My position was eliminated in October and I am still in a daze.

49 Comments

1. Audrey WatsonNovember 7,2025 at 2:09PM UTC

   Hi there,

   I’m truly sorry you’re going through this. Losing a job can feel like losing a part of yourself, especially when so much of your identity was tied to it. Please remember — this is a moment, not your ending. You will rise again.

   I say that because I’ve been there too. I’ve lost several jobs — some due to layoffs, others because I was let go — and each time, I found my way back. You will too.

   It’s okay to grieve what you’ve lost, but don’t stay there. Reach out for support — talk to a therapist, connect with loved ones, or take a walk to clear your mind. Small steps lead to big healing.

   Consider volunteering or helping someone else in need. When we shift our focus toward helping others, we often rediscover our own purpose and strength.

   You’re not lost — you’re being redirected. Keep the faith and hang in there. You’ve got this. ?

2. AnonymousNovember 7,2025 at 2:12PM UTC

   You are not a failure. Don't even start to believe that. You are facing a situation that many others are also facing. I don't know what you do, but you've been doing it for almost 9 years. You have experience and you aren't someone who hops from job to job. Your job was eliminated, but your skills remain. Don't sell yourself short. If you can't find something immediately, take a holiday job to get by. Screw the word "failure".

3. AnonymousNovember 7,2025 at 2:16PM UTC

   just matter of time, you will be back. Great suggestions from Audrey Watson below. The universe has bigger and better plans for you. Happy Birthday in advance.

4. Barb HansenNovember 7,2025 at 2:56PM UTC

   First — you were not eliminated. Your position was eliminated. There’s a big difference. Your job was removed for business/economic reasons, not because of your value or your worth. Please don’t attach this to your identity, layoffs are a company problem, not a personal failure.

   I know it’s scary, especially when you’re navigating this on your own and the world feels very loud and uncertain. Try to give yourself the same compassion you’d give a friend in your shoes.

   The following are tactics that have worked for me when my roles have been eliminated and, like you, I was/am the sole income provider.

   Seek new opportunities (actively, not passively)

   ** If you’ve spent your career in education, look at roles in corporate training, instructional design, or enablement roles.

   ** If you’ve been in large corporations, consider startups or smaller companies where your experience is a superpower.

   Expand your network

   ** If networking feels overwhelming, start small. Go to one Meetup or industry event a month with a simple goal of talking to 3 or 4 people. You don’t need to “network.” Just have conversations.

   ** If you are great at networking, then fire up those skills.

   Build new skills your way

   ** Take this time to explore new skills or sharpen the ones you already have.

   ** New to AI? Try a short course. “AI for Everyone” by Deeplearning.ai is excellent, easy to digest, free, and only ~6 hours.

   Explore income on your terms

   ** Do you have skills that could be packaged into consulting, freelancing, or a side hustle? Even small wins can build confidence and momentum.

   And finally — you are absolutely not alone.

   Please connect with me on LinkedIn (link in my bio). I’m happy to be part of your network, and if somebody in my network is hiring and it aligns with your experience, I will gladly make a connection.

5. AnonymousNovember 7,2025 at 9:58PM UTC

   Agreed here, great suggestions. :) Happy early birthday. Keep your chin up and never discount your worth!

