I am so discouraged.

I am so discouraged. I am in a very bad work environment and I feel like I just need to get out. I am considering a role that pays quite a bit less than what I'm making just to get out of this position. I'm in my fifties and I had several interviews but when all was said and done I was not selected. I am beginning to feel desperate. I I'm tired from all of the rejections. I have an interview tomorrow and I don't want to screw it up and show my discouragement. I guess I'm just looking for a little bit of encouragement. Being in the negative environment day in and day out is really wearing on me.

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31 Comments

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  1. Anonymous

    The more you can focus on gratitude and your personal life I've found the better. Meditation also works to shift your focus and provide an emotional respite.

    If you can shift your focus, I'm certain you will feel better. Remember you are talented and a great hire that a company will be glad to have aboard. Good luck!

  2. Anonymous

    You're right about gratitude. Thank you for your encouragement.

  3. Anonymous

    You are seasoned, like me, you are worthy, like us all, and the right job and fit will appear. Share your enthusiasm and you will receive what you put out there. Now go out there and shine and get that job. You can do it!

  4. Kristy Garland

    I understand completely. I got my previous job in my 50's, and I'm about to get another one. Just because employers can't see your worth, doesn't mean that you are worthless.

    If you believe you won't get another job, you won't. If you think you will find a job, you will. Please remember that your mindset becomes your reality. You got this!

  5. Anonymous

    Thank you, you are right. Tonight as I was preparing for tomorrow's interview I had written down all of the reasons why I am a good candidate and I realized, I'm great! Just writing down all of my good qualities and experience and summarizing how I can benefit the company made me see my worth. My current manager is very self-absorbed and once everyone beneath her to think she's the only one who's valuable and that attitude rubs off on me indirectly. I definitely need to get out of here.

  6. Anonymous

    I needed to read this tonight. You are right! I feel like my manager in particular really tries hard to suppress me and in doing so justify treating me like I'm not worth anything. This kind of person is dangerous because if a person stays too long under this kind of manager they might start believing it. It is the manager's insecurity driving her management style and she has no desire to build a strong team but instead to appear like she's the only one who knows anything. I can't get out fast enough.

  7. Kryssy Santana

    That was my past assistant clinical director she did not have the experience to be a clinical director and I had more relevant experience and she knew it.

  8. Lnmaiorana

    I really hope you do well! A current toxic environment can bring your mental state down but you have to dig deeper and fight for your sanity and your life. You have to pay bills and make a living so keep fighting and show up as your best self! You got this!

  9. Anonymous

    Thank you!!

  10. Anonymous

    Thinking positive thoughts for you. It is disheartening and that wears on you so much. Just know that we are all sending love and support. Wishing you the very best!!!

  11. Anonymous

    I hope your interview today goes well! I know how it can weigh on you when you're feeling trapped in a bad situation. Keep your head up -- There's something out there!

    And, for what it's worth -- I've accepted the lower offer for my sanity's sake before, and it worked out fine. Sometimes it's worth it.

  12. Anonymous

    Good luck with your interview! Before the interview get yourself a treat, or if that makes you too nervous promise yourself a treat after. Something to look forward to will get you into a good positive mindset.

    I usually get myself a milkshake after interviews or a slurpee, because they make me happy.

    Make sure that in general you are taking care of yourself. Interviewing and job hunting is exhausting and you have to have something else in your life that is bringing you joy. This could be something as simple as setting aside time to read a book, or cook a new dish, going for a walk, whatever it is that you enjoy doing make sure you're actually doing it. It will help you stay centered and add a splash of positivity into your life.

    Good luck you've got this! :)

  13. Kryssy Santana

    The feeling of discouragement after interviews that do not yield positive results can be quite disheartening. I can empathize with that experience. I hold a master's degree, and at the moment, I am finding it challenging to secure even a part-time retail position. It can be difficult to mask frustration during interviews, and I understand that completely.

    I have made it a point during interviews to remember that I also have the opportunity to assess the organization and determine whether it would be a suitable fit for me. I have particularly focused on evaluating the company culture whenever possible during the interview process. If I don't receive an offer, reflecting on my impressions and any concerns I had helps me understand that perhaps it wasn’t meant to be. It is important to prioritize my own needs, which is a perspective that many, especially women, are not often encouraged to embrace. We tend to feel pressured to adapt ourselves to fit the role, but it's crucial to recognize that sometimes, even jobs within our field may not be the right match.

    It can be a tough journey, but it is essential to stay positive. There will be opportunities that align with your values and skills. I encourage you to explore different avenues and consider pursuits that invigorate you before the demands of a new job consume all your time. Personally, I have returned to activities like reading and swimming at my community pool, which are not only affordable but also help alleviate negative thoughts.

