It has come to my attention that my boss is unable to perform and function in their professional role (e.g., rarely punctual, present, honest, or responsive to their team).

It has come to my attention that my boss is unable to perform and function in their professional role (e.g., rarely punctual, present, honest, or responsive to their team). This has prohibited the entire staff from completing a majority of their critical tasks. The staff have also endured antagonistic behaviour from this boss (e.g., threatening to have them all replaced, reminders that they are disposable, conjuring false statements about specific team members so far as to claiming one to be homeless in a discriminatory manner, making false salary claims and overall promises). When staff request their needs to this boss (e.g., for any information or approval to proceed with a program/operations procedure), the boss mis-contextualizes this request as a violation to their marginalized status in health/disability (blindness), gender (LGBTQ), and race (POC). Thus, the entirely unprejudiced staff is walking on eggshells while remaining unsupported to do their work. Each person working for this boss also falls into a marginalized category themselves, remaining tormented and traumatized by this dysfunctional environment and abuse of power. In response to resulting pushback from the board, I have personally witnessed this boss saying aloud, “they can’t fire me, it would look bad.” Each and every person working with this boss cares deeply for them as an individual with countless strengths and talents, although they do not recognize their leadership skills as being one. The organization continues to implement as many support systems as possible to this boss (e.g., through more hiring for their personal assistance, a generous wage, and continuous extensions on deadlines), yet the workflow is collapsing on itself with money running short. How do we manage?

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28 Comments

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  1. Anonymous

    You look for another job.

  2. IntentionGirl630054

    sounds like some recording to 'share' with management would be appropriate. I believe you would justify the recording to state that you wouldn't want the content to be taken out of context -- several recordings would be necessary, so that one recording could not be dismissed as 'everyone has one bad day' - I believe it would be legitimate to record as long as the recording goes no further than the management, and only for accuracy.

  3. Anonymous

    Depends on state law. This would be illegal in Michigan without everyone's permission

  4. Anonymous

    Be VERY CAREFUL with recording. If you are at the point of recording, don't bother and find a new job

  5. IntentionGirl630054

    Since Colorado is a one party consent state, people may lawfully record conversations in their workplace if at least one party to the conversation freely consents to being recorded. If the person doing the recording is part of the conversation, then no one else’s consent is needed because the recorder has his/her own consent. -- Totally depends on the State laws.

  6. Anonymous

    I presume you have gone up a level and talked to their boss. If so, they have no intention of changing anything, so the only thing that will get their attention is for some of the high performers to resign. Look for another job. Life is too short to deal with this type of dysfunction.

  7. Anonymous

    I totally agree with you.

    Normally, though, these bosses will never wake up despite the highest performers leaving; it would mean they have to admit they caused issues. Ain't gonna happen. (Too bad it has to be that way!!!)

  8. Anonymous

    All the better reason to get out now.

  9. Anonymous

    If the boss is like this -- I've worked with one who constantly cussed me out - time to move on. NOTHING can be done to fix except parting ways

  10. Anonymous

    To be honest, first mistake was approaching the boss. With this amount of boisterous concerns you and others needed to partner with HR and/or legal, clearly. I would suggest written statements from each, with what, when, where and who else witnessed. I don't understand 'pushback from the board' at all. Go to legal.

  11. Anonymous

    I agree. Approaching them is a bad idea.

  12. Anonymous

    Run away. I'm not sure why the people working for this boss care about the boss as an individual when the boss clearly has no respect or care for them - you can't blame this all on lack of leadership skills, some of this has to come from being a decent human being. If the company won't fix the problem by moving the boss into an individual contributor job where they could stand to actually be successful, it's time to leave.

  13. Anonymous

    It's true, no one feels respected. It's best for everyone to scatter.

