Struggling with personal dynamics with admins

Anonymous

August 30,2023 at 1:07PM UTC

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Struggling with personal dynamics with admins

I need some outside perspective on a situation that is getting quite stressful. I work for a large international corporation as an individual contributor, reporting into a (really fantastic) manager with 3.5 direct reports including me. The half report is a shared admin who we acquired after some organizational reshuffling. We also have the use of an admin who supports my manager's boss. Neither admin is particularly strong, tending to both need to be told in fine detail what needs to be done and how to do it. Both admins also have quite forceful personalities that clash with each other. It has been frustrating but manageable until recently when they needed to work together on a task for me involving an external person - a task that I don't personally know how to do. This has been a disaster in no uncertain terms - miscommunications, multiple mistakes, wrong systems used, and everything is taking way too long. Now they are openly hostile to each other and individually calling me to complain about the other, asking what to do next on the task and refusing to be in a meeting without me there to mediate. I don't manage either, so it isn't really my place to navigate the interpersonal issues, but I do need this task to get done. I have spoken to my manager, and he has had the same issue and doesn't have any other ideas for how to navigate the situation. Even worse, I tried to help one of the admins by connecting her to someone who does know how to do the task, and she called me up extremely angry for giving her confusing information. She is now refusing to have conversations about this and will only email me. If being helpful and making connections is off the table, and I can't personally guide them on how to do the task, then I'm not sure how to move forward from here.

My options as I seem them are:

1. sit in on all the meetings either of them is having to make sure the right information is getting processed and act as a buffer.

2. step out of it and tell them they need to figure it out without me, but risk it not getting done or blowing up

3. begging someone else to do it for us.

Am I missing another option?

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April LineAugust 30,2023 at 1:38PM UTC
Sounds like you need to go back to your manager and ask for support dealing with these two. Maybe all 4 of you sit down and your manager has to say something forceful like, "y'all need to put your interpersonal stuff aside and work together to get this project done. Anonymous is lead on this project, and you need to listen to her. If you have questions, ask, don't guess. We're already behind..." and such.
If your manager is unwilling to manage these ninnies, i would question your assertion they're great and either figure out how to use other folks on your team to get this project done, or your option #2.
Also, their behavior is really inappropriate, and they should be written up at least. Writeups would also probably scare them into doing better at least temporarily.
AnonymousAugust 30,2023 at 2:29PM UTC
Send a group email to include both admins, their supervisors and your manager copied. The email should say you are following up with both (add their names) on the task you gave them to complete. What have they done thus far, by when will it be completed (provide date you need it from them), do they have questions regarding the task? etc. If you see they do not reply then ask the supervisors to assist you with this important matter. Best of luck.
Barb HansenAugust 30,2023 at 3:23PM UTC
if I were in this situation, this is what i would do:
I would have a private meeting with my manager not a drop-in meeting so there is a record on our calendars that we met about this situation.
In this meeting, I would (re)discuss how the obstructive admins is affecting my and perhaps my team mates, ability to get the required work done.
I would ask my manager when he is able to deal with this management issue, and what he would like me to do in the meantime. I would suggest that I could cc him on emails between me and the admins so he was kept in the loop, and see what he says about that.
I would then follow up with an email to my manager with the details of our meeting.
Then I would wait for a few weeks. If nothing has been resolved. I would follow up with another email detailing all of the ways that the obstructive admins have delayed work product completion.
If a team mate asked me how I was handling the obstructive admins, I would share my plan and I would encourage my team mate to have a meeting with the manager and then share (by email) with the manager all of their issues and task delays caused by the admins.
Then I would stop worrying about someone else's inability to correct their staff. It's not my responsibility to fix another employees behavior, it's only my responsibility to bring the bad behavior up to that person's manager. I would not do any additional work because of those admins and my manager's inability to do their jobs, but I would record (not voice record but make a written record of what's happening) all bad interactions.
If the manager chooses to not deal with it, then, in my opinion, it's only my responsibility to inform my manager of how my work product delivery is being hindered by that manager's inability to their job.
If the admins treatment of me when beyond grumpiness, I would tell my manager about the incident and tell my manager that I was scheduling a meeting with HR to file a formal report.
i'm sorry that you have to deal with this situation, and I hope your manager does what he is paid to do - manage his staff.
AnonymousSeptember 8,2023 at 7:42PM UTC
Super thoughtful reply - thank you! I have followed some of your advice so far and it is working out well. I also ended up meeting with someone from HR to put it on their radar too. Document!
AnonymousAugust 31,2023 at 1:20PM UTC
Don’t make them work together. Admins tend to be loyal to who they report to, because they know that is their job. They do not often get along with one another because they have conflicting interests, each wanting to please their supervisor and stand out.
AnonymousAugust 31,2023 at 2:53PM UTC
Let them work it out. If they cant work together, FIRE BOTH OF THEM.......OR HAVE THEM FIRED.
AnonymousAugust 31,2023 at 3:22PM UTC
Why are the admin doing work for clients that does not involve scheduling and meeting logistics? Unless either or both have expressed an interest in moving up in your business, the task probably should have been delegated to someone on the team who works for the client. If all they signed up for was being an assistant, OF COURSE they don't know how to do the job!
AnonymousSeptember 8,2023 at 7:40PM UTC
I left out some details, but the task at hand is opening a purchase order to pay the external party. In this case, it is something within their job descriptions, but somehow neither has figured out how to do it.
Tricia BurroughsAugust 31,2023 at 3:34PM UTC
This behavior sometimes persists because they don't know what to do either. If this is the case, can you get support to find someone who knows how and leverage them to guide the admins? Otherwise, you need to micromanage the situation and sit in on every meeting. It will be your reputation in the end. Be very clear with your manager what you are doing and why you are doing it. I can also not recommend more that overcommunication to all parties in this situation is best. Good Luck
AnonymousAugust 31,2023 at 4:13PM UTC
Yes,
If you have HR bring them into this as a peacemaker in the meetings and expect them in there every time. Make sure that you openly talk about their dislike for one another and let them all know that the work needs to be done and personalities need to be put aside. If the work does not get done then the HR person will have to either PIP or write up both of them or consider replacing them both.
You could also pull them together yourself if you feel confident enough and bring your manager in there too as a witness and just say stop this nonsense. Let's just finish the project together. Let them know they are all being measured on working together on it and if they need you or your manager in there for direction or guidance before the deadline that you are available. Tell them not to gossip or bring others into it and that you want it to be a success for everyone because the higher ups are watching this. If you don't nip this BS in the bud it will continue long beyond this project.
AnonymousAugust 31,2023 at 9:27PM UTC
HR doesn't usually do this kind of thing. Involving them in ANYTHING is usually a bad idea.
asmith13August 31,2023 at 9:31PM UTC
Mediate? Um---yes we do. A huge part of my job is employee relations and mediating situations like this.
AnonymousSeptember 7,2023 at 9:41PM UTC
In my previous job, "Employee Relations" was a euphemism for helping supervisors manage people out of their jobs and write them up in ways that won't make the organization liable for a lawsuit.
asmith13September 8,2023 at 5:40PM UTC
That is unfortunate. That is not how Employee Relations or HR are supposed to operate. And good HR people do what is fair and right (and legal) to the employee while also keeping the the employee out of legal trouble. The two go hand in hand. And, in my experience, people fire themselves and are usually given a lot of warnings/chances to improve before it gets to the point of termination.
AnonymousAugust 31,2023 at 9:26PM UTC
Step out of it, and don't bother HR about it. That's their supervisor's duty.