    I hope you find this perspective helpful. I remind myself not to adopt a desperate mindset, as doing so has led me to overlook red flags in the past and resulted in negative work experiences. It is vital to take pride in your skills and experiences, allowing them to speak for themselves during interviews. The right organization will recognize and value your abilities, while the wrong ones may make you feel uncomfortable from the onset.

    Pay attention to how interviewers perceive you and their reactions throughout the process. If you sense hesitation, it may be a sign that the opportunity is not the right fit. Ultimately, your experience matters, and it is important not to settle for positions that do not recognize your worth. Remember, interviews are not just about whether you are chosen; they are also an opportunity for you to determine if the organization is one you want to select for your career.

  14. Kryssy Santana

    Completely, dont le the small minded people win. YOu can spot them with your experience probably faster tham myself, i have more experience but I still feel it's not enough because people will throw curveballs, but usually in interviews, if I get the sense the person is unprofessional, nitpicky not really paying attention to my answers or trying to rush me into a decision, thats how I know it's not a good fit, interviewers will show you who they are, if you are paying attentiong and don't let insecurity cloud your judgememnt, some toxic bosses thrive on that and if they spot that in you during the interview they will try to hire you to make your life miserable. You deserve better.

  15. Kryssy Santana

    nothing matters more than your feelings of safety, trust and stability at work. Without that you will face burnout and it won't be pretty . Trust your instincts they are stronger than you know.

  16. Anonymous

    You could consider going on LOA for your stress with a doctor's note. Then continue to look for a new job while you're out. Also focus on getting daily exercise and walks along with cleaner nutrition and good rest/sleep to decrease your stress/anxiety.

    I went this route 5 years ago for the same reason.... hated the job I was feeling stuck in, and my stress was overwhelming. Take care of yourself!

  17. Anonymous

    Go into the interview well-prepared with a notebook and questions you want to ask. My worst regret in any interview was the question(s) I forgot while in the interview but remembered on my way home. Good luck!!

  18. Anonymous

    Your peace is worth everything. -Words from my Dad

  19. Anonymous

    Tell your Dad Thank you from all

    of us. ?

  20. Anonymous

    Love this post.

  21. Anonymous

    How did the interview go?

  22. Anonymous

    I felt good about the interview and am hopeful. The pay is less but the job looks great and I can make it on that salary. I enjoyed talking with the interviewer and I sensed that she liked me but I also should assume there is a lot of competition. I will find out within the next two weeks. I so appreciate everyone's encouraging responses.

  23. Anonymous

    Pretty good. These days just getting a call back is a miracle. Got an offer after the first round so I'm now waiting for HR to finish background checks, etc. The pay is a little less but its doable. Start date next week. Thanks for the motivation. This layoff situation was a tough one.

  24. Kimberly Johnson

    Awesome!

  25. Anonymous

    Thank you!!

  26. Anonymous

    Hang in there! I was recently laid off from a very toxic job. After several interviews and a LOT of rejection I landed somewhere with a great atmosphere. My peers are similar in age which during the interview process I took as a sign experience was valued here.

  27. Anonymous

    I am in the same boat! So are many others in our age group. Taking less pay for a better environment has been well worth it! Hope the interview went well!

  28. Anonymous

    I am not in this age group. I don't fully understand. I apologise for insensitivity. However it is a tough job market. You have people there who do. Is there any experience you can add outside of your professional role, that you can leverage for your work? So there's two way you can look at this one from training and one from skills.

  29. Anonymous

    yikes those those of bosses do that on purpose I dont want to sound harsh but it doesn't sound like this person wants to help you grow

  30. Kryssy Santana

    Aww Im glad I could help support you, I know how hard and nerve wracking interviews can be and how easy it can be to want to just get the job , but that mindset ,I realized for myself, usually makes me overlook res flags, which back fired on me, and I'm sure others do it too it makes it hard to think clear or really see what's happening and stay present, I guess because there is a lot at stake right you have to make a living, so I'm really glad that it sounded fruitful and productive and I hope you get it yay that's something to celebrate. yes the older I've gotten the more I trust my instincts during my career and usually when I trust my instincts things work out better I can usually navigate my way through interviews or bad coworkers but a toxic environment is not something it's hard to it's hard to navigate that successfully so I'm glad again that your interview went well

  31. Anonymous

    Congratulations on getting the position! If it helps, my friend accepted a position that was 10k less so that she could leave an awful job. Within a couple of years she had received bonuses and raises that resulted in her matching what she had been making at her previous job. I'm crossing my fingers that this happens for you too.

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