6. Elizabeth Stiles WestNovember 8,2025 at 2:02PM UTC

   Do your best to have a great birthday! You're not a failure. I think that late-stage capitalism is not doing so well right now; the employment market is terrible, but it isn't your fault. Welcome to the 58 club; I've been 58 since September and am gearing up for a class of '85 reunion next weekend. Nearly 10 years ago, I was in a position similar to yours. I had a wonderful job teaching at ITT Tech, until abruptly first eliminated full-time positions, and ultimately closed its doors completely. There I was, a divorced mother of two, and I'm an only child. Both of my parents had passed away prior to this, so I was truly on my own. Somehow, I made it. For 9 months, I juggled several part-time jobs because it seemed impossible to get a full-time position. With a lot of online applications, I never even got an interview, much less a job, and I began to suspect it was ageism. Those applications asked questions about what year did I graduate, and I think that when it saw the dates starting with 19 instead of 20, it kicked my applications out. What finally worked was writing a cover letter in which I acknowledged my age and indicated that it's actually an advantage because I have experience, I hardly ever miss work, and with my own kids old enough to take care of themselves, I won't miss work for childcare issues. I also emphasized that I keep up with new technology and work well with people of all ages and backgrounds. It worked. I got the interview and then the job. Think about what you have overcome in your life, and remember, you survived shoulder pads, parachute pants, and bad perms. You've totally got this! Happy birthday!!!

7. AnonymousNovember 9,2025 at 5:50AM UTC

   Try upskilling when you are job hunting. Even though ageism is a factor, upskilling helps impress the employer that you are current with the trends and may help you land jobs faster.

8. AnonymousNovember 9,2025 at 1:34PM UTC

   Happy Blessed Birthday. You are not a failure. Keep it moving and if you need morale support reach out to me. I am 63 and just started a new job.

9. Melissa GreenNovember 9,2025 at 1:38PM UTC

   I really understand how you feel. My role was also eliminated in September and I too feel like I'm in a daze. I haven't had the motivation to go as hard as I used to with finding something else. I believe it's ok to give yourself a mental break but remember you are in a circumstance beyond your control and you do not deserve to beat yourself up about it. I would recommend keeps gratitude journal to help you get through this phase and give yourself grace and time to bounce back.

10. AnonymousNovember 9,2025 at 1:51PM UTC

    Im sorry for your situation. I am in my 50s and faced 2 layoffs in a span of 3 years. Both after stellar performance reviews. Both were included in smaller quiet layoffs. The ones where they dont have to disclose ages of who else is impacted.

    While looking can be extremely draining, it is super important that you take care of yourself during this time. Enjoy nature, join a class (for anything), focus on what gives you joy.

    I still remember a layoff 15 years ago where I was out for 9 months. Got in the best shape of my life. And every morning would jog along the lake. Enjoyed that part.

11. Mira HornbeakNovember 9,2025 at 10:20PM UTC

    I wholeheartedly agree. Bring some joy into your life because you deserve it. There is no loyalty with companies anymore and ageism is very real - even if many don’t believe it. So again, I agree take care of yourself, get into whatever fitness program you can find to help your body and your mind!

12. GirlBossanova934974November 9,2025 at 2:34PM UTC

    Being single and losing your job is one thing. However it is greatly amplified when there are other people counting on you for that check. I am over 60 and I have lost 3 jobs since 2018. I recently started up another role after being out of work for 9 months. My take? These companies are NOT NOT your friends or family. Most are very poorly managed aka run by so called managers who are for the most part, barely qualified if not completely incompetent. Your job as a senior experienced worker is to sell your experience. Prevent the really really stupid stuff from happening. Add value. FIND the organization that respects that. Avoid applying to outfits where the job description is loaded with all sorts of catchy slogans and have nothing with do with ACTUAL qualifications. MAKE sure your skillsets are up to date. Take off all references to dates except for the dates you worked at XYZ. Get that Linkedin profile looking good and filled out. Make sure you reference all software skills.

13. AnonymousNovember 9,2025 at 4:20PM UTC

    Wow. Happy birthday! YOU ARE NOT a failure. Even if you were fired for cause …. You wouldn’t be a failure. It’s really a shock getting laid off for your first time . Especially if your identity is strongly tied to your job getting let go can be devastating. It throws us into all kinds of fears of being shunned etc. It’s very primal. But it’s all based in fear and not real. So! First of all make sure you’ve taken care of yourself financially… apply for unemployment right away. Put together your budget so you can assume you will be out of work for at least a year. Take yourself on a nice 3

    day weekend either alone to a spa or some place fun with a very good best friend who likes to make you laugh and doesn’t take any of this too seriously. When you get back update your resume, and start the work of being good to yourself. Good luck.

