Guurrrl, I HEAR you.
I just went through this last week. The worst interviews are the ones where, as you stated, the interviewers just want to drag it out, but at YOUR expense, and on YOUR dime ( for the gas or commute to the location) I find it infuriating ,I'm Right there with you.
To be honest though, I now see these rejections as blessings in disguise , because a lot of these gigs just wouldn't have suited me, you could be dodging a bullet in the form of a super dysfunctional compamny, or getting stuck in a place where you won't get compensated or have opportunities for growth. Some places just interview people to say they are interviewing to aquire funding, or to get a pool to see what kind of candidates will accept their sometimes lousy offer. maybe this is the time for your to pursue that thing you've been thinking about but haven't yet,. maybe something else is on the way, and that gig would just have gotten in the way of the better thing for you.
When iI start to feel very down and out,
For me, I do some basic cognitive behavior therapy. I tell myself there could have been a million reasons I didn't land it, that it might not even have anything to do with my personality, fit, experience., etc...and I KNOW my experience and skill, and I know the value I would bring, so in the end, if they don't see it, it' is their loss. Positive self talk, lol.
To relate more, yes, it's very draining and de moralizing, and disappointing that a employer would treat us this way.
I would say, but not advise, to try to keep a routine of really uplifting happy things to do that bring meaning, right around the time you finish an interview or get that dreaded no, because it's the worst feeling like we have no control over a situation, especially when the outcome of the interview determines our salary how we pay our bills. I know it's frustrating.
Getting support,doing good self care is so so vital. Getting drunk ( only every once in awhile, of course, lol) do what you got to do to move those feelings along so you have the energy to keep trying. I hear you though, I really do. Cry, get mad, but don't let yourself feel defeated. It won't last. Everything changes, nothing is permanent, you will be ok.
Share your insight
Join an authentic community that helps women support each other at work. Share your professional experience or ask for advice — you can even post anonymously.
85 Comments
Join the conversation