 20,2022 at 9:06AM UTC
Sorry to hear that. Since you've already decided to move on, I'm curious about what sort of conversation you are prepared to have with this manager. You could be the one to change the status quo here!