Always questioned as a YOUNG woman of color in leadership.

23 Comments

1. AnonymousOctober 21,2023 at 5:48PM UTC

   Might be time to find a mentor to help you navigate your career path and deal with these challenges. I’d also take a look at your business resource groups.

2. AnonymousOctober 21,2023 at 7:41PM UTC

   I struggled with the perception of youth = inexperienced and even dumb.

   I loved their reaction as these people quickly realized I was a freaking queen and they fell all over themselves to work with me.

   I miss those days. Now I just get high expectations and little acknowledgement.

3. Sidney BristowOctober 22,2023 at 6:52AM UTC

   The good news is you may not have to face resistance everywhere. I have landed at a place as a woman of color in leadership that I do not feel the need (thankfully) to prove myself constantly or feel second-guessed. But I have been there in the past. In those instantes, I would get the microaggressions etc usually from lower-level employees who wondered why I was in my position. Hurts the same.

   Someone said do not dim your light to make someone else feel comfortable.

4. Rosa E HearnOctober 22,2023 at 1:52PM UTC

   At 18 & brown I started in a very traditional male dominated industry, where even the women undermined others to survive.
   I'm talking typical 50 year white men. Fast-forward over 30 years. I'm well respected in my profession but even till this day, I'm still talked down too, undermined by some. It has never stopped (grant it, lesser than many years before) and I don't think it will ever stop. People are People sometimes but the way I react to it, is what keeps me respected by the majority.

5. AnonymousOctober 22,2023 at 1:55PM UTC

   Probably because you’re a unicorn. Most people who are young don’t have it all together like that. And eventually it shows. They’re probably just waiting for the other shoe to drop. Rise above, ignore all that, do your stuff, and they’ll see that they’re wrong.

6. AnonymousOctober 22,2023 at 7:11PM UTC

   It has to do with both. I am an old woman of color, and I have been in this position

7. AnonymousOctober 23,2023 at 2:28PM UTC

   It is both. GRATEFUL that you're confirming that it is both. To the OP: Don't let anyone gaslight you.

8. AnonymousOctober 22,2023 at 11:53PM UTC

   Please don't take offense to this, but women of color often look much younger than they are, especially to us "White privileged folks." I had a woman who worked for me that I swore had to be in her twenties when she had a child in his twenties, so part of it could be the ingrained bias there is for POC (especially women) and the "age" factor stemming from the fact that you probably appear to be much younger than you are. Hang in there, stand your ground when challenged, and please, NEVER believe you are anything less than you are. Just because others question your abilities doesn't mean you need to. Show them you can be the last one still standing in any challenge. I believe you can do it.

9. Lorraine HerreraOctober 23,2023 at 12:50PM UTC

   I work in STEM, thankfully most of the women I’ve meet in my profession have been supportive. I can remember just one that was condescending. However from the male employees I can’t say the same. I went for one of the least common specializations in my profession, I started working part time on this since I was in my second year of college, so technically I learned it at work before even taking the classes corresponding to my specialization and I’ve worked in the same area for 15 years after graduation. I don’t think I know it all, but I’m sure very specialized and continue learning. I’ve had young male, coworkers that work in other areas of the project, not even in my speciality, coming to ask me if I’m sure my work is right? If I say yes, they start questioning my process and why I chose this or that other thing and if maybe I didn’t considered the other option. I’m not saying curious questions or in an interest of learning from a person with more experience, is evident that is done in a condescending way and doubting my capacity. It has definitely happen more since I moved to mainland US, because not only I’m a woman in this area, look different, but also have an accent and for some reason that seems to mean less intelligence to them. That is totally ironic because it only means I can speak two languages and I can do complex stuff in my second language, but the stigma is still strong.

10. AnonymousOctober 23,2023 at 1:05PM UTC

    If you've moved into the leadership track, no matter where you go you are always going to run into other managers who feel the need to be "the smartest person in the room." Embrace your talent and power and use your voice to hold your own. You've got this!

11. Leader135412October 23,2023 at 1:18PM UTC

    I have come to the conclusion that as a female, your decisions will always be challenged by someone. Male or female. I've gotten so used to being treated this way, I always have the information readily available to those who feel the need to fact check. And I will ask them straight up if they feel I'm not qualified enough in their eyes for my position. Yes or No. Be direct, don't waiver, and keep eye contact the whole time.