  14. Kat

    Have you gone to HR/Legal and/or whoever is above the boss with your concerns? Have you (personally or the whole team effected by the behavior) documented the verbal abuse and lies? Have you documented and informed the org that the extra support the org is providing isn't helping? {You provided X support but deadline wasn't met.} If you've done all this and no one above your boss is willing or able to make any changes, then it's time to leave. You can't fix this. Why the org is putting so many resources into propping up this boss is beyond me. Why anyone at this org thinks he a great guy despite the fact that he sucks as a boss/leader also doesn't make sense. There's some very messed up personal and organizational dynamics at play here. You and everyone in the org deserve better. It's time for all of you to start looking for new jobs. It won't fix what's wrong with the org, but it will do wonders for your mental health and career if you (and the others) put yourself first.

  15. Anonymous

    The board hired this boss so they feel responsible for making things work for them. We're such a tiny nonprofit that I'm basically the HR/legal.

  16. Kat

    Thanks for the additional info. You really can't fix this situation no matter how much you might want to. The board is invested in the boss and won't fire him, and the boss knows it. They're enabling him, but you don't have to. It's time to look for a new job. I hope everyone else in the org does too. You all deserve better than this.

  17. Anonymous

    I agree, it's so toxic.

  18. Anonymous

    Yes, I agree. Taking appropriate steps, documenting the issues, and seeking support are crucial. If the situation doesn't improve despite these efforts, it's best to prioritize your well-being and explore better career opportunities.

  19. Anonymous

    Receiving feedback and experience like this? LOOK FOR A NEW JOB

  20. GirlBossanova934974

    I would be cautious and try to DE-personalize this whole thing. Your boss is not acting out personally against you. He's an equal opportunity jerk! I would also try to leave out the political points and hyperbole. This is a work related issue. Your boss is the abusive type. He likes to run his mouth and say really stupid stuff which should not be said. The company feels there is some sort of redeeming value in keeping this guy around. So why do they keep him around? Probably because folks like you are covering for him and his bad behavior. Soft peddling his bad points with others. So how do you manage? You let the chips fall where they may. You either leave the organization by transferring or finding another company to work for. On the flip side, sometimes you will run into a very nice boss. Just so happens, that boss is completely ineffective in getting things done or getting buy-in from superiors. I ran into a situation like that in the last year or 2. I departed from the company.

  21. Anonymous

    How do you manage? The best you can. I under stand that this hampers your ability to get the job done. If upper management continuously provides tools to your manager, that means they are aware of the weaknesses. They either don’t care how it impacts the workplace or are building a case against them. They may or may not know about the abuse and discriminatory behaviour. Since this could land them in legal trouble, it may be worth it to for those who have been treated this way to report it. It depends if there is a true HR that would recognise the potential legal liability or if this kind of thing puts a target on your back at your company.

  22. Zeecil Kimmel

    I was in a similar situation covering for my boss who had a full-time side gig as a real estate agent. One day I woke up, realized what a fool I had been (only took me two years), and found a new job. Best decision I made even with all the new challenges. Highly recommend.

  23. Anonymous

    If it is true that the work the manager is responsible for is not getting done, then the Board should fire them- it will look worse to let the organization fail than it is to fire an incompetent bully. It is unclear what your role is-- an employee of said person or a bystander? I recommend the board take action and fire her. ASAP. They can speak to counsel first, and perhaps do due diligence of documentation, but this sounds frankly absurd.

    If you as the writer have no influence with the Board- take care of yourself first, (which may mean getting a new job). You should report each incidence of verbal abuse or discrimination and encourage your peers to join you. If you don't want to do that, then find a new job.

  24. Klaudia D.

    It's just a job. You don't need to save the world, just move on for your mental wellbeing. Do it without guilt or regrets!

  25. Anonymous

    Totally agree.

  26. Anonymous

    Report him to HR. Start recording conversations with him. No boss is better than this.

  27. Anonymous

    It's true. They're abusing an entire victimhood narrative.

  28. Anonymous

    That's exactly it.

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