Need advice with team members being resistant

18 Comments

1. AnonymousApril 30,2022 at 2:30AM UTC

   Start attaching consequences to this bad behavior. The tail is wagging the dog in this case so you’ll need to jump in and set some boundaries instead of getting steamrolled by these subordinates.

2. AnonymousApril 30,2022 at 2:56PM UTC

   I think part of it is I don't know what I can do.
   My manager is in a red state which I think is less sympathetic to employees and I'm in a blue one which definitely sides with employees, so his input may not translate to my state. I've asked the local office administrator what consequences I can mette out, but she didn't tell me and instead wants to lay down the law (which she knows and I don't). The frustrating thing is that then she'll say she had to do this rather than telling me what my options are so I could handle it myself. I guess on the pluss side, all will be handled by eob Monday.

3. AnonymousMay 1,2022 at 12:11PM UTC

   What does political affiliation have to do with HR policies…are they conditional based on being Republican or Democrat? This is a hardcore HR question steeped in your orgs policy. If you can’t execute on your own, engage HR immediately, start documenting and take action. You’re being treated as a doormat because you’re perceived as an ineffective leader.

4. Barb HansenApril 30,2022 at 3:48AM UTC

   Have you asked your team why they think their pre-move work can wait? Have you asked your team what you are "not getting?"

   I would schedule a meeting with your team, share with them the move schedule (if you haven't already), explain to them the expectations set by the Office Admin and ask them how this team can support the wider company's needs. Waiting until some time in the future to get started isn't going to work because of the knock-on effect on other teams.

   A meeting is worth a try (if you haven't already) to see if you can engage your team in the solution.

5. AnonymousApril 30,2022 at 3:02PM UTC

   I actually did ask them this morning before I read your emtry; the guy who I suspect is leading the charge will be in the office today so to me he has no excuse not to answer questions.
   I'm dying to know what kind of business reason would justify the amount of resistance they have given me. I suspect they have no business reason but just want to try to wag the dog as the other poster commented. Maybe we need to get here to get to the "Come to Jesus" conversation where they need to either get in line with the company's needs or get out. So maybe it's a blessing in disguise.

6. AnonymousMay 1,2022 at 3:13AM UTC

   I get the impression that the manager before me tried to get out of their way because they are capable, but she also thought that they were a "spoiled" group (she told me this so I know this). She wanted me to start having them come in to the office right when Delta started, so needless to say, that didn't happen. They are considered essential - the equipment they use is in the office, and while they leaned on other departments before now they have to step up; and they aren't.

   I did ask the senior person why he thinks things can wait, and what he said is what they have said for a while: he thinks the OA is overreacting; things can wait, it's not necessary. Everything can be done quickly. This is the same refrain I've heard over and over. So I think that's it. They want to wait until the last minute. They think they know better. They don't want to match the pace of the other groups and they think they can handle the unexpected issues that come up with a move.

7. Joanne RosenApril 30,2022 at 7:22PM UTC

   Yelling at them? Ouch!

   "Hey, team. The Blah department seems to think we aren't capable of getting this done. I told them that we are an amazing team. So, is there any reason why you can't get XYZ done by Friday? Then I can show them that, not only CAN we get it done, we get it done quickly!"

   You get more flies with honey than with vinegar.

8. AnonymousApril 30,2022 at 9:21PM UTC

   1) Never fall for the trap of yelling at a subordinate.
   Only certain groups of people successfully get away with that....habitually. And if you are not a part of that club, the blowback can be severe. I'm giving your boss sid-eye for that one. I smell set up.

   2) Since you are new manager to that environment it looks like you have to spend time building a positive working relationship with them and earning their trust. I know what you think, its not fair. They should respect me as their manager. But unfortunately, in order to get past this, you have to be strategic. Offer to have lunch with them to learn their personalities and work styles. Develop and participate in team building exercises to foster better relationships with them.

   3) Do some background digging to find out their habits. Get data on how their performance has been in the past and their workstyle. Everyone is different. Some people are capable of getting their work done in a short period of time, others not so much. Does their performance history in the past (before you got there) demonstrate that they do not meet deadlines? If not, try to give them the benefit of the doubt. You have to consider how they perceive you and currently, they are likely labelling you to be controlling and difficult. (Which of course you are not, but try your best to not give them any excuse or any reason to do that or use that against you).

   4) Every time you meet with each person and set deadlines, make sure it is fully documented, i.e. date and time of discussion and elements discussed. Tell them both verbally, and more importantly via email to create a trail. (So no one can lie and say you never told them so). Make sure their responses are documented. If they are dumb enough to respond aversely/combatively via email even better to establish a pattern of behaviour. If the jobs are unionized, by the 3rd attempt, have a union member there as a witness to show that this is a repeated situation.

   5) Weigh out the consequences if they are late. Keep in mind that as a new manager with employees who have been there for several years, they are likely not going anywhere, reluctant to change a process ingrained in their everyday and it is you that has to adjust to them to figure out a way to make it work (even if it is not fair). If the consequences are low risk, sometimes you should let the person's faults play out so it can be further documented, and to further prove your point. You will be justified to address it during performance reviews. Check your written HR policy on consequences and disciplinary actions you can exercise for when employees do not complete a task as instructed by their manager.

   6) *The most important question is when you talk to your manager about these instances, what does your gut tell you? Do they sound like they have your support? Are they giving you constructive feedback? Since it is all 3 employees, have you considered having a meeting to address the issue with your manager present. Sometimes employees need to visibly see that your manager has your back before they start showing some respect. So guage your manager and act accordingly.

   7) If your gut tells you that your manager does not genuinely support you, see if there is another peer manager at an equivalent level (either your level or above who has similar duties/experiences) you feel you can talk to and see if they can offer any advice or guidance.

