Thoughts on discussing pay with co workers?

59 Comments

1. JenniferOctober 16,2022 at 9:06PM UTC

   Don't do it.

2. AnonymousOctober 16,2022 at 9:50PM UTC

   Why? That's private and very few people want to share.

3. AnonymousOctober 16,2022 at 10:28PM UTC

   Nothing good comes from talking about it with peers.

4. Holly NunnallyOctober 16,2022 at 10:37PM UTC

   *Not* discussing salaries only benefits the employer. My thought is that if all parties involved are comfortable talking about it, and it doesn't go against company policy, go for it.

   Be prepared to ruffle feathers, possibly have your feelings hurt/hurt someone else's feelings, and/or face disciplinary action.

   There's a reason employers don't want employees discussing these things.

5. AnonymousOctober 16,2022 at 11:06PM UTC

   I just feel it causes drama and hard feelings.

6. AnonymousOctober 16,2022 at 10:38PM UTC

   I have asked co-workers AFTER we were no longer working together at the same company. That information helped me know what to ask for at my next job or for raises when I was still in the same company.

   Usually I just check the semi-anonymous sources like Glassdoor or Salary,com.

7. AnonymousOctober 18,2022 at 5:33AM UTC

   Glassdoor salary estimates are virtually worthless these days. Before, you could see the metrics for the reported salaries. So the low/med/high for salary and for additional comp. Now, you don't see that. Instead, they are VERY Confident in all salaries based on their proprietary salary tool. They are "Very Confident" when there are zero salaries reported.

8. AnonymousOctober 16,2022 at 10:38PM UTC

   Only if you are ready to handle the truth and not try to use the info to complain and compare yourself to others to your boss.

9. AnonymousOctober 16,2022 at 11:33PM UTC

   Someone will be unhappy. Someone with 20 years experience can do a 20 times better job because of that experience or can have given up the will to live because they have been doing the same thing for 20 years.

10. AnonymousOctober 17,2022 at 2:04AM UTC

    Don’t do it…not worth any tension and resentment when full situation‘s aren’t always able to be discussed.

11. Veronica PattyOctober 17,2022 at 3:20AM UTC

    There are a lot of variables; for example, years of experience and type of previous experience (complexity), education, as well as going market rate. What I’ve felt comfortable offering is advice but not hard numbers. In particular, to ask for the current pay band and to research on professional sites the going-rate that best matches their years of experience and job title. Even similar job titles can change in requirements over the years as more education or different set of skills are required.

12. AnonymousOctober 19,2022 at 10:24PM UTC

    I hear this advice to research reputable sites, and in theory, it makes sense. However, you usually find a big range or you can’t find the job title you’re looking for. For example, my title is senior manager, professional services. Last time I looked, there were no matches. If I looked for senior manager, I found lots of data with a big variety of wages.

13. Jackie GhedineOctober 17,2022 at 11:52AM UTC

    Just be ok with what you learn.

    People who stay in organizations for a long time are mostly underpaid compared to peers with the same job/title (often less experience) who came from the outside.

14. Erin BeemerOctober 17,2022 at 12:20PM UTC

    Several years ago I had a salary discussion with a male colleague and while we didn't discuss hard numbers, we did discuss range.
    I came to understand I was being underpaid and I did use the information to encourage me to negotiate a raise. I did not use his name. My boss at the time unwisely assumed I'd talked to a different person, thus showing that there were at least 2 data points proving I needed a raise. :)

    The key here is that it needs to be someone you trust, and you need to be prepared to find out one person in the discussion is being paid less. You also need to use a bit of common sense to consider factors like experience, degree(s), etc.

15. Yolanda SouthOctober 17,2022 at 2:10PM UTC

    I have found when coworkers discuss salary it is never a good thing. There are so many factors that go into who is getting paid what, as has been noted in previous posts, longevity, experience, education. And many times someone who is a long-time employee is actually under the current pay range for a position due to adjustments. I believe if you feel you are under your range it requires research and a conversation with Management. Your coworker can't increase your salary so why speak to them. Found out what common salary ranges are for the position, document your strengths and accomplishments and request a raise!

    PS I also wish position postings would include salary ranges to eliminate waste of time applying and interviewing for a position that is not within your range.

16. MichelleOctober 17,2022 at 3:35PM UTC

    Do it!

17. AnonymousOctober 17,2022 at 5:48PM UTC

    I have worked for companies that if you were caught discussing salaries that you could be terminated. This can cause lots of issues and hard feelings among employees.

18. Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition SpecialistOctober 17,2022 at 8:56PM UTC

    That's illegal.

19. AnonymousOctober 18,2022 at 2:00AM UTC

    Yes they can’t fire you for it. But I feel it causes issues.

20. Barbara WallisOctober 19,2022 at 4:01PM UTC

    It is illegal to fire someone for discussing pay.

    Check out: Your Right to Discuss Wages | National Labor Relations Board (nlrb.gov)

21. Sharon GrehanOctober 17,2022 at 7:12PM UTC

    Instead of discussing with co-workers (where you don't have context for any discrepancies), have you tried asking your manager what your salary compa-ratio is? If you find it's low, you can ask what skill sets and/or experiences can help you get to a higher ratio.

22. AnonymousOctober 17,2022 at 8:59PM UTC

    I'm not opposed with discussing pay with coworkers; however, I've never attempted to and I've never had anyone ask me, either.

    I guess my thinking is you have the convo w/ colleague, you'll probably discover a pay gap / disparity (as y'all have said, there could be lots of factors riding on pay differences), then what happens?

    Like, I'm here for pay equity across the board, but sometimes I wonder, even if you have the info to back up you and your coworkers pay gap, will management do anything about it to change it? Is it even worth going to management about? Or, do you still say something, hear their response, and depending on what they say, what will you do?

    Will continue to follow this thread to see what others are saying -- good topic!

23. AnonymousOctober 18,2022 at 1:57AM UTC

    I had one job where one co worker asked me a few times. I always said I didn’t discuss that. I personally feel it creates drama.

24. Lisa WilliamsOctober 18,2022 at 12:18PM UTC

    Although the law permits it, on a personal level, I never discuss my pay with co-workers, and it's not something anyone has ever asked me.

25. Melissa NobileOctober 18,2022 at 12:38PM UTC

    Big fat NO.

26. Valerie RiegerOctober 18,2022 at 12:48PM UTC

    My pay is my business and I don't discuss it with my coworkers.

27. Shelly EdwardsOctober 18,2022 at 1:56PM UTC

    I have never discussed my pay with my coworkers. How much I make is my business only and as an HR professional, I see how discussing it leads to so many other problems. I work in manufacturing, though, and it shocks me to learn that most of our people in the shop discuss their pay rates on a regular basis. I have employees come to me all of the time wanting a raise because the person next to them makes more money. What they don't understand is that person has been here longer, has more experience or does more than they do. It really just causes too many issues for people to discuss their pay rates.

28. AnonymousOctober 18,2022 at 7:40PM UTC

    how do they take it when you deny them a raise?

29. Jacqueline CutlerOctober 18,2022 at 3:38PM UTC

    I wouldn't do it.

    Only once, did a co-worker and I make a pact as the company transitioned from one owner to another and we had the same job, so we held out for the same (paltry) pay.

    Otherwise, I have found that if someone you disdain and know that you work harder than is making even $1 a week more you are sure to be resentful. It is unlikely the money would change and I don't see the benefits -- unless, of course, you are in a union shop.

30. AnonymousOctober 18,2022 at 3:39PM UTC

    In Colorado, companies are required to post the pay rates for jobs posted. Perhaps you can route them to those job postings to get pay rates rather than getting into an uncomfortable discussion.

31. Monika SimondsOctober 19,2022 at 4:45AM UTC

    Starting in 2023 California and Washington State are following suit. I believe it's already in place in New York City as well. Those are just the ones I know of.

    Agree with the poster - just direct them to the company website....

32. Clydene HorriganOctober 19,2022 at 10:16PM UTC

    This may not be helpful because location factors into wages.

33. AnonymousOctober 18,2022 at 4:48PM UTC

    I'm a government employee and our salaries are posted online. But mine is wrong by 25% and has been for years (maybe some funding is coming from a different source - office hr person is a gossip so I've never been willing to ask). Makes me question all of the data. Did use the info to negotiate a substantial raise at one point.

34. AnonymousOctober 18,2022 at 5:11PM UTC

    I'd rather not. Now granted, my colleagues and I all have access to what one another makes (we are in HR) but as the new kid on the block I really have no desire to know what everyone else is making nor do I really care. I've seen many past (and even current) coworkers where it leads to resentment without knowing or even caring why the difference in pay.

35. AnonymousOctober 19,2022 at 1:13AM UTC

    Don’t do it.

