Need a little advice?

47 Comments

1. Mary PoolAugust 15,2023 at 10:06PM UTC

   You have a boss, the owners, and the owners have spoken. Your choice now is to find another position or make morning arrangements for your child or accommodate all employees, not just the children of the owners. Find a solution that works for everyone, that would be the best solution. If it is a matter of office staffing, I know many high school students who would love a bit of extra income by answering phones for an hour each morning.

2. MislynAugust 19,2023 at 6:32PM UTC

   My solution would be to find a work from home job but I’m not finding that to be easy. That is my overall goal. Something where I can set my own hours. Being a single mother is very hard and it takes flexibility.

3. AnonymousAugust 22,2023 at 7:27PM UTC

   Good luck with that. Maybe find that new job before you ruin this one for yourself. I know single moms that manage everything. Probably not as hard as you make it out to be. Maybe your parents can take your kids to school while your running their business.

4. MislynSeptember 8,2023 at 3:07PM UTC

   Ruin this one for myself? What is that supposed to mean? They know I do a great job any work and they know I know the business. I have ran many offices and I have always been great at my jobs thank you.

5. Erin VegaAugust 16,2023 at 1:21AM UTC

   You are not the boss, you are a manager and one that feels they are entitled because mommy and daddy own the company.

   Since your parents have made it clear that it would be unfair to the other employees this is where you could step up to being a manager and come up with a solution to present to your parents that would be fair to everyone in the company and your customers.

   Hint, Hint, Wink, Wink - Start by reaching out to the other employees and speak with them.

   The qualities of a good manager are not getting what you can get out of the company but managing your team is lifting them up and showing the owners of the company see that you have what it takes to be a manager.

6. MislynAugust 18,2023 at 2:04AM UTC

   I run the company from top to bottom I am what everyone calls the boss. They come to me for everything Time off, sick time you name it! I have a manager below me. Just because “I” don’t own the business doesn’t mean I’m not their boss.

7. Erin VegaAugust 19,2023 at 5:02AM UTC

   I would love for your parents to respond to your post and see what they have to say. Do your parents consider you the boss? Have they told you and the company that you are the boss? I commend you and think you have shown a lot of initiative by steppng up and taking on so many rolls to help out the company that you work for. It definitely shows you are a great employee and want the company to succeed.

   But I also think your parentes are doing a great thing by making you step up to the plate of taking care of your responsiblities and treating you as an employee. They are teaching you so many valuable lessons but at this moment in time you do not see. But if you could move away from feeling entitled because your parents own the company those valueable lessons will only help you in the long run.

   You didn't just find out that you were returning to school so you have had a while to figure out what you were going to do. Now it has come down to the wire and your parents didn't roll over and give you what you think you are entitled to.

   You could also look at it another way as well. Look at it from a different company that you work for not owned by your parents. Would you expect them to allow you to be later? Would you call yourself the boss because you run the company from top to bottom?

8. MislynAugust 19,2023 at 6:26PM UTC

   I left a job I ran from top to bottom to work for my family due to lack of respect from my boss. I feel I respect all my employees and I do what I feel is best for them. The other employee never said they need to take their child to school that was my parents. When I said “I have to come in late in the mornings due to the other girls not being able to take the youngest to school” she said that’s not fair to the other employees that have kids they need to make arrangements for their children to get to school. That is how this started. I told her no one has ever mentioned it so why is it an issue. That’s how the conversation went. I’m not disrespecting any other employees. I’m doing what I need to do in order to keep working at this job and helping my parents out. I feel they need to accommodate me a little better if they need my help. I have had jobs in the past that are very accommodating and I’ve had some that were not accommodating at all. My mother knew I left my last job for that exact reason and she encouraged me to leave because His family was important mine was not. My family and friends all saw what I went through at my last job. Now it’s an issue here. I have cooled down and talked to her but when something is not an issue at first then suddenly becomes an issue that’s where I question it.

9. Erin VegaAugust 19,2023 at 10:55PM UTC

   In this case I believe the owners (mother) are trying to teach you a lesson. I know you may not see it as a lesson now. But parents have a way of teaching us valuable lessons. I get it, really get it, I was a single mother of four children years ago and I know that if I hadn't had the employer I did at the time it would have caused me so much havoc. So let's see what solutions you can provide the owners to present them as a contributing employee instead of someone who feels they are entitled to privileges because the owners are their parents.

   Some questions to make solutions for could possibly be the following:

   How late will you be? Will you also need to leave early to pick up? What happens when your child is sick?

