Hi everyone!

16 Comments

1. AnonymousMay 7,2023 at 4:48PM UTC

   I would insist on being moved fir your sanity.

2. AnonymousMay 7,2023 at 7:37PM UTC

   This is what I'm trying to do right now actually. The mental pressure of getting the job done and trying not to let this get to me is too much, my husband and friends are all telling me to move. I just want to be sure that I exhausted everything before I throw in the towel!

3. S BrennanMay 7,2023 at 4:48PM UTC

   I have a bunch of questions on this one. Did the former senior manager not do a good enough job transfering the work, expectations and roadmap for this client's deliverables? Why was the other manager moved off the project?

   Perhaps you need to reach out to the former manager that handled this client and get a better download.

   From what you say, your higher ups have faith in you and that you can turn this relationship around.

   I would invite this client to lunch and literally break some bread. Get to know her as a person and perhaps this could change the dynamic. She could be getting pressure herself from her higher ups to deliver as well.

4. AnonymousMay 7,2023 at 7:52PM UTC

   There was no handover, the previous senior manager had to be signed off from work due to health reasons and then went to maternity shortly after that. Her team also did the same, all of them were exhibiting burnout symptoms and were signed off from work by their doctors for weeks before they eventually resigned. I had to find my way through all of it and create a new team to service this client, and the client just doesn't care. Its been a nightmare this past year.

   I have reached out to former senior manager and she did confirm that everything I told her about how the client is behaving has happened before. The client is a difficult one to handle and her main advice is to not let the client's criticisms get to me.

   My bosses are advicing that a face-to-face interaction might help but I'm just terrified that she will just turn it into a rant session and I'm not sure I can take anymore of that. She is under a lot of pressure from her side but unfortunately, even when I told her that we're doing our best to help, she just said its not enough. I feel like any further effort to get on her good side is just me exposing myself to another attack.

5. Mare LevineMay 7,2023 at 5:53PM UTC

   I am sorry this client is such an unprofessional jerk and a bully. She definitely does not look good by behaving like this, and I can see how it would make you want to move to another client and drop her.

   While you clearly have the support of your superiors (which is great!), they unfortunately believe a relationship can still be built. S Brennan made two good suggestions to try to improve things. Firstly, ask the former senior manager what worked for him/her when handling this client. Be prepared s/he may say the bully client treated them badly, too, and they refuse to work with her again.

   Unfortunately, some people enjoy throwing their weight around and trying to make those working with them miserable. Remind yourself that you are in charge of how much you let this situation effect you. You can choose to relentlessly reinforce boundaries, or you can try killing her with kindness.

   For an example of setting boundaries, your client says: "I want you to check this with former account manager."

   You: "I am sorry, that won't be possible, but I can meet with you to brainstorm other options if you don't feel A or B will work for you."

   You: "Yes, my boss is aware of your concerns, however s/he has complete confidence in my ability to manage this project. Should I ask my boss to meet with your boss and discuss the issues you're having? I am concerned our timeline could be in jeopardy with your continued delays."

   Your bosses should be ready to talk to bad client's boss if needed to support you. I have worked at jobs where clients were fired for being bullies, so don't think she has the right to treat you any way she likes.

   Her boss may or may not know how she's behaving, and having your boss talk to hers could provide a reset. Potentially, your bully client may threaten to leave. As a reminder, there should be language in the contract between your company and hers that should protect your company--but that is for your boss to worry about.

   Killing with kindness example: Client bullies

   You: "How about we meet for lunch and we'll go through the list of your concerns?" (If she is close enough to meet face-to-face as S Brennan suggested)

   You: "I will look through the previous documentation on projects for your company with my boss. I can set up an extra meeting for you and I to review." When I have used this, the client quickly stopped asking for me to run it by my boss because she didn't want more meetings with me/about the project.

   My suggestion is to share whatever strategy you decide on moving forward with your bosses before hand so they are prepared if she makes an end run around you in an attempt to get you fired, etc.

   No matter what you decide about this client, make sure your resume is up-to-date and you are ready to job hunt if needed. Everyone should have a back-up plan to move forward.

   Good luck!

6. AnonymousMay 7,2023 at 8:12PM UTC

   This is really great, Mare, thank you for the examples! I'll the try the killing with kindness strategy as I've tried the setting boundaries before and it didn't work, she actually reached out to the previous senior manager (she has her personal number) to get her ideas. My bosses heard about it and told her that the previous senior manager is on maternity so should not br contacted. Unfortunately we suspect she's still doing it.

   She did threaten to pull her account from us repeatedly but its all bark because she just awarded a new project to us and another one is potentially on its way.

   My bosses reassured me there are other clients I can move to but they begged me to wait for at least 6 months until they can convince the previous senior manager to come back full time to this client. I told them I can wait but 6 months feel like a long time now and I'm seriously worried for my mental health.