36. Orlagh CostelloOctober 19,2022 at 12:13PM UTC

    I have discussed pay bands with people - and most companies I have worked for does this, have a pay band for X level of employee. It's a way to make sure people are paid equally without discounting experience etc. But unless people are upfront about things like that, it's very easy for companies to discriminate, no matter how unconsciously, particularly against women, POC, etc (the usual intersectional stuff really - the more boxes you tick, the further down the pay scale you probably are)

37. Shelby COctober 19,2022 at 12:20PM UTC

    It is like Fight Club. "The first rule of fight club is you don't talk about fight club. The second rule is you do not talk about fight club," but how do you think everyone knows about it? We all whisper about it. It is in poor taste and a bad idea, but we still do it.

    I think the best thing to do is to keep it vague and discuss bands or grades if you have that kind of system.

38. AnonymousOctober 19,2022 at 12:33PM UTC

    Isnt is the way to confirm if you are underpay? As sad as it is to compare, its very eye opening! I wouldnt ask but I am open to this conversation with close colleagues

39. AnonymousOctober 19,2022 at 12:33PM UTC

    I’m all for it.
    Pay transparency leads to pay equality. How can we as women ensure we are paid equally if we don't have benchmarks. That’s how I found that I made $30k less than my male counterpart even though we had the same credentials and years of experience and I had more time with the company. We were in the same pay band but it really showed the inequity. We are conditioned to feel insecure and defensive about pay which doesn’t help.

40. AnonymousOctober 19,2022 at 12:44PM UTC

    I had the exact same experience. Women were routinely paid less and we didn’t know until a male colleague shared his salary and others followed his lead. It was a game changer and brought big shifts in rectifying the problem

41. AnonymousOctober 19,2022 at 12:33PM UTC

    In an ideal world, it would be perfectly fine to discuss your salary with your coworkers.
    But I wouldn’t. There are so many nuances tied to what each individual is paid. People can be really weird about money. Some people have issues with anyone who makes more than they do. So if you happen to make more than your coworker and you talk about salary, that coworker might all of a sudden have a problem with you. But they might not be aware of aspects of your experience, education, and accomplishments that warrant your higher salary and wouldn’t care even if you explained that. Or maybe you’re just better at negotiating than they are. In any case, probably not a good idea to talk about it.

42. BrendaOctober 19,2022 at 12:34PM UTC

    never- it creates resentment

43. Arlene Frances Gottardo (Bryak)October 19,2022 at 12:43PM UTC

    never a great idea

44. AnonymousOctober 19,2022 at 1:13PM UTC

    Always! Frequently, in fact. Talk about it any time someone asks. Talk about it if you feel like you may have gotten a bum deal in your annual review. In the US, discussing pay with your colleagues is a right protected by the NLRB. Any company with a policy (whether official or unofficial) discouraging employees from discussing pay is likely breaking the law. Wage transparency is the only way to close the pay gap, period. We can’t know if we’re equal if we don’t know what others are being paid for the same work.

45. AnonymousOctober 19,2022 at 1:15PM UTC

    I was raised to never discuss money with anyone other than spouse. NEVER discuss salary at work. that being said, I am a state employee now and our salaries are public information, you just look up on the website. And yes, it causes resentment amoung some of the ranks.

46. Jessica Hill-KnudsonOctober 19,2022 at 1:40PM UTC

    You don't have to mention your specific salary, give a range. It will be particularly enlightening if you ask a male colleague in the same position if they think $X salary/hourly wage is fair. Particularly ask if 10% higher than what you make. If you make $43,000 per year, ask them if they think $47,000 is fair. Quite possible you'll find out that they think that is too low, and then you've found out you're definitely being underpaid.

    Companies don't want you to talk about pay because they want to keep paying women less for the same amount of work. Granted, if someone has more experience and more skills, they deserve more than someone who isn't at the same level.

47. BeaBoss645203October 19,2022 at 2:04PM UTC

    I have found that it is never a good idea - people get very funny about money and resentful

48. gailsnewglamlife@gmail.comOctober 19,2022 at 2:19PM UTC

    I do not, end of story. Enjoy your day.

49. Melissa VerdoniOctober 19,2022 at 3:05PM UTC

    wow amazing how many people are worried about co-workers being happy with their salary, then gender equality, this is why we are STILL here folks in 2022/2023 ... things NEED to change. If a person has higher credentials and more seniority , that is COMMON knowledge.,ZERO a secret. and bosses should never be scared of saying you want her salary , then do this and that. period. i dont even understand why salary is even a private thing. that ONLY serves the bosses as it allows them to underpay.