   (I had just started working as a temp for a yacht builder as a single mother of four, 2 in school and 2 in daycare. Word got out to one of the VP's who truly intimidated me, that I was a single mother with four children and he immediately wrote me off as even coming close to a permanent employee due to the fact that I was a single mother with four kids. I showed him and all upper management as I was one of the most reliable temp's they had ever had. Originally I was cursed as after three weeks on the job, three of my kids came home with spots. Yep dreaded chicken pox, good thing is they had them at the same time bad news was as soon as I called my rep, she told me the company didn't want me back, devastated for a whole 15 minutes when my supervisor at the company called me and said not to worry just to come back as quickly as I could. I was hired on permanently nine months later. When the intimidating VP retired, I was the only person in the accounting dept. he personnally thanked for my outstanding work ethics, and told me he hadn't really expected me to last as long as I did because of my kids. I never missed a day of work with a two hour drive daily.)

   I think you need to take a moment and write down/make note of different scenarios that could happen and what your plan of action would be. Then you ask for a quick meeting with the owners. One thing would be to mention just what you typed above about the reason you joined the company and that originally it was not an issue however, now that it will be happening there is an issue and present your solutions to what you wrote down. This is you as an employee presenting the issue and the solutions in a business atmosphere. Not only will this show the owners your maturity, reliability, and that you know how to conduct yourself in a professional manner. Keep emotions out of the conversation and remain calm as you present your solutions.

   But please quit thinking you are the boss and that you should get privileges.

10. MislynSeptember 4,2023 at 4:31PM UTC

    I evaluate every situation and make my decisions based on the situation. I keep my emotions out of things totally. I look at things from my view and theirs so I don’t know how this turned into me being unreasonable. Did you guys even read my post?

11. AnonymousSeptember 6,2023 at 4:41PM UTC

    I believe everyone that has commented read the original post. You are being unreasonable and yes very selfish or maybe for a better word entitled. I would say with your immature attitude and outright snarly comments your parents ought to evaluate their decision on making you the BOSS. What would they even think if they read your post and comments? You mentioned past employment not being good as well where you ran the company. Sounds to me like you need to step away from management positions or better yet start your own company and see how long you stay in business. Your post come across as very defensive and rude. You asked for advice and that’s what you are getting. Unbiased advice from people you don’t know you or your company.

12. Kathryn MAugust 20,2023 at 10:55PM UTC

    Doesn’t the school have morning daycare so parents can get to work on time? I am a single parent and the school daycare opens at 6am. My employment situation is very similar to yours and I would never have the expectations you do. There is a difference between needing to routinely start late and needing a late start due an unexpected event (illness). I agree with your mother. By the way, in this situation she is your employer not your mother.

13. AnonymousAugust 22,2023 at 12:30PM UTC

    What would you do if an employee came to you in the exact same predicament as you? Tell her no or work it out?

14. Penni ParkerAugust 22,2023 at 12:26PM UTC

    You are being extremely selfish. How do you know that employee can count one some to take their child to school. You need to act like a good boss not a dictator

15. MislynSeptember 4,2023 at 4:26PM UTC

    I’m not being selfish. If they want to take the time off and not get paid that should be there choice as long as work gets done.

16. Cindy GrossAugust 22,2023 at 6:07PM UTC

    If you have a manager below you, why would anyone who reports to that manager come to you for time off or anything else? Delegation shows that you trust the people you work with - when you make everyone come to you, you are undermining everyone else.

17. MislynSeptember 4,2023 at 4:25PM UTC

    That is untrue. You delegate task and jobs not allowing them to let others take off or request time off. That comes from the boss or owners. Not the managers.

18. Barbara ThompsonAugust 16,2023 at 1:46PM UTC

    Wouldn’t this be an amazing opportunity to bring the company and the owners up to speed with making it an appealing place for working parents responsible for getting children to school to work? Maybe get a little press for the company because of the changes made?

19. MislynAugust 18,2023 at 2:07AM UTC

    Yes it would be but some owners just don’t see it that way. Family or not If it’s your only option in order to stay at that job everyone’s personal situations need to be taken into consideration.

20. Donna TingleAugust 16,2023 at 2:31PM UTC

    It isn't okay to take privileges that your employees don't receive. They won't understand and don't respect it.

21. MislynAugust 19,2023 at 6:29PM UTC

    Does your boss not have privileges you don’t have? Think about what you are saying for a minute and I bet your wrong.

22. Donna TingleAugust 19,2023 at 11:34PM UTC

    I am the boss. Trust me, you'll increase morale and productivity. Doing the right thing is a lot easier.

23. April LineAugust 16,2023 at 6:26PM UTC

    Why can't the other employee also start their day a little late?

24. MislynAugust 18,2023 at 2:00AM UTC

    Hey can’t because they need the hours. They need to work 8-4 to get their hours in. Plus they have someone else at home that can step up on the school transportation and I do not. I have kids that go to different schools and some have morning practices therefore they can not drive their little sister to school.

25. AnonymousAugust 18,2023 at 6:26PM UTC

    Figure out a way for them to make up that time...

