Dealing with imposter syndrome at my new job.

38 Comments

1. AliceJanuary 23,2022 at 1:23PM UTC

   Hello ! A little bit of kindness towards yourself is going to help you. You identified what is going on, tell your “negative voice” that you’re busy now and that you actually don’t need them right now. Lie on the couch right now and breath in deeply for 5 min. Say out loud that everything is OK and “ I am Ok”. Best, A.

2. Constance RobersonJanuary 23,2022 at 2:40PM UTC

   Read through the information supplied to you for your job.

   Make yourself familiar with what you need to know and you will use/need most frequently/most often, this is a priority. Make a schedule for your daily duties in order to cover your responsibilities each day. Eventually, you become faster and more knowledgeable in each area. Prioritize by their priority needed in the course of each day finish first. in your spare time or at home reading through your materials and/or information daily to familiarize yourself with the standards of your new employer. Even though or if you have previous experience every company does things differently. Make notes to bring up that will benefit your new company from your experience when allowed or if given the opportunity soon after being hired, you will have your notes ready. Appearing well organized and prepared is always key and your product knowledge and information is number one inside and out is a must. This earns you promotions. Now, I ask you, doesn't this information allow you to feel confident and elevating the nervous energy on a new job will surely be suppressed from day one when following and sticking to these guidelines in addition to giving you the confidence for promotions in the future. Show them what you're really made of stands out in your preparation without having to say a word people notice, Also, preparation gives you confidence introducing yourself emulating professionalism at its finest.

3. Erin RJanuary 24,2022 at 1:09PM UTC

   I am in the same boat. Done with week 1 but feeling a little bit unsure of myself. Old coworkers of mine reminded me that I felt the same way years ago when I started. Part of it (for me) is that I’m starting remotely so those natural connections I made in passing aren’t being made. But give yourself some grace, time will also get you in your groove & you will get to know your role + make your connections. Be kind to yourself. It’s easier said than done but take people up when they offer up to assist with questions or making connections. It makes a difference. Best of luck!

4. Sunshine SeymourJanuary 24,2022 at 1:15PM UTC

   Ask yourself a few questions:

   I'm I qualified for this position?

   Was the position misleading?

   Did I inflating my competency and abilities to get my foot in the door?

   Your in now what?!?! If you are qualified, the position wasn't completely miss leading, but is presenting some challenges, rise to the expectation level. Seek training, mentorship, or YouTube it. Start with the "anty-up" approach. You must have value that the company recognize which lead to you being selected for the position. Fear is natural but use it to fuel you winning.

5. AnonymousJanuary 24,2022 at 1:25PM UTC

   I'm not the biggest fan of self-help books/material, but I've been listening to Dr. Laurie Santos (the Yale prof whose online offering of one of her courses, "The Psychology of Well-Being," has had *hundreds of thousands* of ppl taking it) on her accompanying podcast "The Happiness Lab." Her methodology is science- and practice-based.

   Much of what she deals with isn't specific to the workplace, but I find a lot of the discussion is actually applicable to it.

   The most salient point to you that I've heard her discuss -- and she has many, many amazing topics/guests -- is to talk to yourself in the 3rd person ("[your name], you've just started a job -- let's talk about how it's going") b/c even subtly, the distancing you have in removing the "I" is effective in looking at a situation more objectively.

   Then, you can apply some of the great advice other posters have given, but with that objectivity and even empathy (& compassion, which = empathy + action), so that you're able to more clearly, and kindly, see where you're at.

   And BTW, imposter syndrome, at least in my case, is something that can stick around long after the first week/month/year, so this practice can be useful long after that first week. Good luck. You've got this!

   PS -- I know others may have seen this kind of advice -- I just really appreciate the framework within which Santos presents these issues.

6. GirlBossanova934974January 24,2022 at 1:31PM UTC

   Perhaps you should ask yourself a question. Why did I LEAVE my last position or job? Was I bored, not paid enough, didn't like so and so, career development path was really rotten? Probably one or more of the above, right? Well the road back does not look promising. Moving forward is about achieving PERSONAL GROWTH. With Growth, sometimes comes RISK! RISK you might not succeed as much as you think you should. But sometimes things seem a bit more difficult than they really are. Sometimes, you have to get out of your comfort zone and put a bit more into the deal to succeed. Once you have conquered this obstacle, you will be well on your way and gained valuable experience. Experience teaches you that you can do it. And you can. I say this after 34 years of business experience in a wide variety of jobs, industries, situations, etc. In my new position, there have been one or 2 people who sought to intimidate or frighten me. I find that rather humorous. Been there. Done that. Next! Keeping going is a big part of coming out on top.

