I work with an admin asst who is suppose to support a lot of what I do.

24 Comments

1. AnonymousJune 15,2025 at 12:15PM UTC

   To be clear, it's not your cabinet, it's the companys cabinet. Consider labeling it with the types of files will be stored in there. As far as your admin. have a sit down, from the snapshot, and finish reading all of this, it's a you thing. Hear me out. Ask her how they feel it's going, ask what help they need or tools and resources they need in order to help support the needs of your 'team'. Listen to them. Acknowledge them, get out of your mindset and see where they are at with theirs. Create an action plan together to build a stronger process that takes their ideas and yours. Ask if they'd like to grow in their career and provide tasks that would support that. Be excited for their growth and once you've done that, address the behaviors and concerns with 'I' not 'You'. It will not be an overnight fix, in this you are empowering them to take ownership of their role and growth. Then it's up to them. Be present.

2. Barb HansenJune 15,2025 at 12:33PM UTC

   You may be unintentionally providing cover for the admin assistant. If she’s supposed to support you but isn’t, and you just absorb the extra work, your boss has no reason to step in—because from their perspective, the work is still getting done. That makes it your problem to solve, even though it shouldn’t be.

   You can choose to keep picking up the slack, but if you don’t want to, here’s one way to handle it:

   When you're asked to take on something new, bring it to your manager and say:

   “My workload is already at capacity this week. I’m happy to take this on if there’s something else you’d like me to deprioritize—otherwise, I won’t be able to fit this in.”

   If they ask why, you can calmly explain that you’ve been absorbing tasks that should be handled by the admin, and it’s just not sustainable. Keep it focused on workload, not personalities.

3. AnonymousJune 15,2025 at 1:22PM UTC

   I would stay in your lane and not focus on her or her work load. Fighting her is a losing battle.

4. AnonymousJune 15,2025 at 6:44PM UTC

   I don’t want to fight her, but I don’t want to be walked on either.

5. AnonymousJune 15,2025 at 11:16PM UTC

   Then you concentrate on divvying up the work. If you assign something to her you follow up and copy your boss. He asked that you figure it out. Focusing on her scrolling and how she is not busy is not the way to professionally go about working it out. It's more a way to reduce the issue to a fight. It makes you small.

   You work it out by professionally documenting the issue of assignment and offering to discuss it with your boss and her.

6. BarbaraJune 16,2025 at 7:58PM UTC

   Getting walked on is not what’s happening here. You are being distracted and trying to compel her to do what she doesn’t believe is her job. Stop it. Give her a chance to help you and if she won’t do it yourself and don’t utilize her anymore. Your boss told you to work it out, he/she didn’t help you so she could be one of those colleagues that has some special status and you don’t want to get entangled.

   paddle your own canoe and mind your business and enjoy your job.

7. GirlBossanova934974June 16,2025 at 1:06PM UTC

   Reading more and more of these situations these days. The case of the missing manager, aka AWOL Alvin aka they are paying me to manage a group of employees but I can't be bothered. As one reader has pointed out, it is time to force the missing manager to do his job.

8. AnonymousJune 16,2025 at 1:21PM UTC

   Question, does the Admin solely support you or do they support others in the office? Are they following their job description or going above & beyond? As an Admin I’m often asked to do tasks above & beyond. Filling my work day. Just wanted to see another perspective.

9. AnonymousJune 16,2025 at 3:03PM UTC

   How old is she? It may be that she doesn't understand the importance of being proactive and self-motivated in the workplace. Is this her first job? I would have a career conversation with her. Explain to her that there are many paths to success, and they all start with being present, contributing to the team, and carving your way. She also might need to hear that people are noticing when she is doing very little and scrolling on her phone.

10. Amanda Gunn-InfanteJune 16,2025 at 3:34PM UTC

    I find these responses so interesting. I’m an admin, so let me ask about her workload, as I’m often being loaded with work from various sources. My response is very similar to hers(depending on priority), I’ll add it to my list but I can’t guarantee I’ll get to it today or something similar.

    That said, based on what you’re saying… Stop doing the work for her. It’s the way to fix the problem. If tasks are still getting done, your lazy boss will never acknowledge the problem because there is none at the end of the day. Consider going above your bosses head if necessary. You’ve tried Path A, might be time for Path B. If the cabinet is meant for your exclusive use, reclaim your space. Closed mouths don’t get fed, stand up for yourself. Just keep it professional at all times and save all receipts.

11. AnonymousJune 16,2025 at 4:58PM UTC

    I would stop looking at her. Take ownership of your stuff. Your boss just needs to know you are working it out. It's not personal so watching your coworker and forming opinions about her work style is not helping you. If she is there to support you, setup a meeting (own it) with your boss and coworker.to review the work flow and determine the best way to ask for supportBe proactive and not personal. Judgement and opinions won't really address anything.

12. BarbaraJune 16,2025 at 7:53PM UTC

    Excellent advice! Mind your own business. I always need to remember that!

