I've been contacted by a former colleague about a position I've posted on LinkedIn.

25 Comments

1. AnonymousMarch 3,2023 at 7:54AM UTC

   I'd be as honest as you can in a constructive way.

   Is it just this role that he's not a fit for? If so, why would he not be a good fit for this, but would be for other roles at other companies/on other teams.

   Do you think he's just not the strongest candidate? Tell him why another candidate is stronger and perhaps he can level up in that area.

2. AnonymousMarch 3,2023 at 10:19AM UTC

   He's technically very strong, maybe even slightly overqualified. I have no concerns about his ability to do the job. He's still early in his career and very ambitious. I know this because he worked for me for a couple of years. The company is very small and it would just be the two of us for now, the company is growing rapidly though. My main concern is that he will become impatient and want more career growth faster than I can give him. His skills and ambition are much more suited for a large corporation and any company would be lucky to have him. I'm thinking about succession planning also (I'm just 5+ years from retirement) and want someone who will be with me for the long haul to take over when I do retire. My preferred candidate is also very strong technically, is a good cultural fit, and has a record of staying with companies for a long time. She worked for me for 8 yrs previously, so I know her well and have complete faith we'll be a great team once again and will be with me for the duration. If she wasn't interested, he would be my next choice but she's very excited about the opportunity.

3. AnonymousMarch 3,2023 at 1:04PM UTC

   These are all very reasonable concerns and it's as much for his career growth as anything else. All you need to say is that you think he has strong potential and would have the opportunities he needs to progress in his career in a bigger company. It's perfectly valid that you want someone with more extensive experience in a small department - you likely need to cover more varied responsibilities when there's just two of you. You can also let him know if you'd be willing to serve as a reference. I've had candidates I've been willing to help in other ways.

   I'm about to do the same thing myself. I picked an excellent candidate I can see as my successor over another excellent candidate who isn't going to have the space to advance quickly enough to stay. For both candidates I'm not hiring, I already have other opportunities in mind that I'm suggesting to the colleagues in a position to carve out new roles. They all have solid strengths and could add more value to the company in the right roles. I just had to choose the candidate who was the best fit for this particular role.

4. DaniellemcooperMarch 3,2023 at 1:17PM UTC

   I think what you said here is an excellent way to tell him. It shows you think so highly of him that you don’t think he would get the right growth at this company. I would recommend having an actual video or in person meeting about it. Start with telling him everything about him you think is amazing and say “a part of me wants to hire you right now”. And then tell him All the reasons why the job is not a good fit for him and how you feel it would hold him back.

   That will probably be enough. If he still pushes then you can say what you really need in this person that works with you. And tell him you will do everything you can to support him getting a role elsewhere. It would be great if you have a connection you could introduce him to.

5. AnonymousMarch 3,2023 at 1:20PM UTC

   Be cautious when using the word overqualified, it is not an acceptable word in the HR legal community.

6. AnonymousMarch 3,2023 at 3:27PM UTC

   Interesting. I never knew that. I've heard many candidates being referred to as overqualified over the years. What makes it so offensive?

7. Heather BinghamMarch 6,2023 at 1:41PM UTC

   It isn't that we can't judge people to be too qualified for a role - there are always going to be candidates who we know will not be entirely happy if not using all of their experience and skill. It is more the exact term "over qualified" that has become problematic, as it is linked to age discrimination, almost to the point of being a euphemism for "this person is too old". The sentiment is absolutely fine if explained, just not the phrase.

8. Susan Sims-PrittsMarch 8,2023 at 4:10PM UTC

   Interesting. Another version of the phrase we all heard from our parents and preschool teachers: 'Use your words'. LOL

9. Mare LevineMarch 5,2023 at 5:43PM UTC

   Maybe he is not on the same trajectory as you remember? People change--he might have married, or have found with the pandemic he has different priorities now. Perhaps interview him with a clean slate and find out who he is now and if that meets what you are looking for Good luck

10. Susan Sims-PrittsMarch 8,2023 at 4:08PM UTC

    Best, most thoughtful and insightful comment so far, based on my 40 years as a manager who interviewed, hired, trained and fired my own people, with input from our owners and our team. ..... never pass up an opportunity based on your assumptions.

11. AnonymousMarch 3,2023 at 1:18PM UTC

    be as honest as you can, state the skill set the culture, etc. etc. are not the right fit for him and unfortunately there are other candidates that are a stronger fit that will be considered.

12. AnonymousMarch 3,2023 at 2:22PM UTC

    I would handle it like any other candidate. Please wait until the preferred candidate accepts the position, and let him know he was a strong candidate but you chose to go in another direction. Letting your prior acquaintance get in the way of treating him like any other person who applies can have ways of coming back to bite you. Don't overdo any explanation, as that could raise concerns or accusations of bias. If you have any suggestions of other organizations that may be hiring that you feel are a good fit, offer him the potential of being a reference for other opportunities. However, I would not go any further than that with explanations.

13. AnonymousMarch 3,2023 at 3:22PM UTC

    Great advice. Thank you.