   I am prepared to move to another company, I just want to be sure I've tried everything as I love working in this company.

7. AnonymousMay 8,2023 at 2:47PM UTC

   This sounds toxic. It is one thing to deal with toxic coworkers, but completely different when the toxic one is a client. I've had that situation before, and all I can say is that the adage "You can please some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time" is true. When I ran into this, I asked and was removed from the project without serious repercussions. If your company won't allow it or has no one to backfill, perhaps it's time to find a new employer.

8. AnonymousMay 8,2023 at 4:30PM UTC

   Its definitely time for a sit down with Ms Cranky pants. Let her know that your leadership supports you being the point person for her clientship and that you want to work with her to provide top level support for her needs. Tell her that you want to shift the narrative that she has been spinning to the upper level about things not working and that you are prepared to meet her needs to the best of your ability but you need her to tone down the complaints unless there is a specific substantive one that you expect she will professionally try to sort out with you before any escalation. Start to keep (if it doesn't exist currently) a shared document -spreadsheet or tracking chart, where you document each request and prioiritize it and give it reference points. Keep it shared with your direct manager and suggest she do the same on her side so that you both are fully in the know about where things are. Ask her directly if there is some other problem that she is experiencing that needs addressing and if she cannot provide one, next time she begins to complain bring it back to your manager for solving. Whatever pressures she is getting on her side of things is not for her to use you as a whipping post to get out. Set the boundaries and keep firm.

9. Audrey KirschMay 8,2023 at 8:38PM UTC

   I've been in that situation before. I kept trying to get away from this one client and have someone help him, especially after he tried to get me fired. My bosses refused to intervene. He finally realized he was stuck with me and that I was doing a good job. I now work alongside of him as he recruited me away. Just keep giving your best. There's always going to be difficult clients. Some just take longer to turn around than others. If she keeps complaining to your bosses and nothing changes, she will realize that she either has to work with you or take her business somewhere else.

10. Erin VegaMay 9,2023 at 3:13AM UTC

    Has management sent out emails or notices to clients that there were going to be account manager changes? If not this is when management should step in and shoot off a quick email to client stating you are their new account manager and are perfectly qualified to handle their account.

    If you don't think management will send this email I would than ask for a quick one on one with the old senior manager if able to and find out why this client is requesting them. Ask if they have any tips or tricks to work with the client and basically how you can be them with this client.

    If able to ask her for a one on one meeting to find out what it is that you have done so that you can correct it. Take notes on your conversation and let her know that you want to help her and that the old senior manager has been moved to a different dept. or whatever the reason they are no longer managing this client. Let the client know that you are eager to work with them and help them in anyway possible.

    This is your time to shine and show management that you can take on any tasks they send your way.

11. AnonymousMay 9,2023 at 12:26PM UTC

    Is this client undermining your core values on what type of consultant you are as well as your company's core values? If the answer is yes, then fire the client. Not worth your reputation and the company. You could be spending time on a client that will truly add value.

12. AnonymousMay 9,2023 at 2:52PM UTC

    Wow, the company is really going about this wrong! I worked in sales, not client service, but we had similar dynamics going on from time to time at the company I worked for (I'm now retired). I can see wanting you to give it some time, but from your comments it sounds like it's been a year! More than long enough, if the client were ever going to come around, she would have by now.

    I knew the execs in charge of client service at my company pretty well, and I'm confident they would have fired this client by now. Calling a former service manager at home on medical leave is a definite no; she would have been instructed not to take those calls. Of course, the hand-off would have been managed by a supervisor if the former client manager had left suddenly without an opportunity for a transition. So many red flags here--you are right to look for another job.

13. MislynMay 10,2023 at 4:35AM UTC

    Having more than one boss is awful because you have two different people with two different opinions on how things should be done or ran and you almost feel in the middle when they are not on the same page.I wish you the best of luck.

14. Liz MilneMay 10,2023 at 4:40AM UTC

    Perhaps it's time for a firm confrontation: 'Former senior management is no longer working this job. I am the right person for this job and I need you to trust me to do the best thing for you, just as she would.'

15. Valerie RiegerMay 25,2023 at 12:57PM UTC

    I would work with her to manage the relationship? Have you asked her what the other manager brought to the table/relationship that makes her hesitant to work with you or trust your decisions? If she worked with the other manager for a long time she may have some separation anxiety . If the organization didn't manage the transition well and assumed that she would be okay with the change, she may be feeling blindsided.

16. AnonymousMay 30,2023 at 8:46PM UTC

    Agree with Valerie's response. To add to that, be firm with the client by reminding her you are in charge of the acct now, and your senior bosses have confidence in you to continue to manage the client's account.