26. AnonymousAugust 18,2023 at 12:40PM UTC

    I have spent the majority of my career working in a family business and I can tell you that nothing makes employee morale take a dump faster than family members thinking that they have the right or entitlement to do things that other regular employees do not. As a family member working in the family business, it is your obligation to set an example for the other employees working there. That means that you follow the same rules that they follow. You don't get a pass because you are a boss or a family member. To me, that way of thinking is arrogant and misdirected.

27. AnonymousAugust 18,2023 at 6:25PM UTC

    If you are a parent and the employee is a parent as well why not make it easier for both of you? Do the right thing...yes you are being a bit unreasonable. Loosen up, children take time and often parents have limited flexibility while working and dropping children off for school. You will feel better and so will the employee.

28. Rebecca MillikenAugust 21,2023 at 12:59AM UTC

    I feel like from your responses to people you want someone to tell you that it's OK. Not many that I can see think it is. You are the boss and you can do whatever you want. And you can also deal with the backlash that will result from it.

    I have a vendor that's a family owned business. The parents built the business and their daughters took over. The daughters really don't get customer service and it shows. It's showing in a huge drop in sales.

    When you're the one who built the business, you learn stuff, like how customers and employees are supposed to be treated. You say everyone else doesn't need this special treatment for whatever reasons, but you don't really know that. You don't know what they have to juggle in their own lives to accommodate their children's schedule.

    Luckily, my last two jobs (one of them a big box and my current a family owned biz) were helpful with my need to come in later to bring my daughter to school. We worked out the hours issue.

    Do whatever you want, boss-lady. If you want to be truly respected as a boss, you need to empathize with your employees. If you don't care because, heck, you'll always have a job, right? Don't ask what you should do.

    Your folks ran the business before you. They know what they're talking about.

29. MislynAugust 30,2023 at 5:12PM UTC

    No not asking for someone to say it’s okay. I want opinions and possibly some different options I have t thought of. I don’t need anyone to agree and I don’t care who sees me as right or wrong.

30. Kristi Hoffman SpearSeptember 2,2023 at 2:03PM UTC

    My first thought to this comment from you, following 30+ opinions and suggestions, is to wonder why you even posted in the first place?

    You seem defensive, you haven’t taken any suggestions, and imo, it looks like you’re still going to do what you’re doing.

31. MislynSeptember 4,2023 at 2:32PM UTC

    Well most of the people commenting are not in a management position so they are speaking as and employee. Employees feel differently and have different views then owners and managers. I have read all post and have taken many into consideration. I’m doing what’s right and found another option for my child. Point was don’t hire me in allowing me to do one thing then next year change things up Like I said I left a horrible job situation to work for family. My family knew how bad my last boss was and how I was mentally affected by his treatment. I’m not saying they need to bend the rules for me because I want to be fair to all the employees. I see no issues with people coming in late or having things they need to take off for that was not my point. My point is don’t hire me in as the boss and not let me be the boss. I’ve ran company’s I know how to make a good company run successfully.

32. AnonymousSeptember 4,2023 at 4:21PM UTC

    Sounds like maybe your parents are rethinking their decision. I know from this post I would not want to be one of your employees. Sounds to me like you want everything that benefits yourself with no regard to others. That is not boss material. I’m sure your going to have a reply to this post so I may just sit and wait.

    I worked for someone a lot like you and it didn’t work out. You say your old employer was horrible and I’m guessing maybe they had to be to get you to understand how the real world works. Now your parents are showing you the same. Maybe you need to realize the common denominator.

33. MislynSeptember 8,2023 at 3:19PM UTC

    You know I have a reply because you are totally wrong about me. You don’t know me. I’m a very compassionate person with a loving heart and I’m great to my employees. I just don’t put up with lying cheating bosses that like to change the rules as they go. I stand by what I say. I simply said I was allowed to do one thing last year now this year it has changed. Asked for advice and now it’s all about me being a horrible boss. There is no common denominator I left my last job because I was not getting where I was told I would be. I was gaslighted and mentally abused. Made to feel nothing I did was good enough. I will not go through that again and I guess changing the rules last minute did set me off because that was always done at my last job. This feed is done and I will not be replying to the negativity.

34. AnonymousSeptember 14,2023 at 1:28PM UTC

    I see why you didn’t get where you wanted to be at your last job. They saw you for who you really are. Reading this post tells us all what type of person you are. Take my advice and grow up. Maturity will get you a long way. Your being awful defensive to the negativity which shows you know your in the wrong. Posting something on the tread is asking for opinions and negativity if they find it negative. Grow up!

35. Colleen HansonAugust 22,2023 at 2:46PM UTC

    Good bosses who run successful companies lead by example. You do not afford yourself a luxury that others do not receive; that is a surefire way to lose respect. I have seen many good strong companies go out of business after being handed over to an "entitled" family member.