7. AnonymousJanuary 24,2022 at 1:37PM UTC

   Try to get out of your head and focus on learning.
   Learning includes asking questions and reading about the company. I’m a global learner. If I don’t know the whole story behind the job function, I feel overwhelmed to learn it and feel like I am in over my head. But the expression is really just that - you are in your head too much to learn it. once I focus on learning, I usually settle down.

8. Kelli ThompsonJanuary 24,2022 at 1:48PM UTC

   I’ve changed jobs many times over the course of my career.
   For me, this was always exciting part until the “new job smell” wore off. Then, it was just another day at work.

   The reality would sink in that I was a beginner again. I sat in meetings with big, unknown words and I couldn’t think of ways to contribute.

   Frankly, I felt “stupid” because I was no longer an expert. This insecurity often kept me silent in meetings because of doubt and imposter syndrome.

   I learned I had to change my goal. I learned that my success in the first 90 days wasn’t determined by my company acronym mastery, it was more likely that my success was determined by how well I could learn and connect with my new team.

   When the pressure of performance was gone, I was less self-critical. I had to learn that I could feel uncomfortable AND still be confident.

   If you’re feeling overwhelmed and imposter-y, check your goal. Is it expertise/results or connection/learning? What would serve you better?

9. ramatallahi balogunJanuary 24,2022 at 2:06PM UTC

   I started my new job 7 months ago and for the first 3 months, I felt exactly like this. I talked to my manager about it and she was very assuring. I know it's too early to talk to someone in the company about this but know that they knew that you could do the job that's why they hired you. You should also cut yourself some slack and give yourself time to get used to things.

10. Neelima KoneruJanuary 24,2022 at 2:12PM UTC

    I came here seeking advice with the same concern. So glad you posted this question! I loved all the answers Coincidentally, I enrolled in ‘The psychology of Well Being’ course yesterday. And I started cutting my negative thoughts when they start creeping up.

    One thing that has helped me is to recollect all the achievements I have accomplished in my career including the big and small wins. That boosts my morale and gives me confidence that I can overcome this hurdle just like many others in the past. Good luck to both of us!!

11. AnonymousJanuary 24,2022 at 8:01PM UTC

    I'm the OP on "Psychology of Well-Being." So glad to hear you're in the course and benefitting from it! Like I said, I find a LOT of what Santos covers to be applicable in the workspace. And, of course, beyond....

12. AnonymousJanuary 24,2022 at 2:12PM UTC

    These feelings are 100% natural in ANY ROLE. So firstly, you've got to understand this. You must remind yourself that management hired you- among other candidates- so you must have offered them what they were looking for, including faults and inadequacies! :) Thirdly, we often sense "imposter" syndrome when a job or other opportunity means alot to us, and we don't want to botch it up...that's a completely natural feeling too! So, be easy on yourself. you are NOT going to know everything, everyone, etc. My best advice is to listen WELL, speak LITTLE, ask precise questions after you've put a few things together (seek out trustworthy mentors at work), be humble, be diligent, stay organized, and move forward. It will all come with time, I promise. Starting a new job is a huge stress, and there's no easy way around this. Back in the day, we didn't use the phrase "Imposter Syndrome"....that phrase is a new way of saying the same old things: "I just started a new job and I'm super nervous and feeling inadequate". A problem since the beginning of time, in any new and meaningful situation.

13. kate seebachJanuary 24,2022 at 2:38PM UTC

    same, what should I do

14. Meredith SwainJanuary 24,2022 at 2:48PM UTC

    Here are a few tips that I’ve found helpful:

    (1) Take a step back to look at the bigger picture. Ask yourself ‘what facts support that you deserve to be in your new role?’ Compare where you were last year or five years ago to today.

    (2) When I feel a negative self-talk spiral come on, I try to be more mindful. I don’t label my thoughts, I just notice them.

    (3) Think about how you might support a friend who feels like an imposter or minimizes their accomplishments and then applying the same supportive language to yourself.

    (4) Ask myself ‘what’s the payoff of continuing to have the same mindset around feeling like an imposter?’

15. Rebecca AliJanuary 24,2022 at 2:53PM UTC

    I tell everyone who starts a new role - give yourself 3-6 months to get a feel for the job, organization and your co-workers. It's like any relationship - it takes time to build trust in each other. Also, if you walk into any job at 100%, you are not going to be challenged and will be bored in 6 months and want out. Like most things in life - it's a marathon not a sprint. Enjoy the process - as a society we focus way too much on the outcome and not enough on how we get there.