14. AnonymousNovember 9,2025 at 8:04PM UTC

    First, Happy Birthday! I send blessing and prayers to you. I understand how you feel, it’s quite hard to explain the emotional toll that a job lost later in life can have on your self esteem. I’m 59 and I lost my job as well in June. I constantly remind myself that I am more than my job. Most importantly I as well as you still have so much to offer! Keep your head up and maybe be prepared to reinvent your amazing self!

15. AnonymousNovember 10,2025 at 2:13PM UTC

    First of all, happy belated birthday! if it's any consolation, please know that you're not alone in this. Scores of folks have lost their jobs in recent months due to no fault of their own. Secondly, you're NOT A FAILURE. Failure to me means being utterly hopeless. And I can bet that it's NOT YOU. Take the time to grieve your loss. You're entitled. Rant, vent, cry or whatever you need to do to get past it. Then, after it's out of your system, make a plan and take one step towards carrying it out. Is it easy, no. But it's worth it if it's going to get you re-engaged in your life. All the best. Praying for you too!

16. AnonymousNovember 10,2025 at 2:28PM UTC

    Happy birthday and I agree with most of the other comments. You ARE NOT A FAILURE, but I understand how this type of situation can make you fell that way. I just went thru my 3rd downsizing of my career earlier this year and am now back at work. Sometimes God closes a door to help direct you to & through a better door of opportunity. Allow yourself to grieve the loss and then start networking to find the right next opportunity for you. You’ll be amazed at how many people will be empathetic to your situation and will try to help you in your job search. Finally remember that the length of your job search does not need to mimic anyone else… when the time is right you will land at your next job. Best wishes!

17. AnonymousNovember 10,2025 at 3:50PM UTC

    You are not alone! I also lost my job this year and I am in my 50’s. My company was a nonprofit that lost funding and all paid staff was laid off (most likely for good). I had a few interviews, but so far no offers. I feel alone but have found many in the same boat including my next door neighbors. Keep positive and keep looking. Persistence pays off, two of my former colleagues found jobs, so there’s some hope. While it is true that the current political culture doesn’t love women in their 50’s , there are jobs out there. I hope you find something soon!

18. Changemaker828603November 10,2025 at 4:41PM UTC

    It will be fine. I have found several jobs at age 60. But,I had to be realistic on what was important to me. 1. Health insurance. 2. Location.

    I have a professional degree, and I found a job in a different field, which is fine, I took a significant cut in pay, but since it met my top 2 criteria, it is okay. Staying here until I retire.

19. GirlBossanova934974November 10,2025 at 4:50PM UTC

    It is unnecessary to think that most people are playing by any set of rules these days. `It's greed, greed, and more greed and whatever I can get away with. Organizations overrun by dirty office politics. `if one understands that, one realizes that a layoff is not your fault and one moves on quickly.

20. Lorraine StaffordNovember 10,2025 at 10:59PM UTC

    You’re right that It is hard and scary. But, YOU ARE NOT a loser. Hardly a loser. You were at the company for 8+ yrs and that shows stability and you can be counted on as an employee. Stay positive and do enjoy your birthday. Show self-love. Then in few days hammer out your resume yo as many leads, job boards and find a recruiter to help you along in the job market process. It’s competitive but you’ve got maturity on your side, longevity in a very current position and tenacity. You get up in the morning and stay focused and tackle the day. If you need a breather from the job search… do yourself a favor and take time out for you. Then go back and hit it again.

    We are all on your side sending good vibes. Good luck with everything.

21. AnonymousNovember 11,2025 at 1:38AM UTC

    Happy Birthday! As another person said, you were with a company for 8+ years so that clearly shows stability and that you can be a great employee. I am 68 and have been hired twice since I have been 60 so it is possible. You just need to defy all stereotypes and stay positive. Demonstrate that you have a growth mindset, are always wiling to learn new things, are comfortable with technology and remove all content older than 15 years from your resume. Good luck and stay positive. Take some actions tomorrow even on your birthday to network on LinkedIn. You will feel better just moving forward and will eventually move away from the daze.

