What're you unlearning right now?

36 Comments

1. AnonymousApril 16,2025 at 5:15PM UTC

   Good one!

2. AnonymousApril 16,2025 at 5:26PM UTC

   I'm unlearning that I need to show up for myself more. I too have struggled with being a people pleaser and putting other needs before my own. I'm learning to establish better boundaries between my needs and others; not taking on other problems/becoming too emotionally invested when it's not my problem to solve.

3. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 9:13AM UTC

   Some people take it as unsolicited advice. It's probably best not to get too involved.

4. Tina MorenoApril 16,2025 at 9:38PM UTC

   I think I’m unlearning the idea that I have to carry everything alone. For so long, being self-sufficient was my default—my safety net—but now I’m making space to receive without guilt. Whether it’s care, service, love, or genuine support, I’m realizing I don’t have to explain or earn it.

   I’m also unlearning the habit of people-pleasing or over-functioning in spaces where my needs weren’t actually being prioritized. I’m learning to hold my standards, to let silence speak when it needs to, and to walk away when something doesn’t align—instead of shrinking myself to make it work. It’s uncomfortable at times, but it’s also freeing

5. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 9:12AM UTC

   You benefitted by being liberated by the constraints and constructs that you had from old beliefs and roles.

6. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 12:24AM UTC

   I’m unlearning the idea that I’m a slave to toxic environments~ there are resources. I got shortlisted and currently in 2nd place for the award that is pulling from every line of business in my company. I work for a huge tech company.I was shortlisted for speaking up and per the statement that was written, others have come forward, saying they felt relieved because they feel a certain way, but were afraid to say it. How cool is that? I’m learning to lose fear because fear is what keeps you bound. I feel that as long as you’re professional and you have a violent point about anything that is OK to express that and it is also OK, if needed to go above someone’s head. I have learned to teach others how to treat you, but it must start in the beginning.

7. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 9:07AM UTC

   What is the advantage of unlearning?

8. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 9:08AM UTC

   Or benefit of unlearning?

9. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 9:10AM UTC

   Unlearning perfectionism.

10. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 1:54PM UTC

    It helps you to eliminate bias and bad habits from your regular routine.

11. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 12:22PM UTC

    Growth

12. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 4:50PM UTC

    Showing a growth mindset, showing curiosity. Changing up how you thought about something to a new way. Changing a habit that no longer serves.

13. Paulla Fetzek, MSEdApril 17,2025 at 1:14PM UTC

    Hi Yamini!

    I'm unlearning that I the world won't come to an end if I don't have a project totally to my perfection standards. My idea of good can be ridiculously skewed compared to what my boss and others consider good. I need to trust in their evaluation - and move on!

14. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 1:46PM UTC

    I am unlearning my need to "fix" everything. Even things that are out of my control, I want to help and fix. I either try to fix it or I accept responsibility for it when I had absolutely nothing to do with it. I just hate/despise/loathe finger pointers. We obviously know something happened and someone is responsible. However at this moment we are trying to figure out exactly what happened and how to prevent it from happening again.

15. Katie SuttonApril 17,2025 at 2:56PM UTC

    I am unlearning that I do not have to work off hours to be a good employee

16. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 3:16PM UTC

    I'm unlearning padding emails with excessive 'nice' small talk. Especially - the more senior the person you are dealing with, it actually ISN'T 'nice' or thoughtful to do - they don't have time for that. Get to the point!

    I recognize that as a woman - and a woman of color - my thus being more 'business-like' and pragmatic might not be received the same way as if it came from certain others. But that is a them problem.

17. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 4:24PM UTC

    Letting go of ‘expert mode’ and leaning into questions, connection, and new perspectives. After 24 years in an industry it's easy to slip into that SME mode. I am still learning and picking up new skills, and leaning more into curiosity.

18. AnonymousApril 17,2025 at 10:30PM UTC

    Unlearned the need to always be right. I now have the ability to admit when I am wrong, and able to listen and appreciate others' point of view. This has allowed me to be more productive and able to embrace others' giftedness in the workplace. There's not just one way to do things. I'm SO much happier in my career and in my life!

19. AnonymousApril 19,2025 at 1:15PM UTC

    Good for you! I wish that my director could unlearn that she is always right and that the right way of doing things is her way.

20. Juhi ShahiApril 18,2025 at 3:26AM UTC

    Unlearning that I don't always have to be "available" when work needs me. I have a personal life and I need to prioritise it too.

21. Marla FieldsApril 18,2025 at 2:26PM UTC

    I'm unlearning what success is. I have spent so many years determining success by society's standards and goals but not by what I want and need. Working on focusing on what I want instead of what society tells me I should want...questioning my path forward and where forward truly is.

