I keep running into workplace bullies, what should I do?
Anonymous
I keep running into workplace bullies, what should I do? I'm not sure the reason for this but after moving from the east coast to the west coast, I keep meeting bullies of different degrees at the companies I've worked in. That's not to say there aren't any office bullies in a NYC office, but I had always worked at companies and with people who were focused on the work and didn't spend time playing games with people. Ever since I've been working on the west coast I've experienced managers who withhold information, misdirection, micromanage, insult me in front of coworkers, talk over me in meetings, mock, make threats, take credit or give another team member credit for my work, sabotage my work and then step in to offer help, not respect my time, and other behaviors. The first time I encountered these behaviors I ended up confused and began questioning myself - eventually, my manager filed a report to terminate my employment for reasons they claim are my lack of skills to do my job. Now I'm more knowledgeable on how to identify bullying but I still am affected emotionally and mentally when it occurs. The most recent is at my current job. I began working 6 months ago at a new company and on my first week, I identified my project manager as trouble. Honestly, I don't know what made her decide to target me since I was a new hire and I literally haven't done anything at work yet. Sure enough, she assigned me a task to do and afterward informed me it wasn't what she wanted. She talked over me during a team meeting, not allowing me to voice my views. In all of her team meetings, no one speaks unless she addresses them to do so. I documented her actions and informed my direct managers, asking them for advice on how to handle this type of project manager plus my workload. I didn't really receive much advice, just that everyone is busy. I tried to find a way to build a connection with her, thinking she just needed to know she could trust me, but that didn't work. Instead, she got more emboldened in how she treated me. She took away responsibilities and controlled the little bit of work I did receive but had my work in circles. She is bad in time management and it's common to be working non stop, through the weekend and up until minutes before a meeting. She would disregard my work schedule and schedule "important" meetings at the same time as my other project meetings. I know she treats others badly but for whatever reason, she seems to enjoy giving me a hard time. One example, at the end of a client meeting, a few people were waiting for a car to pick them up. I offered to wait with them even though I wasn't using the car. This manager's response was "oh no, you don't need to wait with us. we're abandoning you". She will go from being kind and friendly to screwing up your work and finding it funny. Today it was announced that she was leaving for another job. No one in the meeting reacted or responded to the news - which I didn't find surprising. But I'm ready to not just quit this job but the industry that I work in (architecture).


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