22. AnonymousNovember 11,2025 at 5:38AM UTC

    I’m sorry and you’re not a loser! Life just happens to everyone unfortunately. Hang in there!

23. Tamayla RossNovember 11,2025 at 1:10PM UTC

    Take this time to think about a career change

24. AnonymousNovember 11,2025 at 1:31PM UTC

    I'd like to point out that after 8 years and 10 months, that company failed you, not the other way around. You're smart, capable, and will find something else. Another company will be lucky to have you!

25. Colleen DillNovember 11,2025 at 1:48PM UTC

    I agree with Anonymous. You were there for 8 years!! That is not failure on your part!! They let you down and failed you. I’m also unemployed, since July and will be 58 in the not so distant future . It’s hard at any age to get out of our own way when this gains and be positive. It’s taken me a few months to realize this. You can’t force positivity! You are allowed time to grieve for what you had but don’t go down the rabbit hole !! I did a little ?. I do keep getting interviews and people are reaching out. I have found some amazing people who are willing to help with interview prep, research and more just by reaching out. Don’t be afraid to ask your network for help!! People will often surprise you. I wish you so much luck and remember you got this!! Happy birthday ?

26. Erica LanyonNovember 11,2025 at 1:50PM UTC

    I'm so sorry. I see many kind and thoughtful pieces of advice below. I'm in the same boat as you and sometimes it's hard to listen to advice when you're still processing the emotions. Please connect with me if you would like someone to talk to.

27. AnonymousNovember 11,2025 at 2:13PM UTC

    As a single 50+ woman who recently started over at a new company. Giving up is not an option. Take a breather , check with your former company if they will pay for outplacement services with a career coach and gear up for the next role. Good luck to you.

28. Diane KingNovember 11,2025 at 2:56PM UTC

    You’re not alone — I’ve been there too, and it’s incredibly hard. Please know this moment doesn’t define your worth or your future. Take it one step at a time, and be kind to yourself. You’ve come this far for a reason. ?

29. Jeffrey “Jeff Knauf” KnaufNovember 11,2025 at 3:39PM UTC

    You are not alone and you are certainly not a failure. I was laid off in June, it also hit me hard and I understand where you are coming from, they eliminated the position, nothing you are going to do. Happy Birthday, try and find some joy in each day and look at this as a new beginning! God will bless you

30. Michelle GreenidgeNovember 11,2025 at 3:39PM UTC

    I understand the fear and uncertainty of losing one's job at this age and being single.

    I'm 59 and my position was phased out after 18 years and my options were taking another position with a significant salary cut or take a package, which may not last very long.

    I took the job and am struggling while looking for another job because I thought that was the better option but to date I haven't found another job or position in the company.

    I've been questioning my decision every day because I'm so unhappy.

    I wish you goo luck and blessings as you navigate your future. I pray that you find the right job soon.

31. AnonymousNovember 11,2025 at 8:52PM UTC

    You did the RIGHT thing even though it was a huge pill to swallow. No one is hiring old people! (I'm 57 and I've been looking for 2 years.

    Grin and bare it. Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

32. AnnMarieNovember 11,2025 at 4:34PM UTC

    I highly recommend a book titled Never Search Alone by Phyl Terry. With it comes a step by step playbook that guides you through discovery about what you're good at and what's important to you now. In addition, sign up for a free Job Search Council that you will go through the playbook with. You are there for each other every step of the way and you are never alone :) Happy to connect on LinkedIn if you need a sounding board. I've was separated in August from my company after 18 years.

33. Devraj RGNovember 11,2025 at 4:59PM UTC

    Happy Birthday, I hope you get a better opportunity soon.

34. Milissa JacobsNovember 11,2025 at 7:01PM UTC

    Happy Birthday, stay calm and try to enjoy your day. You aren't a failure; you just got a horrible surprise. I'll keep you in my prayers.

