Happy Friday! I am week 4 into a new job.

8 Comments

1. SPQJanuary 23,2026 at 4:49PM UTC

   First of all, I am so glad you acknowledge that you're hard worker but overly eager (I am that way too).

   It's a tough position to be in because if you do act, you'll may ruffle feathers and step on toes, even infringing on *their* boundaries. If you don't act, they may continue to not let you fully get up to speed. Either way, you may run into a gate keeping situation.

   People say they are overwhelmed because they truly are and they are so stressed they can't put things down or even break out of that pattern. They think it takes time to check your work, which, by all means they are in the right because you haven't established trust and credibility with your colleagues yet.

   The best advice I can offer is:

   1. Instead of trying to find work from your colleagues, make your mission to build rapport, build a good working relationship, build credibility. Which includes giving them space, but being gently supportive (perhaps in other ways). Dedicate your effort to bring the human they need, not the headcount.

   2. Make a list of things you'd like to "learn" (I know you know it, but be humble) each week and share it with your boss. Tell your manager the fastest way you learn is by doing the work. Let your boss help you with the situation by providing explicit instructions to "train" you.

2. AnonymousJanuary 23,2026 at 5:19PM UTC

   SPQ - thank you for your thoughtful response! It is appreciated!

   A couple of follow up notes, my manger is so hands off. I think I’ve been face to face 3 times in 4 weeks. I was told I’d get a training schedule as I need to learn their ways and erp system. I have not gotten one. I will not ask again simply because I don’t want to haunt them. I have been poking around the erp to find tips and tricks but one can only do that so much of the day. I am self aware enough to put my ego aside and not come in crashing like a bull esp with the limited people who have trained me.

   I can say that I’ve been told I fit in with the team thus far. My sense of humor jives with others. And I am really good at reading people and knowing my audience. I hate to be that Gen X person but the VP is quite a bit younger than me and just goes with the flow. Nothing to see here unless other departments get involved. The work I have seen and dept goals for the year are at such a slower pace than I’m used to…I think I have PTSD from my last job lol. I can totally do this job so maybe I should be thankful I didn’t jump into another bees nest ??‍♀️

3. SPQJanuary 25,2026 at 12:46AM UTC

   Yes, perhaps you continuing in hyperdrive is carry-over of PTSD. Be thankful you have time to breathe deeply now.

   I had been running on fumes for so long that I didn't know what to do with myself when I finally landed in a place with real work-life balance. One time, I didn't even take time off from one job to the next. I left on a Friday and started on a Monday. How silly of me to put myself last and put my work and company first.

   My body and mental capacity for chaos finally gave up on me. I definitely had PTSD, weight gain, body aches, and Depression. But then, I started walking more and exercising during my day (I work remote) and going to yoga at night. I can't tell you how much I am in touch with the person I ought to have been years ago. I feel connected, not only to my work, but also the people around me. I let go of my identity as a "high performer" and reconnected with being a good, imperfect human being.

   Take this job as the universe telling you, slow down and enjoy a new pace of life. Even if it feels unnatural right now.

   You're good and everything is exactly how it should be.

4. AnonymousJanuary 25,2026 at 5:36PM UTC

   SPQ - thanks again for the sage advice ❤️ friends have told me to take a breath and realize this may be my reward for the hard work and toxic environment was was accustomed to working in. I want to perform well, but I don’t want to run at breakneck speed anymore. I’m ambitious but old and tired lol.

5. AnonymousJanuary 23,2026 at 5:44PM UTC

   As someone in a similar situation, I am 30 years into my career, have a lot of horsepower and badnwidth on a lot of days... I have been working to allow myself to enjoy the ride.

   I am a "doer" so taking a 30 minute lunch feels like an indulgence I rarely let myself enjoy in the past.

   A wise person helped me to understand that because of my experience, the expertise I have created in my field I am able to get things done at a faster clip... Something that10 years ago may have taken 2 hours, now takes 30 minutes.

   I am trying to allow myself the opportunity to learn new things by taking courses offered by my company (AI use, etc.) that I would have never done even 5 years ago.

   You'll get back to racing speed, but hoping you can learn to enjoy the paddock stroll like I have.

6. AnonymousJanuary 23,2026 at 7:40PM UTC

   Great advice, Anonymous! It feels so foreign to me to “just stroll”. Strolling is usually viewed as being nonproductive and replaceable. But at this point, I’ll give it a ride :)

7. Elizabeth Stiles WestJanuary 24,2026 at 2:56AM UTC

   Congratulations on the position!!! If you have downtime, you could use it earning mini-credentials on Linked In or simply going through tutorials on any kind of relevant technology that you aren't yet an expert on. Being generally helpful and doing things like offering to cover the phones for a few minutes so the receptionist can take a break would likely be appreciated. However, don't push too hard with the helpfulness; someone will come and get you if they need you. If you're given a few minutes just to breathe, enjoy it. Get a cup of coffee or a soft drink and relax.

8. Steven MockNovember 7,2026 at 7:51AM UTC

   That pent-up racehorse feeling is so familiar — and the fact that you're catching it in week 4 is actually a good sign. One thing that helped me in a similar lull: instead of asking every day what I could do, I asked my manager for one small thing I could own end to end, with a clear finish line, and a short weekly check-in to review priorities. It gave me something real to work on without stepping on anyone's toes or doing work faster than the team could absorb it. I'd also keep a running list of the process gaps and questions you're noticing while you have fresh eyes — that list is gold once you're up to speed, and it keeps the waiting from feeling wasted. And you're right to protect the boundaries you set coming in — it's much easier to hold them now than to claw them back later.