13. AnonymousJune 16,2025 at 6:18PM UTC

    What does using space in a filing cabinet have to do with her not having enough work to do?

14. AnonymousJune 16,2025 at 9:19PM UTC

    Nothing. It’s not the space, it’s the messaging. There was a project she did not complete and I spoke to her about it, nicely, and left the folder on her her desk and she flipped out and threatened to quit. Believe me, it was not passive aggressive on my part, she just seems to call the shots.

15. AnonymousJune 17,2025 at 12:57AM UTC

    Well if you can prove you need help from an admin, request to hire one. Speak with your boss and let him know that this current person doest have time to support you and you are drowning. The key is you need to be able to prove you need an admin. It can't be a nice to have.

16. AnonymousJune 16,2025 at 7:51PM UTC

    maybe she has been given mixed messages and doesn’t think she is responsible for any work from you or if she is, it is a low priority. If you must give her work, have a conversation and saying that you need it by a certain time. If she says that this is not possible say thank you and do it yourself. It sounds like she feels empowered to not accommodate you. You are also spending way too much time watching her and making judgements about her time and priorities. You’re not her boss and you are needlessly stressing yourself out. When you were told that she was a resource for you , you should have taken the time to find out the parameters. Live and learn. Hopefully you have enough to do to

    take her off your radar. Good luck!

17. AnonymousJune 16,2025 at 11:57PM UTC

    Not sure why...but this admin clearly has a chip on her shoulder and unfortunately, you're the recipient of her resentment. That statement, "if I have time, I'll get to it" is akin to saying that whatever you assign her to do isn't at all going to be priority. You can attempt to do your part to get along and coexist. Maybe she will come around. But be warned, unless she has an attitude adjustment, it's only going to get worse. And should it get worse, then you'll have no other option but to ask for her to be reassigned or released. If you're busy and overwhelmed, the last thing you need is a condescending support not willing to pull their weight. Just my opinion

18. AnonymousJune 17,2025 at 4:53AM UTC

    This is so tough! If you could bring a solution to your boss instead of a problem, maybe that would help. You can create a simple project management system that outlines what projects you are working on, broken down into multiple tasks, and use that to clearly "assign" tasks and show who exactly is doing what. See if the boss would like this approach to keeping everyone equally accountable. Maybe include others you work with on adjacent teams, so it does not seem like it is only about the two of you.

19. AnonymousJune 17,2025 at 5:13PM UTC

    If you meet this person with respect you will get the same. On the other hand, even if the admin is responsible her words are a clear sign they feel disrespected. Or are you one of those workers who demand or are not pleasant with admin staff? I'm playing the advocate here. Especially as I also work within the same situation, but the admin likes me. Those who are demanding or approach in a demanding manner doesn't make her want to help. Though she is responsible for doing what we ask, it's about in the ask, not the demand. Try to approach them gently, asking for help, and raising them up as being important to you. I promise you, if you show how valuable they are to you, they will do more. It works.

20. AnonymousJune 17,2025 at 7:07PM UTC

    As a former admin assistant, are you sure she is supposed to support you? At that job, I was assigned several executives that I directly supported and their staff. The level of support varied, which was defined in the scope of the role. For executives I would book their travel and do their expense reports. For the staff it was more of help, such as sending them the link for the travel portal and the link for the expense report software. If you are a staff person are you expecting the assistant to do things that are beyond the scope of her job?

21. AnonymousJune 17,2025 at 7:33PM UTC

    Accept that you can't count on her for support. You need to do your job without her. If you can't get your work done, that's between you and your boss, and needs to be communicated only if/when something specific didn't happen, not vaugely in advance. Only bring the AA up if your boss specifically points you to her after you have a concrete specific issue that is a problem. That way it will look like the boss delegated that specific item to her, not you. Less than ideal, but it is what it is.

    My boss has an AA that is actually her Emotional Support Human and only does clerical work as a sideline. Once I accepted that everyone started to get along. I only give the AA non-essential clerical tasks with no deadline and then praise them to the boss for completing them. When AA is gone, boss does not do well so the whole team has accepted this dynamic. We just have to be careful not to ever say ESH.

22. AnonymousJuly 13,2025 at 5:57PM UTC

    I would sit down with your manager and understand how he gives her tasks to do. Then sit down with her and work out how you give her tasks aligned with his style, set deadlines. If she is truly not working and not adding any value or feels that perhaps she shouldn't be taking guidance from you that is a power issue. Be firm but kind and let her know why and that the work needs to be done via her support role. If this still does not resolve it bring in HR for their hand holding to fix.

23. AnonymousAugust 17,2025 at 2:14PM UTC

    Are you a woman of color?

24. Rose Perez-RuizOctober 14,2025 at 10:51PM UTC

    start documenting and send the file to your manager and HR.

    we all work with people who are there for a paycheck and will only do the bare minimum.