I am about to embark on a new career outside of what I have done for, well basically, my entire professional life.

9 Comments

1. AnonymousAugust 6,2022 at 9:17PM UTC

   I've worked for crappy managers, male and female. I've also had some great managers of both genders.

   My current supervisor is amazing, but I heard some concerning things about her before I met her for the first time. She's very direct, and someone who didn't do well with that approach could find her offensive. I love knowing exactly what's going on and where our expectations aren't aligning.

   I've only had one other supervisor (also female) who proactively took care of their staff like she does - initiating raises and promotions, supporting professional development in general, and being flexible when life happens.

   Hopefully you'll have an awesome manager, but everyone is so individual that it's impossible to know ahead of time how best to approach or work with them.

2. AnonymousAugust 6,2022 at 11:55PM UTC

   Yeah, I'm not sure if there are legit gender differences or not, both the jobs I had under male managers were high volume jobs. I appreciated the directness of the males and how focused they were on just getting the job done. Working for women was tricky. There's been a lot of indirect communication and what I call game playing. I've wanted to scream get to the point already and tell me what you want instead of making me guess and then acting all siddity when I don't read your mind. But each boss is different. Hopefully you will have early conversations about expectations.

3. Alexis GladstoneAugust 7,2022 at 12:58PM UTC

   I've had good and bad male and female managers in my career so I can't say there is a difference. What there is a difference in, and gender has very little to do with it, is communication and leadership style. With that premise, here is what I would do with any new manager I don't know.

   Schedule a meeting to get to know them. Ask questions about them, their expectations, and how they like to communicate. Do your best to follow their lead.

   Check in with them often in the first few months to see if you are on track. I find that starting out with open, honest, communication can do a lot to set up a good relationship even if your styles are different.

   Something to think about. Sometimes female managers might seem "bitchy" because they feel they have more to prove than their male counterparts. They adopt a style that is perfectly acceptable in men but not women. If you can become one of the supporters and work hard to build a partnership with them, it can go a long way in helping both of your careers.

4. AnonymousAugust 7,2022 at 2:23PM UTC

   You can't really know what to expect interpersonally. Play it safe until you know people well, and even then, keep your boundaries.

5. AnonymousAugust 7,2022 at 4:39PM UTC

   Well the itchiness could be masked insecurities and it can stem from a whole host of things. For ex not being taken seriously, being disrespected, being overlooked even though they are in leadership. Or sometimes folks have tested their authority and they had to respond as needed to show dominance and command the respect a man would automatically be given just for being a male. My advice is spend time observing this boss and the dynamics of the atmosphere. Try to guage her preferences to get along and build a rapport with her, like you should for any other boss.

6. AnonymousAugust 8,2022 at 3:22PM UTC

   Totally agree with insecurities, also I tend to overthink things into a paralysis. I have given up leading and my personal preference is to have a hetero male boss. I'm sure there are exceptions but I've had over 30 years in the "professional" workplace.

   Suggestion is to keep her informed, ask for advice. If she responds well, then do more of that. If she get &itchy, then pivot. Good luck!

7. AnonymousAugust 8,2022 at 4:18PM UTC

   Sorry, but there’s no tolerance using such language for female managers.
   If a man behaved this way, would you be calling him ambitious? Assertive? Giving Toughlove? I don’t know, but it is the 21st-century. Try using better vocabulary and say you’re really facing uncertainty, need to overlook this gender bias. How are you dealing with DEI initiatives? Change is good, though sometimes harder on some of us. Best wishes in your new endeavor! It will be fine; keep an open mind!

8. StephanieAugust 8,2022 at 6:31PM UTC

   Oh, you may wish that but there is. I have been a female manager most of my life If the shoe fits, I wear it. If a male manager acted the way I am mentioning, I would call him “bitchy”

   as well. I don’t care what the pronoun is, it’s about acting a certain way and being perceived a certain way. How are you dealing with DEI initiatives?

9. JJAugust 8,2022 at 10:32PM UTC

   You’re starting a toxic environment before you even begin. Yes there are women who are difficult to work with but surprise, so are many men. Commitment to fair and honest work practices for yourself will improve your environment, then, should you hit rough waters with an individual team member, you can rely on your maturity, business acumen and clear communications skills to navigate.