No longer a mystery:

No longer a mystery:

Today I sat down with my boss early morning to discuss some organizational changes affecting us:

What it was:

Me listening to 45 minutes of how my direct report out performed me and that they don't want loose them so they're promoting them.

I had to sink that in, I'm upset at both my employer and my colleague but I'm also happy that they have recognized them for the last 4 years. They do an excellent job. But, it came at the cost of my growth stagnation.

What changed:

I set boundaries, I put up my open to work as in open to opportunities in my linkedin. I've met with colleagues and put a face to my name for those I service. I changed jumped when they said jump, although standing up for myself when I began being taken advantage of.

HR: It's important when working in HR to have a team that respects the guidelines and principals in their own field. Not just apply it to the people they service outside of it.

HR has a "human" element to it and that's what's lacking at this and my former institution. Why, I've left and moved on for better pay and a happier environment.

What didn't happen: The respect as a manager to come to me first with this news. I was blindsided but also they couldn't offer me the kind of money for that role knowing how many hours I had worked managing all the tasks, calls, emails, advice requests. I wasn't talked to about what a path to promotion might look like for myself, even though this one didn’t work out, and what things I can work on to better position yourself when opportunities come up in the future.

Lessons: If your boss/employer is not talking to you regularly about an upward growth opportunity for yourself & they make a mindful mediocre attempt at seeing your value. You'll be thinking like me, much happier knowing instead of assuming and planning a smart exit.

I don't want to be stuck in a position I have to prove my worth when others around me including the person speaking knows your value but cannot find a way to promote you except for others and themselves. I'm going to be 40, not being true to my boundaries is not the way I want to conduct my business. Being accepted to be myself, punctual, reliable, dependable, subject matter specialist in my role, executes projects deliverables, friendly, go to attitude. Gone are the days of being taken advantage of. Training someone for their role, no. Helping someone and guiding them to resources, yes. Bailing them out when they can't or don't know how to do a task/project--- this actually takes patience and boundary setting. I'm freeing myself from this toxicity and finding an opportunity that resonates with my deep beliefs.

For anyone else who needs to hear this , we got this!