    Side note - some companies use acronyms to short cut their language. Don't be afraid to ask what the heck it all means. I've been in meetings and said "okay, I'm new here but when you say X, what are you referring to?" Don't assume anything. Good luck!

16. Kirsten SchmittJanuary 24,2022 at 4:08PM UTC

    Exactly! There are no dumb questions. Each company has its own culture, language, and flow. Absolutely give yourself several months to get acclimated. They hired you for a good reason and you are worthy. Good luck.

17. ANNA SENJanuary 24,2022 at 9:54PM UTC

    They don’t always give you 3-6 months to settle in. I was let go after 2 months for not performing well enough- just when I was starting to find my feet. And just before Christmas.

18. Joann S. LublinJanuary 24,2022 at 3:53PM UTC

    Your best strategy is to combat negative self-talk with positive self-talk -- by reminding yourself about past successes and your ability to adapt to new situations. I would highly recommend you check out by my extensive coverage of "imposter syndrome" cures in my 2016 book, "Earning It: Hard-Won Lessons rrom Trailblazing Women at the Top of the Business World."

19. EMILY KIKUE FRANKJanuary 24,2022 at 4:01PM UTC

    Did you know that Michelle Obama struggles with impostor syndrome? It's something I see a lot of high-achieving women face. Breathe through it, notice negative self-talk, and remind yourself of other challenges you've faced. And don't be afraid to ask questions! You're still new and learning all the stuff takes time. You've got this. :-)

20. Barb HansenJanuary 24,2022 at 4:26PM UTC

    1-Trust the people who hired you

    You were interviewed by a person (or more than one person) at your new company who knew the job that needed to be filled, and probably have more experience than you do.

    Those people offered you a job.

    Trust that those people made the right decision (because they did)

21. Karen GongawareJanuary 24,2022 at 4:30PM UTC

    Why sabotage yourself? Get out of your own way and do the job. You have been there ONE WEEK and are ready to walk? Remember, you chose to accept the position because you believed in your abilities to do the job. Now catch that positive feeling and belief back and go forth!

22. SarahJanuary 25,2022 at 7:33PM UTC

    Beautiful. Well said ?

23. AnonymousJanuary 24,2022 at 5:20PM UTC

    1 - Adjusting to a new company takes time (learning procedures, acronyms, who does what, even internal software and systems); this is more exhausting than we tend to realize.

    2 - They hired you because they thought you could do the job. Believe them.

    3 - Find your voice. Practice speaking up in meetings earlier than you might have before. Your opinions have value; get used to sharing them.

    4 - Work to combat overthinking. I found the book “Soundtracks” by Jon Acuff to be incredibly helpful in replacing negative self talk with positive “slogans.”

24. Jackie RukaJanuary 24,2022 at 5:30PM UTC

    It takes time to settle into a new role and another segment to make it your own. Have patience with yourself.

    Focus on learning and leading right now. Not do it all be it all mentality.

    Just breathe, enjoy the journey. It’s not a sprint.

    I suggest you get a coach for support and self expression as you grow into a new role it may help.

25. TraceyJanuary 24,2022 at 6:42PM UTC

    I’ve been reading the confidence gap by Russ Harris. Our brains are great at giving us reasons for why we might fail. Keep your focus on your goals & give yourself grace. It takes at least a year to transition into a new role. Even in the hustle culture, a year!

26. Sidney BristowJanuary 24,2022 at 11:41PM UTC

    Give yourself 3 months. Don't make any decisions or judgments until then. Easier said than done i know, but try to give yourself some grace, go with the flow, absorb your surroundings, be open, and see how things look after 90 days.

27. Clydene HorriganJanuary 24,2022 at 11:44PM UTC

    I attended a Women in Tech conference, and one of the tips spoke to how being new can be a great advantage to teams because you’re looking st things with fresh eyes. Hopefully your company will feel this way.

28. SarahJanuary 25,2022 at 2:23AM UTC

    Dear Self-Talk,

    Nothing is Negative or Positive/ Good or Bad until you think it so.

    You ALWAYS have a choice to accept negative thoughts or not. What do YOU choose? I choose positive no matter my situation.

29. AnonymousJanuary 25,2022 at 1:36PM UTC

    A new Company and a new position is overwhelming. I would write down what specifically is making you feel like you are in "way over your head" as you put it. Break it all down into it's most basic components. ID anything that really is something you are struggling with versus things you know/can do, that way you have action items that will help reduce that overwhelming feeling of doubt.

