Trying to pick myself up after a botched interview.

12 Comments

1. Kathy DonnaldDecember 22,2025 at 9:48PM UTC

   Same here. It is difficult to act as though you have confidence in yourself after being put down by coworkers. Mine is 25 years, I guess I was to hard working and apparently smarter at work. (Maybe not about how badly you can treat a coworker and get by with it.).

   I always treated my employees the way I would like to be treated?

2. AnonymousDecember 23,2025 at 8:20PM UTC

   There are so many people out there who thrive on putting others down in order to lift themselves up. You are most definitely not alone!

3. AnonymousDecember 22,2025 at 10:12PM UTC

   You have to believe in yourself, your skills, your strengths and what you can bring to the company. Remember..... there is a lot of competition out there. The company has to know why they should hire you, instead of the other candidates. What makes you special? How can you help them? What works for me .....is to have confidence and believe that you are enough and you can conquer anything, no matter how hard it may seem with God's help. Use positive affirmations in your daily life. Practice interviewing, learn about the company, have your questions ready. Hold your head up and speak confidently....they don't know...what you don't know. Think before you speak. Take your time and breathe. This is how I get through my interviews. I also pray, pray and pray. I try not to focus on when things don't go the way I would like it to. I NEVER use the word "fail".....EVER. If I didn't get the job, I'll say oh well, that means God has something else better for me. I'm not perfect and I try to learn from my mistakes and move on. As Bishop TD Jakes said "you can't drive your car, looking in the rear view mirror". I wish you the best.

4. AnonymousDecember 23,2025 at 12:13AM UTC

   Consider today a learning experience. That employer does NOT get to determine your worth, and it's no great loss because you currently have a job already and you could tell that the employer you visited today was not a good fit.

   Think about what questions they asked and how you could have answered better, have a supportive friend or family member practice interviewing with you between now and next week, Practice your response to a variety of common interview questions, research the employer you will visit next week and make sure your answers make it clear that you are the person they should hire. Also go in looking your confident best; treat yourself to a subtle manicure this week, get a haircut if you're due for one, or touch up your roots if you color your hair and it has been a few weeks. Choose your best professional ensemble to wear to the interview and walk with your head held high.

   Also be prepared to respond if the company you interviewed with today calls back with an offer; sometimes when we think we bombed something, we really didn't! In any case, you are a worthy person, you write well, and you've got this! Relax and enjoy the holiday if you get any time off for Christmas and go in ready to ace the interview next week.

5. AnonymousDecember 23,2025 at 9:15AM UTC

   You realize the truth is you are sabotaging yourself. Now realize that only you can put yourself back on track as a confident, capable talent with so much to offer. Focus on your successes only. Remember times you shined and how that felt. Picture yourself in various scenarios where your skill and talents were exactly what is required, where you are exactly the right person to meet the needs of the company. You are getting interviews in a horrible market so clearly you are a gifted candidate. Now focus on those gifts.

6. AnonymousDecember 23,2025 at 8:14PM UTC

   Thank you! I must remember that only I can define who I am. I have been working under a manager who regularly makes a point to diminish me and it has worn me down alot, whereas in the beginning I felt much stronger. It takes strength to look past the people who try to degrade another person's confidence because of their own issues. It is hard sometimes to remember that it is their problem and not mine. I am studying the new company for next week and fortunately they gave me several links to read up on before the interview, so I have good information to work with. I am taking what I learned from this last interview and am focusing on my skills.

7. AnonymousDecember 24,2025 at 2:26AM UTC

   The very best to you.

8. Barb HansenDecember 23,2025 at 1:27PM UTC

   You already said what you need to focus on --- "I can already tell that I would not mesh with the culture there."

   I would guess that this "failed" interview was a them-problem, not a you-problem.

   Focus on that and go smash your next interview! :)

9. AnonymousDecember 23,2025 at 8:19PM UTC

   Yes indeed it is!! Thank you for acknowledging this! It is not always as simple as "just believing in yourself." I have been in this terrible work environment for 2 years now and it is really wearing me down. Every single day I have to pick myself up from my manager's personal insults and passive aggression, because she does not want me to advance with this company, and she does not want others to see my capabilities. She tells me she will not cross train me and that she can't give me more work because I "have enough" even though I have surpassed expectation and have time and time again asked for me challenging work. In the beginning I knew my skills, but now I still know my skills but they are no longer being utilized. I just need to get out of here and I am going to work very hard on this next interview with hope.

10. AnonymousDecember 26,2025 at 5:37PM UTC

    Best way is to write out to the best of your recollection the questions you were asked, and if you can your responses. Create a new narrative also in writing as to how you could have done differently. In the product management world we call that a post mortem. AKA what could I have done better or differently to have a different outcome. Use that information to compartmentalize the outcome and do better next time. Failure can often help you to succeed if you take the details to heart and make changes to effect a different state at the end. After this exercise, release yourself from the miss and go head first into the next interview with confidence that you can do this! As for culture remember to ask some questions about how culture works in the new place. One good questions is about how often meetings happen companywide, and how conflict is handled when business goals and employees don't align. Remember they are buying you and you them. Perhaps a bullet dodged could be the way to look at the one that got away....Good luck, you got this sister!

11. AnonymousDecember 27,2025 at 12:48PM UTC

    Great advice. Thank you. I have written out a lot of interview questions and wrote out thoughtful responses for the future. I am hoping that this upcoming interview next week turns out to be good.

12. Sherice StewartDecember 30,2025 at 12:28AM UTC

    You landed one interview and have another interview lined up! That's saying a lot! Most companies would not invest their time in doing the interview with you if they didn't see you as a quality candidate - you could have been quietly pushed to the bottom of the pile and not even gotten a response.

    Next pivot - from what I'm reading, it sounds like your current job has done a number on your confidence to make you doubt yourself. But you are taking huge steps to get yourself out of that predicament which is great! Add resilience and tenacity to your confidence building list. Some people stay at dead end jobs regardless of how they are treated for fear of not having a paycheck. But not you! :) You are investing time and energy applying for new positions and doing interviews, that takes a lot of courage!

    Being honest and transparent (with yourself and perfect strangers) about your journey is another superpower that you overlooked, sometimes it takes another perspective from someone else to show you the goodness that's already in you.

    Take a look at your resume and look at all the key things you've accomplished in your career, what you learned and how all of these experiences created the amazing, resilient person you are now, the confidence will clearly show up. I hope this helps you.