14. Kimberley Ferretti HammettMarch 3,2023 at 8:39PM UTC

    It's a tough one and really, there are a lot of good options. Personally, I prefer being able to have the honest, sometimes uncomfortable conversations and find that when done with empathy and clarity, they can strengthen relationships. It seems like you want to continue a professional relationship with this person past this interaction so I would mostly suggest approaching this with the assumption that he does too. If it turns out he ghosts you and doesn't, that's on him, but if you make it too impersonal and guarded, you may close yourselves off to the chance of this being a positive interaction.

    I think you'll have to figure out specifically what the best wording and approach is right for you and his personality, but I'll give you a story of how I navigated a kindof opposite but similar situation in hopes it'll help you with an idea of what is right for you.

    I once had a Director who I worked with but not directly for. We worked really well together and she was impressed by some of my skills so she started to joke that she wanted to steal me from my boss. When she had an opening around the same time shifts were happening with my boss she notified me of the opening and later asked if I planned to apply. Even though the role was technically considered a step up title and pay-wise, I would have moved from working with the global team to just one, small focus and repeating the same routine every month with less creativity than I was afforded in my role at the time. I met with her and told her I had seriously considered it because I loved working with her but I knew myself and could see me getting bored and frustrated in that role and not performing in the way that made her like me in the first place. I told her I respected her too much to take a role on her team that I wasn't aligned with just for the pay raise but I did also describe the type of role I was hoping would be my next step and to please let me know when she could get that position approved ;). Thankfully she fully understood and, actually, we soon after were both laid off but have remained in touch nearly 5 years since we last worked together. Once, when we met for lunch she admitted it was smart of me not to take that role because I would have gotten stuck and she would have felt bad for pushing me into it.

    I hope whatever you decide, discussion goes well and you both continue to benefit from a professional relationship.

15. AnonymousMarch 3,2023 at 11:50PM UTC

    overqualified implies too many years of experience which equates to mature, ageism etc. etc.

16. AnonymousMarch 4,2023 at 2:44PM UTC

    Thanks. Understood. He almost half my age so that should not be an issue. He's just capable of working much more complex tasks than the job requires.

17. Rebecca MillikenMarch 6,2023 at 6:18PM UTC

    Perhaps but maybe he wants the job.

18. Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition SpecialistMarch 4,2023 at 12:46AM UTC

    It is much hard when it's someone you know personally. Releasing people is the least favorite part of my job so I feel you on this.

    You say you don't feel he's the right fit and that you're learning toward another candidate that worked for you previously.

    Are you uninterested in Candidate number one no matter what? What if you interview Candidate number two and they either turn out to not be the fit you thought or are not interested in the position/company or y'all can't come to an agreement on compensation? Would Number One be back in the mix?

    If so, I would not tell him anything yet. If he wouldn't be in the mix no matter what, you're just going to have to tell him you don't feel he's the right fit for the position. Be conscious of the reason you give, if any - that it doesn't leave you open to any liability.

    If you think he could be an asset to the company in a different role, encourage him to keep checking the company job portal and to set up alerts so new positions are pushed out to him.

19. Crystal HowellMarch 4,2023 at 11:19AM UTC

    It's business, if he applied handle it with Thank you we decided to move forward with another candidate.

20. BarbaraMarch 5,2023 at 1:54PM UTC

    I would interview both candidates and then make a decision, to be fair.

21. Heather BinghamMarch 6,2023 at 1:43PM UTC

    I agree entirely. Firstly, the person they are now may not match up with your recollection, so you're missing out on additional information if you don't interview both. Secondly, you'll find it easier to turn down the person if you have interviewed, because you can hang the turn-down on their answers, not your previous knowledge. We tend to worry that if we see people in person, it will be harder to reject one of them, but if you ask the right questions in the interview, it will actually make your job easier and you will potentially leave an even better impression with the person to whom you do not give the job.

22. AnonymousMarch 6,2023 at 2:49PM UTC

    I can see that you have a lot of empathy and care about delivering the news in a considerate way, without downplaying his skills and experience. You have received helpful feedback below. Remember that it's essential to approach this situation objectively, and not let your emotions get the best of you. Ultimately, while it sounds like the decision is yours to make, it's worth bearing in mind that others have also play a role in the hiring process. I wish you the best of luck.

23. AnonymousMarch 6,2023 at 3:47PM UTC

    Put both candidates through the process and re-group with the interview team to get feedback from the team he will be joining. You just might be pleasantly surprised and end up hiring him. If you don’t , easier to give the feedback since you gave him the opportunity to interview for the role. I would tell him that several candidates are in the process so he doesn’t think this is a slam dunk.

24. Focused721350March 6,2023 at 4:32PM UTC

    Good Morning,

    Straight up! Don't anytime of his or yours. It's better to be honest, Than! Keeping someone hanging.

    Good Luck and God Bless, Ms. T ;)

25. AnonymousMarch 6,2023 at 7:10PM UTC

    The truth is the best path. I would give him feedback on your options for whom to hire and let him know that while you value staying in touch that the person whom you have identified is stronger in XYZ than he is and that is why the decision went the other way.