Hi all!

Anonymous

February 26,2024 at 1:55PM UTC

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Hi all!

I have been working for this company now almost 5 months. I absolutely hate it. Now I have even more of a reason to as the management team and other higher ups are some of the most immature, petty and toxic individuals I've ever had the displeasure og having to work with.

I keep to myself, do my work, take the constructive feedback and turn it into a positive however, they've always got an issue.

My direct manager is the one who informed me an an issue where if you need to explain why you are away in Slack (I'm a cx associate so they feel the need to know every minor detail of your whereabouts all day) so if I state that I am away due to hand-holding a cx (as everyone also does) this particular person will tattletale to my Mgr, who took an issue w the person who told her this.

I plan to tell my Mgr during our 1:1 this week that I am unsure if I am making the right choice with my career at this job, due to the toxicity and child like behavior. (it'll be worded better but this is pretty much the idea) my boss tells me how I'm crushing stuff, so idk where the bs comes from. As I mentioned I do keep to myself and am I do exchange pleasantries, but I'm not interested in the rah rah of gerring to know these people. I'm 40 and they're all mostly in their 20s, so again I'm not their friend.

Am I wrong for sharing this w my Mgr? Should I approach it differently? I'm already seeking a new role, have been since I took this role. Just over the bs.

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AnonymousFebruary 26,2024 at 3:02PM UTC
You're not wrong but you need to be clear on your desired outcome. The "I'm not sure if I'm making the right choice...." might be received as more of a veiled threat. What does that even mean?
So I would be very clear about what you need to make this a good fit. Bring good examples where this job is not productive, where you feel micromanage. Etc. Also mention your contribution, metrics and the areas you excel at.
AnonymousFebruary 26,2024 at 4:25PM UTC
What do you hope to gain by sharing this information with your manager? If its a change in culture, that will not happen. I have worked for many years and I'm a firm believer that you know if the company is a right fit within the first 2 weeks.
I would not share this with your manager . Keep doing your job, stay out of the messiness and work on getting a new role. Good luck.
AnonymousFebruary 26,2024 at 4:31PM UTC
If you think your manager will come back and say: what can we do to keep you, we'll address these wrongs immediately...you will be sorely disappointed.
Few of us are that special that a supervisor will up-end a department for an individual contributor. Suffering is a choice so if you're really that unhappy, please start to aggressively look for another job.
If a direct report came to me and said "I'm not sure if I'm making the right choice" I'd immediately update their job description in anticipation of looking for their back-fill.
Yes, you are wrong for sharing this wishy-washy statement with your manager. As the other poster said, what's your desired outcome? You have the benefit of maturity since you pointed out everyone's young age (where is FGB boss squawking about ageist comments?!?!) so figure out a way to use your words appropriately and articulate what you'd like to see changed.
AnonymousFebruary 26,2024 at 4:58PM UTC
You state that you are away do to hand holding a cx and you don't understand why they would tattle about that? Even if everyone else does that, that sort of message cultivates an environment where people are afraid to ask for help because it is seen as inconveniencing those around them. That type of behavior is extremely toxic. If the management team is toxic and immature, then I'm sorry to say that so are you. I would not bring that up to my manager either. Being a manager, I'd let you go or prepare for you to walk away. I wouldn't fight to keep you if you're not a team player and view those types of responses appropriate.
AnonymousFebruary 26,2024 at 6:09PM UTC
Thanks for the advice! As I stated, the folks who work there do this so I followed suit. Nobody ever said these things should not be said.
I'm happily seeking a role elsewhere and certainly understand your point about not saying anything. I have nothing to say to anyone there going forward unless it's pleasantries. I'm quite the observer so I've realized since early on they tend to bend the lines of professionalism and play time which is why I keep my distance. I appreciate the feedback!
AnonymousFebruary 26,2024 at 6:21PM UTC
Leave. Now. If you hate it, try to apply for other jobs.
they make wrong policies about tattle inf instead of actually talking to people, the person, directly.
AnonymousFebruary 27,2024 at 6:13AM UTC
Ask yourself : what would I ideally accomplish from sharing this with my manager?
If you like the work and the company and want to stay but have issues with certain toxic people, then you can give solutions to the manager to consider.
If you don't like your work or the company and just want to vent, don't. It can backfire. It's best to start networking and applying to jobs now, while you're employed. Keep doing your best, try to ignore the annoying stuff, and focus on your next career move.
On another note, I was friends with plenty of people in their 40s when I was in my 20s because we had shared interests and respect for one another. It's not age, it's toxic personalities.
AnonymousFebruary 27,2024 at 6:24AM UTC
Also-- saying "this isn't the right choice for me" to your boss can set you up to be let go. If you wan't to be fired in order to collect unemployment benefits, that's another story.
If you come with solutions to your grievances, like "I want to be more productive and grow more in this role, but I'd like to ask for your support in addressing some workplace behaviors that are hindering me. Is there any way to address xx (give specific points, not just 'childish toxicity'), through conversations or perhaps some sort of empathetic communications training for the staff? As a leader at this company, are there any suggestions you have that might allow me to reach my career goals in a psychologically safe environment?"