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How do you regain confidence at your new job after leaving a really toxic environment?

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Anonymous

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How do you regain confidence at your new job after leaving a really toxic environment?

I recently changed jobs. The last two years at my previous job were really hell due to a new boss moving me to a position that wasn't a good fit, not having any support or recognition from him and handling a workload that was not realistic. I finally found a new job, but am feeling really lost and fearful. I realize that the way I was treated really scarred me and I am second-guessing myself often. Any thoughts/ suggestions on how to get around this and regain confidence?

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  1. Anonymous

    Does your new company have an EAP benefit? If so, contact them and see if you can get a couple of sessions with a coach or therapist. It would be best to have someone to bounce things off of until you get your bearings. If there is something that requires more in-depth work, they will be able to refer you to get the help you need.

  2. Anonymous

    I would advise doing some creative visualization and writing.

    Create a list of the items in greater detail that you listed above in a spreadsheet. Then one by one come up with a way to not allow that to happen again. In other words what will you do if that behavior rears its head again. Then bury each item after you go through the exercise. Be sure that you focus on one at a time so as not go get overwhelmed. After each one, perhaps one a week or one a day depending upon how you choose to deal with this do something upbeat that promotes the new way you expect to be treated. Additionally in the first month of this new job sit down with your direct manager and let them know how you respond to feedback best. Also let them know what doesn't work for you and what will make you retreat and be less productive. Give yourself some grace during this process as it will be tough but once through it you should see new light at the end.

  3. Anonymous

    Having been there not once but twice in a 40 plus year career. Seek counseling/life coach/career coach. the mental health counseling will be covered under most insurance plans and can prove very beneficial . Life coach/career coach not really.

    Even with counseling there will be days it comes back to haunt you - it is life. But the counseling will help you come up with coping techniques. I didn't do anything but run away the first time. The other job was great and I thought I would stay there until retirement - company bankruptcy stopped that. I found another job and knew it wouldn't be my job until retirement. But because I didn't seek counseling and learn how to believe in myself, and deal with situations when it turned/became toxic, i started doubting myself. Luckily a head hunter approached me about another opportunity. I took it, but also started counseling so I could learn. I have been with this company 19 years. I still work with a life coach occasssionally.

  4. Anonymous

    Counseling. I have been in your shoes a few times and it is trauma. Find a good counselor to help you sort it out. The last thing you want to do is take the old stuff into a new place.

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