35. Jennifer A.November 11,2025 at 7:05PM UTC

    Hi there. I can empathize with being alone and just having a birthday. I’m so sorry you were let go. Take time to grieve.

36. AnonymousNovember 11,2025 at 8:48PM UTC

    Don't feel like a failure. It's not good for your mental health. I was laid off my company for two years (11/4/23). I have struggled every day and I'm at the point where I am borrowing money from a friend. I'm super desperate, but in June I totaled my car when I feel asleep at the wheel. Fortunatly I just crashed into two major rocks. My car was totaled, but they are right about one thing, when you are asleep at the wheel, you don't get injured. Well, I banged up my elbow, but considering what the car looked like, I did fairly well.

    Fast forward to today and I am being tested for everything... heart, MRI of head, MRA of the head, EEG, and Sleep studies.

    Apparently I have spikes on my EEG that read like a seizure disorder. However, they think I also have Narcolepsy. Great, huh?!

    I've been looking only for jobs that I can do remotely...but no one likes to hire over 50.

    So, feeling like a failure will not help you or me. Get your butt up everyday and apply places. As my Mom used to say, 'you can get 1,000 no's because you only need one YES.'

    Do something nice for yourself tomorrow. Volunteer to get out of a mental slump. Pets are wonderful to pull you out of things too, so you could volunteer at a shelter. If I have a car, I would!

    Good luck to you. You will be okay.

37. AnonymousNovember 11,2025 at 10:20PM UTC

    Keep you head up , one thing is for certain you are not going to fail u may feel like it but you won't meet that destination . I pray that u merge into something you love and still you are getting paid for it!

38. AnonymousNovember 11,2025 at 10:21PM UTC

    I’m 58 was just laid off for 6 months, collected unemployment and just received an amazing opportunity with pay that is higher than I’ve never made!

    Be positive, surround your self with positive people and pray. You got this!!

39. AnonymousNovember 12,2025 at 3:17AM UTC

    Don't fret. I had the same thing happen to me after being employed by the same company for 20 years. The company closed due to covid. I was also in my late 50s and single.

    Long story short, I was unemployed for about 18 months (it was during the pandemic) but finally got a job that paid twice my previous salary. I've been there almost four years now.

    Things always find a way of working out. Have faith.

40. AnonymousNovember 12,2025 at 1:42PM UTC

    Not your fault! And this happens all the time to very successful people. Just focus on doing a bit every day to further your search and then something for you everyday. Its a long process, but you can do this.

41. AnonymousNovember 12,2025 at 6:14PM UTC

    I had this happen at 57.5 years of age. I am sole paycheck here (spouse not working x 10 years; not on disability). I had a perfect record, long standing. but didn't know that my employer terminated an entire service line...so I was let go (later, 5 more peers were let go). Horrific experience. You feel like you've been dropped off a cliff. No pay, no benefits. You also feel ashamed, though you did nothing wrong and everything right. But please, OH PLEASE...stop the negative self talk. It's only a few weeks; you are still in the very tender "ouch" stage. this takes time. But in the meantime, do NOT make mistakes...such as talking about ANY OF THIS on social media (Facebook, Instagram). Stay under the radar. File for unemployment. Ofcourse, cut back on EVERY unnecesary expense and subscription. You'll learn to live on a dime! (the year it happened was right before Christmas; I sold $450 worth of stuff on Facebook Marketplace and used the $$ for Christmas). You are joining a legion of millions right now in your same situation. Corporate America is ruthless. You're just a number to them (that was a hard lesson for me to learn). Use your network to possibly find new work. Update LinkedIn. But be aware: the holidays are coming and year end budgets are capping- so you might want to wait until after Christmas to start a new job hunt. Stop any negative talk about yourself or the situation. You have to get EXERCISE every day, self care, do volunteer work, pray, talk with friends, visit the zoo. Promise: you WILL move on, realize some things, learn new things, and perhaps find a new balance. Trust the universe.

