Hello, I have just accepted a new management position and I'm very excited, but nervous about one thing.

Anonymous

March 10,2022 at 11:05PM UTC

Welcome to Fairygodboss!

We’re the largest online career community helping women achieve their career goals. Gain access to articles, jobs, events, and a supportive network of women and allies. Membership is free, always.

Hello, I have just accepted a new management position and I'm very excited, but nervous about one thing. All of my 7 interviews with this company were virtual, and I did not reveal that I was pregnant. Two reasons.... 1. My family status/pregnancy is not relevant to the job and should not affect their hiring decision. 2. I didn't want to offer any personal information in the pre-employment phase that could be used to discriminate against me. 3. I was in my first trimester (10 weeks) and no one knew I was pregnant, not even my current employer. Now, I have gone through all the preliminaries and onboarding, and I will be 16 weeks on my start date, which means I'm in my fourth month. I am showing now and I do plan to take maternity leave in September when the baby comes. What is the best way to share the news with my director (who is a woman and a mother, herself)? And could this potentially be frowned upon because I didn't mention the pregnancy when I was interviewing?

Why women love us:

Daily articles on career topics
Jobs at companies dedicated to hiring more women
Advice and support from an authentic community
Events that help you level up in your career
Free membership, always

10 comments

Share your insight

Join an authentic community that helps women support each other at work. Share your professional experience or ask for advice — you can even post anonymously.

10 Comments

Join the conversation

AnonymousMarch 11,2022 at 1:56AM UTC
I would give it a couple of weeks and then request a meeting with your supervisor. Share your news and also your plans (to the extent you know them). Reassure her that you’re committed to the position and will be proactive about making arrangements for leave. That’s it! Nothing to worry about. Congratulations!
Lorna Rose, J.D., M.S.March 11,2022 at 1:58AM UTC
Seven interviews over a month and a half, they better not have anything to say about it! Of course it can potentially be frowned upon, not so much because you didn't mention while interviewing but because it just is. You can't prevent or change that so don't worry about trying to.
The best way to share the news with your director is to show up to work and let the news announce itself. If your being pregnant isn't relevant to the job then there's no reason to make a special conversation out of it. When you're ready to put in for maternity leave, follow the company procedure for it.
If your director or anybody brings it up and expresses surprise over it, you can always say something like "What can I say, I've been doing some baking these past few months" and then either change the subject with a work-related question or keep the conversation going if you feel comfortable doing so.
One word of caution: just because your new director is a woman and a mother doesn't mean that you two will share the same feelings and beliefs about things. She could be super helpful and excited for you, or she could have a totally different perspective on being a working mom that doesn't vibe well with you. Since this is your new job, I would recommend approaching any personal topics conservatively until it feels right to open up more.
AnonymousMarch 12,2022 at 8:08PM UTC
Thank you for the advice.
And it was 7 interviews over a one week period. lol The month and a half refers to the whole interview process, screening and onboarding.
Lorna Rose, J.D., M.S.March 13,2022 at 2:23PM UTC
Ahhh ok, gotcha! My head is now spinning over seven interviews in one week, but that’s neither here nor there at this point lol and of course CONGRATS on your growing family!! So sorry I left that out in the original post
AnonymousMarch 14,2022 at 6:05PM UTC
Thank you!
And yes, my head was spinning too! And my back went out the morning of the 7th interview. I wiped my tears and had my husband pick me up and put me at my desk. Sitting there in excruciating pain, I did my hair and makeup and logged on to the interview as if all was well. haha I had come too far to let my back keep me from getting that job offer. I just knew it was mine. I completed the interview and watched my inbox for that job offer! It came the next business day, as expected. I was so happy and thankful to God!!
Sarah Cleveland, SPHR, ACCMarch 11,2022 at 1:57PM UTC
Remember that you did not have to reveal that you are pregnant during the interview process.
Once you are settled into your role, have a 1:1 meeting with your manager and let them know your news in a matter of fact way (no need to apologize - you have not done anything wrong!) and that you’ll need to work with the Benefits Team as you request leave when you have your baby. Remember also that people need to take Leaves for all kinds of things - pregnancy / having a baby is just one of the many reasons. Review the FMLA information so you are informed ahead of your meeting. Your Benefits Team / HR Representative will be able to share the full details on if / what you are eligible for and how to formally request the Leave. Being pregnant is a protected class, so knowing some info ahead of the meeting will be advantageous for you - search for (I can’t seem to paste the link here): FMLA department of labor. Some states have different details. Sometimes you do have to be employed for at least one year to qualify, but you cannot be fired for being pregnant / taking the necessary leave when you have your baby.
This is an exciting time for you, Congratulations!
AnonymousMarch 12,2022 at 8:09PM UTC
Thank you!
This is sound advice. :)
AnonymousMarch 14,2022 at 2:56PM UTC
I agree your pregnancy and promotion are not entwined,
Also most people don't announce until +12 weeks when baby is considered viable :)
Head up high and congratulations!
Taylor HenrieMarch 14,2022 at 8:28PM UTC
You had zero obligation to mention this during your interview process, so please don't worry or stress about telling your manager. I would share the news face to face in a 1x1 and share it how you would to anyone else! That you have some exciting news- you are pregnant and can't wait to embark on this journey! Then share your due date to coordinate on coverage for when you are out. Good luck!
Crystal HowellMarch 17,2022 at 12:27PM UTC
I don't think it matters, they didn't ask and can't, so you should be in the clear. Life happens! Check with your boss, and meet with HR. Let us know how it pans out for future women with the same concern.