    As silly as it sounds, put a post it note on your monitors, laptop or somewhere you will see if often with the words "I CAN DO THIS". Sometimes just seeing those words can give you that little mental/energy boost to get past the momentary doubt.

    Most of all, Be Kind to yourself. It is so easy for us to judge ourselves in the worst light and be impatient with the process of learning something new. Allow yourself to not know everything immediately.

    YOU CAN DO THIS!!

30. AnonymousJanuary 25,2022 at 3:42PM UTC

    I am literally going through what OP is dealing with and your words were right on time!

31. Elizabeth HallJanuary 25,2022 at 2:08PM UTC

    You have to be an imposter before you can become a master.
    It's just part of the learning and development process. If you're taking on challenging jobs, you'll probably always feel like an imposter for a while as you develop the skills you need to do the job and do it well. The only real question is whether you are putting in the work to become the master you aspire to be.

32. AnonymousJanuary 25,2022 at 2:16PM UTC

    I could have written this. I'm assuming you're also onboarding virtually which makes things doubly difficult too. I've made sure I have 1:1 time with my manager and I ensure that I ask for feedback/advice regularly on what I can do, what does success look like for me (so I know I'm not just sitting around all day chasing my tail, but actively working towards something), etc.

    Solidarity fist bumps - it's not a nice feeling. Let's both of us remember that the people who hired us hired us because they believed in us. One tip I had from a coach was to counter any claims of imposter syndrome with evidence. e.g. "why did I think I'd be a good project manager; I'm SO disorganised!" Evidence: at my last job I transformed lots of little bits of siloed work into a complex marketing program, with a happy team at the end of it. I bet you anything you'd be able to do similar. Good luck!

33. Mery RamirezJanuary 25,2022 at 3:20PM UTC

    Take it one step at a time. Starting a new job is always nerve wrecking and intimidating - there is so much you need to get acclimated to and people you need to connect with. BUT remember, YOU LANDED the job and you're not expected to do everything day 1. I think many people feel like they need to hit the ground running and accomplish everything the first week but that shouldn't be the case. Break down what you are trying to accomplish into chunks with your manager. Think about what you need to accomplish immediately and what can wait or might take some time before seeing payoffs. It's all about aligning expectations and objectives. Things seem more achievable when you start breaking them down into smaller chunks and set dates on it. Don't get discouraged or overwhelmed, take one step at a time - it's a marathon, not a sprint.

34. Sands TimeJanuary 25,2022 at 7:46PM UTC

    Question is did you lie to land the job and now actually realize you can't learn as you go, because you have to know what you are doing to actually get the job done?
    Now please don't get insulted I am just asking. I did that once and learned my lesson. I will never take a job I know I can't do and think that I will "wing it" once I'm in. There are some positions you just can't "wing it" on and get away with it. It's just a life lesson I learned and just passing it on. It doesn't feel good to feel insecure and helpless because you can't complete the task your boss gave you. Good luck think it over and if you decide you can't hack, there is a job waiting for you, where you will be happy and 100% able to full fill. God bless.

35. Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition SpecialistJanuary 25,2022 at 9:39PM UTC

    My advice is give yourself a break.

    CONGRATULATIONS on your new job!

    They hired you because they believed you could do the job. I'm assuming you applied and interviewed for the job because you believed you could do the job.

    Stop worrying about failing and concentrate on succeeding.

    GOOD LUCK!!!

36. Christine CovingtonJanuary 26,2022 at 1:54PM UTC

    What you’re feeling is 100% normal! Give yourself grace but don’t cut yourself any slack. The first 3-6 months (or more) of a new role is a period of learning. But you also have to commit to bringing your B+ game while working on your A game. You were chosen for reason. Unless you lied your tooshy off, you are where you are for good reason. :)

37. Jana StraubharJanuary 26,2022 at 2:43PM UTC

    You are not alone. What you are describing is more common than you think. Have you developed a 90-day plan that allows you time to 1) learn about your people and their specific working styles, needs, and expectations; 2) identified strategic partners and stakeholders and starting building relationships, and 3) identified mentors who can guide your thinking?

38. Stephanie F, MSHRMFebruary 5,2022 at 11:26PM UTC

    This!
    You definitely want to develop a 90-day plan.
    Number 1 will help you identify your expectations and how to use your knowledge and abilities to proceed.
    But it also helps you learn that you shouldn’t be expected to know it all right away and those people you build relationships with can be resources and sounding boards when needed.
    Give yourself grace!
    And congratulations on the new position!