42. AnonymousNovember 12,2025 at 10:15PM UTC

    I hear you. I turn 50 next week and I was let go due to "performance issues" after being targeted since 2017 within the same "clique" group. Never put on a PIP or any substantial evidence to backup any performance issues - they just didn't like me. I've had to take time off throughout the years due to the impact on my health and to this day cannot make myself open up my resume to apply - imposter syndrome has hit hard despite being a thought leader in the community. I know I have to do some inner work and get going - to keep the roof over my head and for my family. I'm taking each day as it comes even though I can barely function on most days. I'm trying to incorporate small bouts of self care even though its really hard - and even trying to gather all my skills so I can potentially try something solo. Give yourself grace and try to carry out small actions - its not easy but we have to try as we deserve better <3

43. AnonymousNovember 12,2025 at 10:49PM UTC

    This could have been posted by me! You and I are right around the same age, and I had been at my job for over 15 years. Reading some of the replies to your post tells me there are more of us in this same situation than I would have thought.

    That job ended in October 2023. In February 2024, I found a part-time job that I absolutely love! But I am having a terrible time finding another part-time job to bring my income back to the level it was previously. Bills are piling up, and I definitely feel like a failure in some aspects of my life. I am so desperate for income that some days I just want to curl up and cry.

    I pray that you and I and all the others in this situation can get out of this hole soon!

44. AnonymousNovember 12,2025 at 10:52PM UTC

    I'm single and over 65 - was laid off earlier this year after my c-suite executive retired. Haven't been able to land a new job. Most of the positions are MUCH lower pay than I've been paid (and deserve with my years of experience supporting c-suite executives). I'm not sure if my social security benefits will be able to sustain me without working at this point due to the economy.

    I don't feel like a failure, though can certainly understand your feelings. It is hard! There's hope and you can rally -- use your time wisely (I love fitness, so have been in group exercise classes several times per week with some great like-minded people).
    I've revamped my resume and have continued to apply for positions (as unemployment ended after 6 months).
    Blessings on your journey.

45. Lori DolanNovember 13,2025 at 2:11PM UTC

    I feel so much for you. I am 54, I went through an unwanted divorce as my now ex-husband completely blindsided me. And to say the job search has been brutal and humiliating is an understatement. I actually recently took a job as a receptionist thinking okay you know what here's where I'm at right now until the next thing comes along. I have to say I could not have found a better group of people or a more compassionate company. I thought to myself maybe this is where I need to be instead of trying and failing to get ahead in my industry that I have decades of experience in. Have you thought about applying to industries that may be able to use your skills but you never quite thought of looking at before? And it is a weird time because all of a sudden everybody is getting hired around this time when in the past it used to be nobody got hired around the holidays. I wish you all the best.

46. AnonymousNovember 14,2025 at 5:03PM UTC

    You have a right to continue to be part of whichever industry you were part of for so long, you have wisdom and institutional knowledge which many could benefit from.

    Good for you for finding an environment where you are treated well, can your previous skills be utilized there at all?

47. AnonymousNovember 14,2025 at 5:01PM UTC

    Eliminated last year in my early 50's - had been in a specialized field since Y2K, which suffers from rampant ageism. Pivoted to a field which celebrates age as experience and wisdom, it has been a difficult transition, but I believe worthwhile.

48. Farah BajwaNovember 14,2025 at 7:39PM UTC

    I'm so sorry! I was laid off unexpectedly after 9 years. I have a feeling it was to get me before I was vested. I was single and yes its very scary.

    1 - if you haven't already, IMMEDIATELY file for unemployment with EDD

    2 - take a moment to process your emotions and be kind with yourself.

    3 - brush up on your resume and network. Networking is the best way to get a new job

49. AnonymousNovember 20,2025 at 2:57PM UTC

    I'm so sorry! I was laid off in August of this year after 19+ years. Total blindside and it happened the Monday I came back from a week vacation. I just turned 61 in September. Still no luck on the job front, but I just try to stay positive and keep plugging away. Good Luck!