12. AnonymousOctober 23,2023 at 2:17PM UTC

    You are lucky to have discovered this at a young age. As a woman of color who was once on a leadership path, I allowed the mistreatment to shatter my spirit, and now, in my 50s, I am tired of the nonsense and unemployed. Back then, there were no resources like this available. I thought it was just me.
    Stay strong, take the advice of Leader135412 and the others here, and continue to persevere. You have the power to make a difference.

13. AnonymousOctober 23,2023 at 5:16PM UTC

    Be the change! You have to teach people how you need to be viewed and respected and cannot allow others ignorance of POC in leadership to taint your power. Be the powerful woman that got you into that role and lead by example! You got this!

14. Lorraine HerreraOctober 23,2023 at 6:30PM UTC

    Is definitely both. Also she should dress however she feels best. She should talk and express herself exactly how she is. Nobody expects men to change how they talk or their whole persona to be respected at work. Some men have horrible communication at work, but if a woman has the audacity to at least be assertive, is being insubordinate. We should not keep imposing this in the new generations, we don’t have to decorate everything we say at work, just be sure is respectful. If OP sounds youthful because she is young and someone feel threatened by her youth and early success, that is their insecurity and problem to deal with, not hers.

15. Lila HewettOctober 25,2023 at 5:02PM UTC

    Yes! This ^^!!

16. Tami CannizzaroOctober 23,2023 at 8:33PM UTC

    There could be so many reasons for this, including age, gender. skin color. Whatever it is, continue to be the smart person you are, hold your head high and do your job. It's happened to all of us, in one way or another; I could tell you stories of things that happened to me that would make your skin crawl. I learned early on - as you are - the best way to move ahead was to know my stuff and always remain confident. In my case, I'm sad to say, the worst treatment I've received has been from other women.

17. AnonymousOctober 24,2023 at 12:41PM UTC

    That never changes. I'm a white woman over 40 and have had the same experience.

18. AnonymousOctober 24,2023 at 6:09PM UTC

    You are correct. I am a black woman over 50 and it is always worse for us

19. AnonymousOctober 24,2023 at 6:29PM UTC

    Probably similar, but definitely not the same.

20. AnonymousOctober 30,2023 at 12:42PM UTC

    Not to step on your pity party, but I'm an Asian middle-aged woman and have had all manner of racist issues directed toward me. I have two caucasian colleges that receive so much vitriol that is allowed under the guise of "inclusion" that one of them sued and won a substantial amount of money. The other is currently negotiating a settlement for the same thing.

21. Afo Ogbeyalu KaluOctober 24,2023 at 1:15PM UTC

    Congratulations on your successes!

    The advice I typically give my clients is to remain professional, thorough, and assertive in your communication style. If an individual questions a statement you've shared with the individual, or in a group setting, give direct eye contact, and restate your position. Add an example, or data point to further clarify your point if necessary.

    If you are challenged by a colleague, cohort, or subordinate, be timely and direct in your response or follow-up. Thank that person for their input/for their contributions (even if the input is off-base), and restate why you stated your position in the way in which you did. If there is continued pushback, request that the person send you a report with supporting facts/documentation, so that you and/or the team can be better informed on their position.

    Follow-up these types of communication in an email, and copy all relevant parties.

    When individuals understand that you are the consummate professional: direct, timely in your responses, thorough, and results-focused, they are less likely to challenge (mess with) you.

22. Shelby COctober 24,2023 at 1:52PM UTC

    The best places to find value and appreciation is through yourself. It's still nice to be validated by friendly peers and co-workers though, isn't it? Bottom line? If you weren't valued and appreciated, you wouldn't have the job.

    When I stepped into Corporate America, I thought that I had time warped back into junior high. I even remember my boss and mentor warning me during my interview that I should be cautious. At the time, I thought that was rather close-minded and sexist; however, I discovered how fortuitous that statement was within weeks.

    I did notice that certain company cultures allowed it more than others. Some almost seemed to encourage it.

    I took every chance I could to bring us together as a team and it helped. A popular one was our book clubs and if it pertained to the company's mission in some way, I would persuade President to cover the cost of the book and teacher's guide (when applicable). A lot more people come when the food is free.

23. AnonymousOctober 24,2023 at 6:28PM UTC

    Welcome to corporate america. Do not look to a position or job to define who you are. You will always be disappointed.

    Only you can do that.