How do you know if the job isn't right for you?

Anonymous

February 14,2023 at 12:23AM UTC

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How do you know if the job isn't right for you?

I have been with the org for 7 months. My boss so far supports me in important ways. However, there is so much drama and turmoil (grade school gossip coming from peers who are "leadership"trying to turn people against me for just doing my job), it turns my stomach. I do not look forward to my days. I work at an executive level.

Is this enough time to know?

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Shanita Taylor BSIS, BSc (Psyc), M.A.E.LFebruary 14,2023 at 3:59AM UTC
If you work at an Executive Level, you should know this already. You are at an Executive Level, so start making executive-based decisions on how to deal with it effectively. No one can 100% tell you what to do or how to do it. I understand your frustration. You can either ignore it or take action. Depends on the environment. Sometimes when you ignore people, they go elsewhere or just shut up. You have to study your environment.
AnonymousFebruary 14,2023 at 4:14AM UTC
I have been at mine 3 years. I’m the odd man out in my area . It’s very toxic and very Hs. It’s rough dealing with and sometimes I cry about it.
linn hummelFebruary 16,2023 at 2:25PM UTC
I was sorry to read that your work situation makes you cry sometimes. Unfortunately, I think there are times that we have all cried (or at least wanted to) about an extremely taxing situation at work. I only hope that you'll remember that you are not the crazy one. If your situation allows, please start considering other options because a job is not supposed to be high school.
AnonymousFebruary 17,2023 at 4:22AM UTC
Thank you! And I am looking for other jobs. It’s sad because I used to love the job.
AnonymousFebruary 14,2023 at 6:01AM UTC
There’s a few signs you can tell the job isn’t right for you. Such as favoritism, did any co workers greet you your first day, how do people react to things there? Do you feel comfortable or not? If someone is making you uncomfortable try to gather evidence so that way you could say what happened later on.
AnonymousFebruary 14,2023 at 1:47PM UTC
If you need to ask this question then you have your answer. Don’t overthink it. You are at an executive level, it’s not your first rodeo.
AnonymousFebruary 15,2023 at 6:27PM UTC
Are you in position to get rid of any of the bad actors? If so, do so now. Document everything. Put the rest of the bad ones on notice that they will get fired if their bad behavior continues.
Crystal HowellFebruary 16,2023 at 10:58AM UTC
If you get along with your boss and asking her in confidence, why are the managers allowing petty gossip at the work place and give a solution , only if you like your job, if not, it happens everywhere.
AnonymousFebruary 16,2023 at 1:50PM UTC
By any chance, are your peers men? If so, then this may be a gender biased behavior that many men partake of in the business world, unfortunately. I have been dealing with this for several months now and am almost at the place of putting a name on this with my boss, who admires me and thinks I’m doing an excellent job. It’s an absolutely horrible place to be in and because this behavior exists everywhere (especially in IT), I haven’t decided whether I’m going to HR about it or just work towards acceptance of some men not wanting to put their big boy pants on and having an open and honest discussion about the issues. I was even told that if I were a man, these men would have talked to me a long time ago. Things that make you go hmmmmm.
AnonymousFebruary 16,2023 at 2:11PM UTC
Yes.
AnonymousFebruary 16,2023 at 4:57PM UTC
Culture is not about yogurt. If from the top down this is MO- modus operandi or BAU- business as usual, then its enough time. I would if it were me give feedback to your direct manager and let them know how much you appreciate them but that your concerns about the level of toxicity is not helping you to be your best self. See what they think about the same things, cite examples of specific situations - or one situation that particularly worried or concerned you. If they don't feel the same and cannot provide ways to get through without the emotional reaction you are having, it's time....find a place that can support the happy culture you seek.
Jan WilderFebruary 16,2023 at 7:57PM UTC
Yes. I was in a toxic environment for 2-3 months and I had to take medical leave for two weeks. I cried constantly and was so depressed. I finally ended up just leaving and another job came through for me.
AyianFebruary 16,2023 at 8:02PM UTC
The first time that grade school BS occurs and is not squashed is long enough to know. If people are allowed to behave this way once, they will continue doing so. The company tolerates and perhaps even encourages this behavior if it isn't immediately dealt with. So yes, 7 months is PLENTY of time. Best wishes on your next career step.
Bridget HarringtonFebruary 16,2023 at 9:17PM UTC
Absolutely this. My last company was in this model. Not only was it tolerated, but it was also condoned by management. When I raised the flag about it, my "manager" handled it by hosting a meeting with the problem person and I...as if it was a problem I participated in formulating (and as if the problem person were mature enough to handle their behavior in a meeting setting). As a former manager myself, that is NOT how you handle grade school BS. That was about 4 months in with that company and I foolishly stayed another 18 months. Never again. The second these problems are not dealt with appropriately is the second you leave/decide to look elsewhere. Companies aren't unlike relationships. Would you stay with a partner that hits you or would you leave after the first incident? Failure of management to address unprofessional behavior is the sign that they do not respect you...so the only sane solution is to take your skills where they are valued and respected. These organizations never change. That was almost 5 years ago and that company is still having problems retaining talented people.
AnonymousFebruary 17,2023 at 1:30AM UTC
This toxic work environment will never improve, unless the department is restructured. Fortunately, you haven’t invested a lot of time in this company. If I had your level of experience I would definitely move on. Good luck
Jocelyn LyonsFebruary 17,2023 at 11:10AM UTC
Yes, I think it’s been enough time to make a decision about your future there. When the drama exists within leadership, there are often times relatively no repercussions and the behavior usually trickles down and impacts the entire team or organization’s culture. Until leadership changes or is held accountable, things won’t get better. Good luck!