The frustration is overwhelming.

35 Comments

1. AnonymousDecember 23,2021 at 2:05PM UTC

   Just a wild guess here -- you're a woman over 40?

2. AnonymousDecember 23,2021 at 3:44PM UTC

   OP here. Close, woman 36 years old. Why does that matter though?

3. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 1:20PM UTC

   It shouldn't but unofficially it does. . . Read up on that for yourself.

4. Maggie StoneDecember 24,2021 at 1:53PM UTC

   What part of this story sounds like ageism to you?

5. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 7:04PM UTC

   Because she is getting interviews. It's not her resume.

6. Maggie StoneDecember 24,2021 at 7:17PM UTC

   I am 45, so I don’t deny that ageism is real or that it couldn’t be a factor here, but it sounds more like the OP is getting interviews or offers for jobs that don’t meet her salary requirements.

7. DanielleDecember 25,2021 at 11:10AM UTC

   Bingo Maggie! I was internally applying and got interviews that went no where. The latest was for a company where the salary was a dollar more and commissionable on top. I currently work in retail sales but, very little skills outside of that. I would love to get into recruiting. I have a friend who already works in recruiting and I’ll reach out to her.

   I am the OP. I was hiding under Anonymous for fear of someone recognizing me from my current organization, however, I don’t think that really matters anymore. They should know denying SIX applications with zero feedback is messed up.

8. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 2:30PM UTC

   So agree - it seems that ageism is such a huge thing these days and it’s getting more and more apparent. You are still young but with companies holding close to the small budgets they are either hiring young and cheap or outsourcing. I had a director tell an employee they could hire three people from (country not mentioned) than what they paid her (and she’s over 40).

   it’s absolutely disgusting.

9. AnonymousDecember 27,2021 at 2:30AM UTC

   I am 42 and was surprised to be told that it would be getting harder to find a job.

   I was more "expensive" than the college kid they would hire who really didn't have the experience they seemed to be expecting.

   My experience is in medical administrative support or general administrative work, with specialized computer proficiency (meaning I have supported co-workers with some tech support issues, and I know MS programs).

   I had hoped experience would be valued more.

   I am very happy where I landed after having lost my position of 15 years during the pandemic (dramatic budget slashing).

   Honestly, the job loss was downright traumatic, but the job search process seemed unnecessarily brutal.

   I was told that it generally takes months to find a new job. Many positions I applied for were probably filled internally. The silence felt deafening.

   When I did get nibbles, I felt I wouldn't thrive in those positions but was tempted to accept because I was fearful at not hearing back from jobs I truly WANTED.

   I am glad I stuck it out. I made a connection through a career counseling center that got me where I wanted to end up.

10. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 3:29PM UTC

    While there is no definite answer. I’m in my early 20s and it’s gotten harder to find a job as of late for me as well. Ageism is a consideration for some I’m sure but overall hiring has gotten harder for most regardless of age.

11. Mindy SwankDecember 24,2021 at 4:57PM UTC

    For the same reason it’s harder for larger women to get jobs than smaller, thinner women. And even when larger women get jobs, they’re paid less than thinner women are.

12. AnonymousDecember 29,2021 at 8:30PM UTC

    Mindy, I feel sorry for you that you see this as a thing.

13. AnonymousDecember 30,2021 at 8:58PM UTC

    My boss recently critiqued an interviewees "tight pants" as poor character but her pants were only tight because of her body type. Definitely a thing.

14. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 2:30PM UTC

    Woman over 50 here. If you are getting the calls, it's not your resume. Some would be ageism, if you were older, but unless you look much older than you are. That's not it either.

    There are also a lot of companies posting jobs but not hiring I'm a manager and desperately need new entry level workers. We were allowed to post and interview, then the execs at the top told HR to pull the posting. Now they say we can repost, but I doubt they will actually let us hire.

    I'm looking for a new job too. So frustrating.