22. Molly MillerApril 19,2025 at 12:54PM UTC

    I am unlearning that “professional development” is not the same as “career advancement.” In my company, discussion on PD is always about developing leadership skills, to prepare in case there is an opening at a higher level. I have zero interest in managing people, instead, I have been focusing on improving my analytics skills, which while not required, is making me significantly more efficient, and spills over into assisting others on my team. I am much happier, my boss is happy, and I don’t have to keep having those dreaded conversations about “growing in the company.”

23. SaraApril 19,2025 at 2:40PM UTC

    I'm unlearning being apologetic for existing or needing things. As women we are conditioned to ask for what we need sweetly with sugar. In the office this can come across as weak: "Can you please..." "If you have a moment..." "When you're not too busy...". Instead I'm working on saying "Send the missing information please" or "Hi I have a question" or "I scheduled us some time when your calendar says you're free". I think people see me as more competent and I am given a lot more respect I and certainly feel more confident. I'm trying to share this with younger women at work, I definitely see them being meak and apologetic in asking for what they need.

24. AnonymousApril 19,2025 at 4:51PM UTC

    I am unlearning not to be afraid if things don't go perfectly or as planned. It's ok if I haven't responded to that email within 24 hours.

25. AnonymousApril 20,2025 at 12:17PM UTC

    I am unlearning that sometimes your manager or colleagues cannot be trusted and to stay true to yourself

26. AnonymousApril 21,2025 at 6:26AM UTC

    How to stop venting. Well I consulted Ai.

    It suggested putting up a boundary in such situations.

27. AnonymousApril 21,2025 at 6:27AM UTC

    Yes an anonymised boundary.

28. AnonymousApril 21,2025 at 7:17AM UTC

    If I didn't have productivity in my life, I wouldn't have a lot. The alternative of just giving up on productivity. It left me empty inside. It is sad. That one lives through their work. It makes me happy. Whilst I was living a life. One could be busy and not productive. A busy body is not my thing.

    Well it's about achievement.. or value orientated output, and an ending of it..

29. AnonymousApril 21,2025 at 7:18AM UTC

    If an intermediate senior is bringing out the worst in me. I wouldn't happy in the relationship dynamics.

30. AnonymousApril 21,2025 at 5:00PM UTC

    Gosh, yes. Helping everyone as your first priority only to turn around and realize that you've become a support player entirely and haven't had time to shine a light on your own star!

31. AnonymousApril 22,2025 at 4:19AM UTC

    I am unlearning that it’s best to value myself. Go find a role that really challenges me and then I enjoy going to work rather thanstaying at a job for for too long when I knew I was undervalued and not utilized in the right way. Change is always hard, but I should’ve applied for new jobs sooner

32. Kelly MeigsApril 22,2025 at 12:38PM UTC

    One of the hardest things to unlearn is that you don't have to do everything yourself and to allow others to learn and grow by having work delegated to them. If you're a perfectionist, that's hard because nobody will do it as well as you. But perfect can and is the enemy of done and some things just don't need your attention. And focusing on all those things you should be delegating is keeping you from fulfilling your purpose. Still working on learning this lesson!

33. AnonymousApril 22,2025 at 6:42PM UTC

    100 % agree with this statement. One of the hardest things for me then and now is delegation. As my role morphs and grows, I need to let go of the tasks I take on today. It is not that my team is not capable, it is taking the time to train and delegate the tasks that is tough at times in between our day to day workload.

34. Kelly MeigsApril 24,2025 at 12:28AM UTC

    I thought of another thing: I read Simon Sinek's Infinite Game. I am trying to structure my efforts around building for the future, not focusing on putting out fires all the time. Gotta allow space for planning and thinking and pondering on what my team needs down the line, not just right now.

35. Kimberly BonkApril 22,2025 at 2:26PM UTC

    One of the hardest things to learn is that your value is not tied to how others communicate with you. This includes searching for a job, communicating at your current role, etc. I've had to tell myself many times that I know I am very capable and that I have a lot to offer a company.

36. JoAnn MooreApril 23,2025 at 5:21PM UTC

    Hello Yamini,

    Is it Unlearning or Evolving? I believe we rot when we remain the same. It's in the evolution, growth and changes in our lives that give us a more clear meaning and willing to experience things outside our comfort zone. As the seasons have cycles, so should we. Continuing to explore, imagine and grow everyday is important. I've been running my own business for almost 30 years. Thank God I've learned to respect myself and only work with those who also respect me, my knowledge, experience and my worth. It's exciting to drop the fences that hold us back as we become encouraged of the possibilities that come with change, self growth, and continued learning. Best wishes!