Ageism and Misogyny from Tech Consultant

5 Comments

1. AnonymousSeptember 13,2024 at 6:44PM UTC

   You document ALL concerns in writing with risks clearly outline along with potential costs.

   You absolutely don't get into challenging the consultant. You just need to be highly specific and very careful.

2. AnonymousSeptember 13,2024 at 8:41PM UTC

   How are your meetings conducted? I would suggest you let the CEO and his AA know that you are recording the meetings. If they don't want you to, use your cell phone to tape it. And then meet with the CEO's AA after each meeting. Regardless of the friend reference or bro reference, they can get in big trouble. Consult an attorney and have them sit in on the meetings. I guarantee that would stop it. And also, speak up. Let him know, you know I am credentialed in that area and I also have annual CEU's that are required to maintain my credential. Do you have any other questions for me regarding my experience, background or credentials? I hate to say this but ageism and misogyny exists in women as well. I hear it on a daily basis. It's not directed at me, but just in general a person who has extreme low self esteem makes comments about the size of women, and she's a female. She is intimidated by women in general as we are strong women around her and projects her insecurities on others. My reply if said in front of me, is, does she have any redeeming characteristics other than her size? It usually shuts it down. I absolutely hate it but it's just how they are. I wrote in an earlier post the day she said, no one in here can where that size. I said, speak for yourself and walked away. Speak up always. Anyway, do speak up and for yourself. You will not damage anything, you will teach him to respect you. He's pushing your buttons to see how far he can go.

3. Barb HansenSeptember 13,2024 at 9:12PM UTC

   Yikes, bro relationships can be super difficult to negiotate but occasionly senior leadership can see beyond the bro.

   Here is how i would handle this situation.

   I would document the potential delay to the project if you have to respond to the technical consultants requirement for additional documentation.

   I would present the new timeline to the team (or team lead or your hiring manager which could be the CEO).

   If the team/team lead is okay with the additional work which will impact the timeline, I would do the additional work. And I would continue to document the impact for every additional step that the bro needed me to do (even if in theory the additional work is approved) because I wouldn't want any blow back on me.

   There is a change that the team/team lead/hiring manager won't want the additional documentation done because of the impact to the overall timeline. Bro relationships can lose out to additional costs.

   Good luck!

4. AnonymousSeptember 15,2024 at 1:18PM UTC

   I would tell them they hired me to do a job, either they trust that I have the knowledge and experience to do that or you don’t. Put the ball back in their court. I would not play his games.

5. AnonymousSeptember 15,2024 at 3:26PM UTC

   As a consultant you have been hired as the expert. Be the expert, let the CEO know that the things that this person is suggesting will affect the cost of the project and that you have concerns about this. Let him know that you are being talked down to and while your ego is NOT involved and on the personal side you can deal with someone speaking in a condescending way if they need to feel their own self importance- but to be dismissive means the CEO is not getting your best work and you are concerned that there is some issue with this persons communicating to you as an older person. Keep it simple but be firm and then ask him how he wants to solve this. If the AA attends all conversations you could ask for her to record them or to transcribe them as proof if that is an easier path.