15. AnonymousDecember 27,2021 at 7:06PM UTC

    I had the weirdest thing happen recently where I interviewed a woman probably around 50, but then afterwards my boss (who has final say in hiring) remarked that she looked too young. It really struck me off guard because it was open ageism and also just not accurate?

16. Ladyboss659845December 24,2021 at 2:32PM UTC

    I was just offered and accepted a position. I am 60. It was, as the saying goes, a long strange trip to reach this point...truly there is nothing to do but persevere.

17. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 1:26PM UTC

    Take heart and focus on what you do well. Your frustration is understandable and please concentrate on what’s in your control and perhaps work with a career coach who resonates with you.

18. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 1:41PM UTC

    You are not the problem. Recruiters, HR departments, Hiring Managers, "People Mananagers", everyone in a decision making capacity, are all checked out.

    Companies have complicated the hiring process to such an extent that it's amazing any job gets filled at all.

19. Balanced372207December 24,2021 at 2:02PM UTC

    So true. Where I work, employees are offered cash bonuses to find other people who would make good employees. But the "new hires" don't stay because there is too much drama.

20. AnonymousDecember 27,2021 at 2:37PM UTC

    I got the sack from one of my jobs just before Christmas. I relt from day one that I was being gaslit. Being aware of this fact, I repeated to myself that I will refuse to care as long as I get the money. It has long been my mantra that I love money more than I hate my jobs. Anyway, it was always a crapshoot wondering which boss was going to show up on a given day. Jeckyll or Hyde? Like most gaslighters, this particular boss could be quite likable and I was able to diffuse the situation with my stock phrase "Do you see any dead babies around here cuz I don't!!!??"

    Anyway, their official excuse for firing me was that they needed somene full-time (I would never in a million years have given up my one good part time job to work there full time because even though I refuse to allow them to convince me that I suck, it still pissed me off and it was stressful enough just to keep my desire to lash out in check).

    Thing is, and I told them this, I could do the work of the entire office in 15 hours a week if I could have just been left alone to do the work instead of being bitched at for two hours out of every three that I worked. (And a litle advance planning would have helped too. Every time II was on my way out the door, he would pick that moment to try and explain something complicated and impossible to follow. Then he would guilt me saying, "If it is too hard for you I will do it myself!!!"

    Ugh!!

21. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 3:22PM UTC

    This comment is extremely relevant albeit unfortunate. There are many struggling to find employment at the moment and alot of those people have excellent resumes and are qualified. If you’re achieving interviews then your resume might not be the problem at all as it was successful in qualifying you.

22. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 1:58PM UTC

    You need to rewrite / tailor the vocabulary and text of your resume to align with the text of each individual job posting you submit to. Online software recruiting applications filter out even well-written resumes without the exact keywords in the job posting before any human eyes review your application. Only show the last 15 years of experience. No need to show the years you received your degrees if you worry about age discrimination, but 36 is prime hiring age.

23. Ruth RobbinsDecember 24,2021 at 2:34PM UTC

    Not necessarily. It looks like your resume is pulling in interviews. Which is what the resume has to do. It’s the follow up process and the landing where the trip up exists. Use your network to grease the selection process and get your candidacy to the top of the pile. Follow up the interview with short proposals to stay in touch . And do the research to find out what the salary in your field and specialty is bearing. Stay realistic with expectations.

24. Maggie StoneDecember 24,2021 at 2:06PM UTC

    Without knowing the type of position or industry, it is hard to give advice, but I will give it a shot. Do you know the average salary for the types of positions you are applying for? Could you get some additional training, education, or certifications that would bump that up? I don’t think you have necessarily done anything wrong, it may have a lot to do with the market in your area, or the industry or experience level.

25. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 2:43PM UTC

    I’m the same age and was in this situation recently - a year ago I took a job I hated at way below what I was worth because I got tired of doing free work all these companies required as part of the interview process (6 rounds of interviews at least, presentation decks with an entire year strategy that I’d have to do in 2 days- just to get to the final round and tell me they “froze hiring” when really they just got a ton of free work. Now I make double what I was making last year and I’m 3 levels higher on the seniority chain, here’s what I did:

    I stopped for the most part wasting my time on applications that take forever to fill out and spent a lot more applying with “easy apply” like on LinkedIn, indeed, Glassdoor- because it took less time, I could apply to roughly 50 jobs a day in my field- apply while you’re sitting in traffic (not driving ?), waiting in line, watching tv- apply all day long . I wasn’t too careful about what companies I applied to, when I got the interview I later decided whether I wanted to go through with it or not and when the recruiter reached out to me- contrary to what most people say- I asked about salary range! I spent entirely too much time going through tons of interviews just to have them tell me it was ridiculously below my minimum. I just started to say politely- I don’t want to waste each other’s time, could you tell me what the range is. Not everyone will respond well to this but I wasn’t willing to waste my time anymore. You can also check out their reviews on Glassdoor to see what other employees say about salary- FWIW, the company I work for now said salary was low but they agreed to almost double what the going rate was.

    I even paid a resume writer $1500 to redo my resume- I ended up getting a job with my old resume ?.

    Another key factor was applying to INDUSTRIES that pay. I’m not sure what you do but some industries pay well and some don’t. Tech pays very well and well-known companies usually pay very well- I had a job offer that paid more than I make now but was 2 levels below. A year ago I was director, now I’m VP. It’s a frustrating process but I’d recommend sticking it out as long as you can for the right thing.

    I don’t really think it has to do with age but recruiters might think about whether you’ll be out having a baby or have kids already and can’t work endlessly- that’s a story for another post though ☺️

26. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 8:19PM UTC

    Thanks. I never bought into the whole "customizing for each position" BS. I never had any luck with Linkedin or Glassdoor either, but maybe I will start bombarding them (50 a day and not care). Back in the 90's I used to send out hundreds of unsolicited faxes using a fax program that would make each submission personalized as in "Dear ____"

    Amazingly, that was the only thing that worked! The internet ruined all that.

    Is it me or have people abandoned Glassdoor. It seems like there are not as many reviews and what little there are, are not scathingly bad (I for one, always make sure to post a bad experience...because it is the only way I can get a tiny little bit of revenge). I would hate to see this resuorce go away.

27. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 10:46PM UTC

    Yeah that’s true and I can tell you from experience that every company has made me some kind of offer not to post anything negative about them when I leave. In most cases they offered an extra month of insurance. You can post anonymously but the former company can send a letter stating most employees that left signed a document saying they wouldn’t post. Glassdoor has a fantastic and hilarious article about whether they’re legally obligated to release someone’s name

28. AnonymousDecember 27,2021 at 2:30PM UTC

    I have never been asked to sign anything like that. However, it is helpful to know that companies do care about these bad reviews. Makes me more determined than ever to write them.

29. GirlBossanova934974December 24,2021 at 2:49PM UTC

    As someone who had to make 2 major searches in the last 4 years, one has to be honest with oneself. The true METRIC is how many phone interviews, Zoom interviews, Live interviews do you have lined up to start the week? Do you walk into a Friday and have your calendar filled with interviews lined up for next week? If you are doing it right, you have 3-6 lined up. If not, not enough resumes have gone out......Not enough prospecting has been done. In reality, the whole job search business is about being a sales rep. You keep the pipeline full and the sales eventually fall in place. Otherwise, 1 or 2 flakey employers will have an affect. When I had a Flakey Jake or Jill pull a job, that really didn't concern me much. By WED, I was happy to get rid of the Flakey Jakes and Flakey Jills, as I had a real interview lined up an hour later which was really worthwhile.

30. Kathleen ZadrogaDecember 24,2021 at 3:03PM UTC

    I agree that you will need to take a serious look at and review your resume. I've stopped tailoring to EVERY job for which I apply - that got old and tiring. I focused on "hot" areas within my profession (I'm an HR professional - more on that later). I focused on people development, onboarding/ERGs/EAPs, performance, and leadership development for the People Operations/Employee Experience roles; I focused on data for analytical roles, and I hyped up my ATS, HRIS and workforce development for compensation/job leveling roles. Finding those key words and skills and using them in resume is key. No lying allowed - if you don't know HTML, you don't know HTML.