50. AmyOctober 19,2022 at 4:40PM UTC

    Yes this! Keeping quiet about your salary was started by big businesses to keep us all uninformed. Sure you may get upset finding out someone is making more than you, but let that be the motivator that makes you reflect what you brought to the company and ask for a raise/promotion or new position/job. Or start your own business, or join a group of others working on transparency and equality. Get angry/upset and then get back up and stop letting them underpay us.

51. BrendaOctober 19,2022 at 6:55PM UTC

    it wasnt started by big businesses.. it was started by people saying it's none of anyone's business. I guess you regularly tell people how much you have in your bank account? it's no ones business but your own

52. Melissa VerdoniOctober 19,2022 at 8:30PM UTC

    sorry but that s just WRONG , BOSSES even try to fire people .... it was NEVER about not being anyones's business.... my friends dont know how much i make , it doesn t concern them, if i am being underpayed , or wadge gap cuz i am a woman , i DESERVE / NEED to know perioid , thats no even up for discussion.

53. AmyOctober 19,2022 at 9:16PM UTC

    Hi Brenda, I may be wrong and big business did not start it. It may have started way back from the puritan upbringing and kept going for centuries with generations of people saying 'we don't talk about this or that". Either way it has led to some inequality and unhealthy work environments. It is illegal for businesses to say you are not allowed to talk about salary. I agree that if you don't want to tell anyone you don't have too, just tell them you would rather not or are uncomfortable with it while still letting others share. Transparency would be very helpful in some sectors where many are underpaid. And I don't think it is the same as how much I have in the bank. My ability or inability to save up money is another issue all together.

54. Ruth SathreOctober 19,2022 at 5:07PM UTC

    Each evaluation and pay review begins with a reminder not to talk about money with coworkers.

55. AnonymousOctober 19,2022 at 5:50PM UTC

    I have never been told that during a review.

56. AnonymousOctober 19,2022 at 6:13PM UTC

    If your employer is telling you that you cannot discuss pay that is illegal.

    Here is a tiny bit from the NLRB website:

    Under the National Labor Relations Act (NLRA or the Act), employees have the right to communicate with other employees at their workplace about their wages. Wages are a vital term and condition of employment, and discussions of wages are often preliminary to organizing or other actions for mutual aid or protection.

    You may have discussions about wages when not at work, when you are on break, and even during work if employees are permitted to have other non-work conversations. You have these rights whether or not you are represented by a union.

    Protected conversations about wages may take on many forms, including having conversations about how much you and your colleagues and managers make, presenting joint requests concerning pay to your employer...

57. Audrey KirschOctober 19,2022 at 9:09PM UTC

    I'm happy to discuss my salary. I hate the secrecy that some employers put on employees not to discuss it. It's just a way to keep everyone from knowing if they are the lucky one getting the good raise or the one who is getting cheated. Lots of co-workers don't want to discuss it and I'm okay with that. I'm into transparency so for me it's an okay topic.

58. Kristen ScanlonOctober 19,2022 at 9:12PM UTC

    It is completely up to you and your co-workers, and what people are comfortable talking about. Bosses cannot say to not talk about it. And, if there is transparency in pay and pay scales, then there shouldn’t be the fear of it being talked about.

59. AnonymousOctober 19,2022 at 10:39PM UTC

    I once worked for a company that said they did some sort of market research on our salaries when a group of workers were balking about not being paid for our worth. They were also big into not having employees discussing actual numbers with each other. Each of us in my department met individually with our bosses and HR, with much pomp and circumstance. I was told that my salary was right on the mark for an average to high range for my type of job. I was then asked to sign off on it. I refused and wanted to see the data. Management indicated they would have to get back to me on it. It went on for weeks of them trying to convince me their super secret research was true, but never actually producing anything showing me how it was so correct. Everyone else signed off and said things like "At least they looked into it" while I was holding out. Finally, my boss and an HR rep met with me and "somehow" had rechecked their (likely fictional) information and I qualified for a big , fat raise- but only if signed off on it with a non disclosure. So fake and unfair, but I took the money. A few years later, restructuring of my department and processes in the company and the whole department was let go, with offsite people in another city taking our case loads. My parting gift to other employees I knew was to tell my story about how salaries were "determined" in a vague enough way so I couldn't get into trouble. Hell, I was fired anyways, right?!?