   8) Hang in their and congratulations on your leadership position. Once you can earn and build trust with your team, everything else gets easier, I promise. So focus on this for now. When you make a request your subordinate is averse to, weigh the risk. If the risk is low, let it go, give them the latitude to f**ck up so you can bring a factual event to their attention that they cannot dismiss or ignore.

9. AnonymousMay 1,2022 at 3:29AM UTC

   Thank you for your advice. I realize that I do need to establish trust. I was lucky enough to be trained by the former manager and she said she had a moment when they were resistant to her as well, but she had also worked there for like 30 years and knew the ins and outs.

   I don't even know the disciplinary process; I don't know what kind of leverage I have. We are going to have "come to Jesus" conversation on Monday with the Office Administrator, the local boss. So she supports me...but she will also say that she had to help me and that is to my detriment. I have asked her to tell me what disciplinary policy is but she is as or more frustrated with my team than I am so I think she wants to get her proverbial punches in.

   I have a degree of support, but I also feel like it is a stain on my leadership. But again, still not sure what my options are. I have been discussing with all three of them.

   I try to let some things go, but I think we are now at the point where their sense of entitlement (to work from home rather than RTO) is coming at a head; especially since they are necessary for this office move. Maybe it's a blessing in disguise that we can help them understand that they need to be a part of the larger company picture and not with their personal picture as they were for a couple of years.

   Lol, it will be interesting after that conversation on Monday just how cohesive they will feel with me after that. I don't think they will feel terribly cohesive. I have made inroads to have more of a relationship with them by having regular meetings and picking up the phone to talk with them rather than messaging them. But we'll see.

   Thank you for your response - I appreciate your insight!

10. AnonymousMay 4,2022 at 7:46PM UTC

    You are definitely on the right track. Keep focusing on leading with positivity (as frustrating as it seems). The old adage "kill em with kindness" is annoying but with persistence, can break down any wall. Good Luck, we are all routing for you. Continue to incorporate this situation in your prayers. Sometimes, the good Lord has to send an Archangel or two to get folks together. It will work out. Hang in there!

11. AnonymousMay 1,2022 at 7:06PM UTC

    Are you familiar with critical path methodology? If you can enlist them to estimate the time it takes to do specific tasks and put them in order on a timeline (I use a spreadsheet), they will have more buy-in and you can settle down your anxious OA.

12. Stephanie DudleyMay 10,2022 at 3:46PM UTC

    I was thinking about critical path as well; I'm a PM. But I realize that this isn't a logic issue. It's an emotional issue.

    I wound up going to their office, talking with each one of them, and I'm micromanaging a bit. But I have to since there is the remote component. I think they are finally getting it, but it's been rough going.

13. BethBMay 2,2022 at 1:00PM UTC

    You are a manger. That means you need to manage through good and bad. It doesn’t mean you need to yell at anyone ever. It means being straight and not beating around the bush.

    Why not some honesty? We may think we can do this later and it

    could even be true. We only know our own piece of the puzzle and there could be other aspects of the move that depend on the schedule we were given. The group coordinating the move wants this done by ——-. We are all on the same team and need to get this done. I expect it will be done. We are not going to be the

    group that doesn’t cooperate and gets in the way. Does everyone understand? You may think you knoe better and could be right. It doesn’t matter. This isn’t a democracy. and if we were coordinating a

    company-wide project, we wouldn’t appreciate another team giving us a hard time and we are

    glknf to show the same courtesy to this team.

    Direct. No nonsense. No threats. No raising the voice.

14. AnonymousMay 2,2022 at 2:34PM UTC

    I think that when they say 'you're not getting it', is that they think they have the power to do what they want as a group and you don't have power over them even though you are the manager. Even though you say you 'do not know' what you can do, I think you need to make a decision to show them that you do have the power to control this situation and decide what the consequences will be rather than allow the OA to handle it for you. You need to assert the authority of your position.

15. Valerie RiegerMay 2,2022 at 6:12PM UTC

    What was your relationship with your team prior to the move preparation? Have they been resistant before now? Consider sitting down with them individually and talk about their resistance to doing what you've asked them to do. Listen to their concerns but make sure that they know that, at the end of the day, they need to do what you ask and that going forward there may be consequences for their behaviors.

16. AnonymousMay 2,2022 at 7:34PM UTC

    I highly recommend Crucial Accountability. Set the expectation and give a firm, clear deadline for tasks that need to be completed. If those deadlines are not met, meet with each team member to discuss the missed expectation, restate your expectation and a clear deadline of when the task must be completed, and the consequence for not meeting that deadline.

    In your conversation, determine if it is a motivation or ability issue that keeps them from completing their tasks on time and develop a game plan together to remove any obstacles (ability) or address the root cause of their frustrations (motivation).

    They need to understand that their actions are impacting the entire company's ability to successfully, and smoothly, transition to a new office. Help them understand the bigger picture and then document, document, document.

    You are not powerless and from the sounds of it, your new company will have your back if your team members need to progress down the disciplinary path. Good luck and you've got this!

17. Liz MilneMay 3,2022 at 4:09AM UTC

    Write a timetable for the move, detailing which team member needs to do what and by when. Make sure they all acknowledge receipt of that timetable, have a copy on view in the office, so no excuses, and then be incredibly strict when the first one doesn't comply. Like, write-ups, written warnings, whatever it takes. My guess is they're taking the p, but refusing a direct and recorded instruction from their manager is pretty hard to dodge...

18. Deb HornerMay 3,2022 at 9:14AM UTC

    I might ask the question about whether or not they have ever moved from one home to another. If they have not, they do not understand the pressures of getting it done, and being prepared to work again. Explaining the process might shake them loose - but if not, begin the process of letting them choose their fate.