36. MislynAugust 25,2023 at 11:40PM UTC

    Like I said my parents want me to be the boss but, they want to overstep my decisions.

37. AnonymousSeptember 6,2023 at 4:26PM UTC

    Ya I’m guessing they don’t feel your decisions are right for the company. From reading this post and your comments I would strongly agree.

38. Kristi Hoffman SpearAugust 22,2023 at 4:32PM UTC

    My husband and I owned two child care centers for almost 20 years. With a reputation for being the best. We never turned down an employee’s needs to manage our own. In fact, we were the first in the door and the last out! One year we canceled a three-week cross country vacation because other employees requested to take earned vacation time. One of the biggest privileges of being a boss is having the ability to make things work for your valued employees; I’d highly suggest that you start looking at your role in that manner. Best of luck with back-to-school!

39. Audrey KirschAugust 22,2023 at 5:24PM UTC

    You are the acting boss. Your parents own the business and can take over control at any time. You are also not a leader because leaders lead by example. I've worked for owners children before and the situation was not fair. They came and went whenever they wanted or didn't come in at all with everyone else left to make sure the company was running. I applaud your parents for wanting to be fair. I can understand how you feel but you should redefine your roll so that your child and school can be your priority. Being the boss can wait until you can fully commit to that.

40. Cindy GrossAugust 22,2023 at 6:08PM UTC

    What if you offer flexible time for everyone - clearly outline the minimum staffing needs for various times of day (considering that what you offer now may not be the only way to do it) and let them work it out as to who covers what.

41. MislynAugust 30,2023 at 5:10PM UTC

    Most employees like the hours. We work 7:30-4. They are great hours but a agree we need a little flexibility.

42. AnonymousAugust 22,2023 at 6:55PM UTC

    I feel like as the boss you should never ask your employees to do something you wouldn’t , you will create issues if you give yourself flexibility while those that have to work under you cannot have the same consideration I would not do it

43. AnonymousAugust 22,2023 at 7:22PM UTC

    Okay so you are the BOSS we all got that. imagine you work at another job and you go ask your boss for special treatment and they tell you no but someone else ask for the same thing you asked for and they say yes. Would you find that unfair? Think about what you post. Your parents have obviously realized you are not BOSS material and they are letting you know that to be a boss you have to be fair and considerate of all employees. You lead by example when your a real boss.

44. MislynAugust 25,2023 at 11:39PM UTC

    Trust me I’ve been there. Treated like a queen when he needed or wanted me then crap when I could do nothing for him. I’m in no way like that. I was raised to have respect and compassion for people.

45. AnonymousAugust 22,2023 at 10:57PM UTC

    So give the other employee flex as well. I don't know what kind of company this is, but that kind of zero flex guarantees they won't be employees for long.

46. AnonymousAugust 25,2023 at 12:11AM UTC

    I’m going to just put it out there and may hurt some feelings. You definitely come across as a control freak and having you as a boss sounds like a nightmare. Listen to you parents they are the owners of the business for a reason. Any business you would own would go under in a heartbeat. Stay humble, and treat people right. That’s what it takes to run a successful business. Not sure of your age, I’m guessing early 20’s but must be wrong because your talking about your kids driving . Wow just wow!! Grow up, be an adult and do what’s right for everyone not just you. You have a lot to learn about running a business. It’s very obvious your parents think so as well. If they want to see their business they worked hard to establish fail they have the right person in charge. Step off your high horse and do what right!

47. MislynAugust 25,2023 at 11:37PM UTC

    I can tell you right now I’m not on my high horse and I’m offended that you would even say that. You don’t know me. You don’t know what I’ve been through in my life and what type of person I am. Your judging me by a post. I WAS never asked by the other employee if they could leave early that was just an assumption by my parents. If I had been asked I would do what I feel is right and let them do what was best for their family. I’ve been at a job like I said that my boss thought his ungrateful self absorbed family was all that mattered. I’m not like that that’s why I had a hard time with the well no you can’t do that because their are other people that may need to do that as well and we don’t want to start that here. They knew my last boss was not flexible at all and took advantage of me anytime he could for his benefit. I talked to the other boss at my job and he even said yes he’s taking advantage of you. So with that being said my parent knew my situation and when it was brought up again with school starting it was all of a sudden an issue. That right there is why I can here to ask advice. I played recording of my boss to family showing how he talked to me and talked to other people. He was very demeaning and disrespectful so I thought my parents made this position for me so I could do what’s best for me and my family and I’m learning that is not the case. My daughter is walking to school with a friend in the mean time and I will find a way to make it work. I’m so glad there are so many people out there to judge me by a post. Goes to show compassion has gone out the window along with many other things.