    Next, reach out to your network. Previous managers, colleagues, vendors, suppliers, friends, etc. This should be a conversation, not simply "I'm looking for a job and I'm frustrated". Express knowledge of what they do and where they work (whom they serve) and how you feel you can add value.

    That brings me to my next point - know what you want. Examine where you bring value - what do you offer? What are your unique skills and experiences? This needs to be focused (It is easy to get too much here, I'm an HR department of one - I can rattle off 1000s of things); again, align the values you bring to the role. MOST IMPORTANTLY, what values are important to you? When you enter an organization and start a job, what do you want? Is corporate mission in alignment with your value system? Are the culture and employee development important? Do you need to grow and have options? Do you need to see philanthropic/community involvement from your organization and leaders?

    I've been through this - for 9 months of unemployment - I wish I could offer more. A new role that I took in January was eliminated in April due to COVID. Over 35 years of professional, successful employment and I was out because of the virus. I did not agree with the decision because a company of almost 200 spread across the U.S. needs an HR professional, I understood the tough business decision behind my job being eliminated. The frustration is real - recruiters ghosting me, up to four interviews with direct leaders and no reply, researched and developed a project (over 3 hours) for one role, presented it as part of 4th interview and never heard back. I had three interviews with one organization, numerous participants for interview two and three. No response. I tried emailing with follow-up; email addresses were rejected. Did they give me false email addresses? Stick with it. Once you know what you truly want and what is truly important, it will all make sense and come together.

31. AnonymousDecember 24,2021 at 7:32PM UTC

    Last year, i sent 160 resumes (most were tailored to the soecific job) and cover letters over three months. i received one screening by a recruiter, which went nowhere. One kept emailing every month for three months before they canceled the position altogether, and one interview that i ended up getting. I applied July, and heard bavk late August, and got hired two months after that. In all these apps, maybe one or two rejections flat out. And that was it! 2 instances of talking to a human being. Less than 1% return of any sort. I have a PhD, am a data scientist, and over 10 years experiences in teaching and research. The point is, it is really not you. It is a numbers game. All you need is one "Yes". Getting there might take a while. Average time i know from start to end is 6-9 months. Hang in there! This is frustrating.

32. Gretta PerlmutterDecember 24,2021 at 9:14PM UTC

    Thank you so much for sharing your experience. I love how you wrote, "2 instances of talking to a human being." Sadly common courtesy is not so common anymore! You have a great attitude about what a job search is - strictly a numbers game. Good on you for staying strong and holding out until you got hired!

33. Maureen DrinkwaterDecember 25,2021 at 4:33AM UTC

    Are you applying for any positions with the help of internal referrals from former colleagues and supervisors or other networking connections? If you are not doing so already, it might be helpful to tap these trusted resources. Someone you trust who is willing to help would steer you toward positions suitable for you. While it is possible to secure employment by applying online for jobs at organizations with which you have no ties, it might take much longer than finding a job through networking.

34. DanielleDecember 25,2021 at 11:14AM UTC

    Hi friends!

    OP here, thank you soooooo very much! Great advice here and I’m going to utilize all of it. I thought my resume needed to be revamped but it sounds like I should work more on personal development.

    One thing I’d like to add on why I am leaving my current position. Six interviews, one offer well below salary minimum, and ZERO feedback. Even after the last position toted they “value internal candidates and we must take care of them”. I’ve begged for feedback and nothing.

35. Robyn McCabria KelsoDecember 28,2021 at 1:32PM UTC

    Unfortunately this seems to be the norm. I was looking for new opportunities in early 2021 and I was appalled by the interviewing and hiring practices that seem to have sprung up since I last interviewed two years prior.